Cuddling "Rules"

I have wanted to try a cuddle party, but feeling that it might be  bit overwhelming although I would probably get over that fairly quickly.  I love that there are established rules to guide interactions,  prevent awkwardness and help communication.   think I would like to try to integrate some of the rules I have seen into at least my preliminary cuddling interactions. I adapted these from CuddleParty's website, and I think that I may attend a cuddle party in my area at the end of July. If so, I will report back!

WHAT TO WEAR: Pajamas or sweats– nothing too risqué. Think more comfy than sexy

WHAT TO BRING:  No liquor. Juice or sparkling cider,  treats and snacks to share. A pillow or stuffed animal if you like.

RULES:

1. Pajamas stay on the whole time.
2. You must ask permission and receive a verbal YES before you touch. (Be as specific in your request as you can.)
3. If you’re a yes, say YES. If you’re a no, say NO.
4. If you’re a maybe, say NO.
5. You are encouraged to change your mind.
6. Respect your relationship agreements and communicate with your partner.

What are your thoughts?

docgatorb

I'm glad to see another member considerong organizing a facilitated event. Please do attend a cuddle party and report back your experience.

@Arielle Who are you inviting?

@SnuggleSymmetry I am not hosting, so I am not inviting anyone.  I am possibly attending a cuddle party.

@docgatorb see my response to SS... not hosting but attending. I will report back if I attend.

docgatorb

@Arielle I guess that you are getting encouragement. It doesn't take much to get a trained "Cuddle Party" facilitator to be a host if you are able to provide a location. They often have a mailing list, don't charge too much to attend (at least not in my area) and do a good job of going over the rules (no one is admitted late).

True, but right now I am just discovering this from myself with no short term intent of facilitating.... one step at a time!

docgatorb

Cuddlers rule while non-cuddlers drool.

A question has been asked about kissing and what areas that can be touched. Seems to me that kissing and intimate touching  of any type would be inappropriate.  What develops over time is between whomever cuddles....but can't believe that kissing and touching of private areas is even part of the discussion. Reinforces my firm belief in those rules I postulated and think I will be using.

Seems to me this site is really rather confused on the presentation of what it is about; this isn't FWB. The more I read on here the more I admit to feeling a bit uneasy about it, although some have clearly been successful with their buddies.

Atreides

@Arielle,  each snuggler can have their own rules.  There's no such thing as one set of rules for everyone.  
You can say its inappropriate etc for everyone, but in the end we are all consenting adults here and can do whatever you want.  how would anyone outside of the room enforce these rules anyway? Its up to the snuggler to define his or her own rules.  They can use the rules on this site as their rules if they don't feel like defining their own...but they should be free to define custom rules if they want...   
The point is, a client MUST ask the snuggler..don't assume what is ok for one snuggler will be ok for the next snuggler!  Always ask...always. 
Posting here and asking what other snugglers are ok with or consider to be appropriate or not, doesn't help you at all, because your snuggler will have his or her own rules and they may be more strict than anyone posting here.
For example, one snuggler I worked with didn't like anyone touching her face.  But another snuggler doesn't mind kissing on the cheek.  Huge difference wouldn't you say?   

@Blueadept : My intent in posting was to establish for myself what is important, and I simply asked for other's thoughts. Part of the problem that I see for the cuddling "profession" is that there are no rules or oversight, and anyone can call themselves a "professional"....anyone, with no accountability. Yes we are consenting adults, but I have gotten more than one sexual vibe since I joined this site, and to me, it is inappropriate.

I think I covered your second point with "You must ask permission and receive a verbal YES before you touch. (Be as specific in your request as you can.)If you’re a yes, say YES. If you’re a no, say NO.If you’re a maybe, say NO.You are encouraged to change your mind. Respect your relationship agreements and communicate with your partner."

I did not ask what is or is not okay, because I understand that in this environment we must set our own boundaries. I asked for others thoughts...as in setting up a dialogue.

crispycoconut

There is a client and professional contract for what is approptiate or not with cuddling.

That makes good business  sense Coco ... I started out thinking about  non professional interactions.

First experience with a kind, gentlemanly, and intelligent cuddle buddy. I am hooked. I encourage all of you to seek out your buddy(ies). Choose wisely, be open and reciprocative and reap the rewards of human touch and kindness.

docgatorb

Now Arielle is bragging, I thought it was only Crispin, Is there something contagious going around?

jessimarie

What are going rates?

Going rates for cuddling? You would do best to ask someone that is doing it professionally @jessimarie.