Why aren’t there background checks?

AtomicBlondeAtomicBlonde
edited May 2021 in General

So I’m really new to this, like so new this is my first post and I made my account 20 minutes ago. So I’m kinda wondering around the website and I’m sitting here thinking... what if one of these men or women were to hurt me? What would happen? Seems like there isn’t background checks? Seems very trusting of people to just let random stranger come in and cuddle you without knowing if their a psychopathic serial killer?

Comments

  • [Deleted User]DarkLordChungus (deleted user)

    It would likely take a ton of time and energy to process background checks.

    It's generally not a good idea to jump into a cuddle with a complete stranger. Talking with a prospective cuddler to better discern whether or not they're a serial killer is recommended.

  • RezzRezz

    Background checks come at a cost. That cost would be passed down to its members.
    Most would just flee the site over paying additional fees and utilize one of the other free cuddling sites. The other sites IMO are way sketchier.

    Alot of people here want privacy. Handing out identifying information that could potentially be compromised is not on their to do list.

    Give yourself time to assess if the cuddler is a good fit by exchanging messages.
    Karma is a decent indicator if someone is safe.
    Meet in a public setting.
    Have a system in place that allows people to know where you are and who you're with and for how long.

    Hang around the forums, you'll quickly find there's alot of positive and happy people here not looking to toss you in a meat grinder. ☺️

    Welcome to the site!

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod

    @AtomicBlonde welcome! Cuddle Comfort is a social networking site, like twitter or Facebook. They don't do background checks, and neither does Cuddle Comfort.

    Meeting people from the Internet is a bit like crossing a busy road: if you don't look left and right you might get run over.

    Take your time, get to know this place a bit, and trust your gut, and you'll be fine. Don't hesitate to Block and/or Report anybody who is creepy or horrible, the site is very good at banning undesirables.

  • 77767897776789

    Depending on which state you are in, some states have free court records websites. With full name and date of birth you can look at past criminal charges, money judgments, etc. And asking for a picture of photo id is a good way to get this info, and another security measure as well.

  • UCpaaHVg6u0UCpaaHVg6u0
    edited May 2021

    @AtomicBlonde Background checks are useful if you want a credit history or criminal history, yet ultimately a background check won't show what's in somebody's heart. They don't even predict with complete accuracy who will default on a contract or commit a fraud against an employer. I don't think it's normally a part of human interaction, but was introduced over contractual requirements. In my field, massage therapy, most states have established licensing so that a background check is implied. Among the professional cuddlers, we see a field almost entirely of women with mostly male clients. The background checks probably should be for the men who are clients, but it's not likely any pro would insist on one. We suggest the karma rating serve as a confidence-instilling factor, although it's far from perfect. On some profiles you will see varying numbers of comments by other cuddlers who have had either virtual or real-time interactions with the person in the profile. Your question is reasonable and yet it sounds a little absurd to me because of how it does not show what's in a person's heart. I hope you have great experiences if you decide to meet somebody here. It's probably best to satisfy what your intuition and common sense tell you, when interviewing a person.

  • waynewvwaynewv
    edited May 2021

    You could Google there legal name with the middle initial if they would give you that, if you do, put it in parentheses.
    Like if you Google John A. Smith, it will find every John and then every Smith, but if you put "John A. Smith", then it will only look for the full name of John A. Smith. Most of the time it will show criminal records, which may help.
    I have found if you read thru the reply's as well as the posts that people have started, you can tell a lot about them.
    After reading many, I thought, no way I would want to cuddle that person !!. Also as many women here have said, always go by your gut feeling. I have met several 1st. time out in public, like for a meal or ice cream-coffee-etc., then if you feel good about that person then go forward with a cuddle, if you don't feel about the person, then walk away.
    All most forgot, read there karma !!!

  • PolarMtnHuman95PolarMtnHuman95

    I haven't actually thought of this. That would definitely be a very great idea. There should also be an introductory course on consent for those getting a new account, and upon that being launched, all users should also be made to look at this at that moment of logging back in because like literally, I keep hearing of people, especially men, not respecting consent or them attempting to make it non-platonic. This platform is not supposed to be for non-platonic purposes and shouldn't involve any strings attached, just as it says.

  • xandriarainxandriarain

    Whenever I meet a new client I always video chat with them before agreeing to meet them. I find that it really helps to see how they react when I review my boundaries.

  • AmortentiaAmortentia

    Cuddle in public. That's what I do and have my profile set to that. After I get to know them then I offer a none public option. So handle it in a way that works for you. Good luck cuddling!

  • WKplatonicWKplatonic

    I do my own background checks, it calls vetting. Do your homework, ask the right questions. If you get a good vibe go for it and enjoy.

  • beachdudebeachdude

    Those who want Cuddlecomfort to perform background checks should state the subscription price they are willing to pay. The cost for Cuddlecomfort to background check individuals would be in excess of $150 per year for each person. A social security# is required for US background checks. I'm not sure many people would be at ease with Cuddlecomfort managing their SS#. It seems best to perform your own vetting.

  • xandriarainxandriarain

    Maybe there could be a third-party background check service cuddle comfort worked with and members could opt in for a background check and in return have something on their profile saying they were “verified” or something like that.

  • CatloafCatloaf
    edited May 2021

    Part of people’s issue with coming to a site like this is discretion. Even well known brick and mortar companies like Cuddle Sanctuary or Cuddlist don’t conduct background checks to my knowledge. They do however have their cuddlers trained, and they’re trained to the extent of being able to accurately identify who is a fit for service and who is not.

    You’re an enthusiast though, and since CC is unlikely to ever implement this even just based on sheer cost and liability, it’s paramount for you rely on your gut instinct. Practise all the same precautions you would if you were on, say, a regular site where you meet people. The general guidelines don’t go out the window just because this is a site specifically for cuddling.

    The moderators here are vigilant and rest assured - if someone is breaking rules or otherwise proving to be unsavoury, they will get the boot.

  • [Deleted User]DeadGirlWalking (deleted user)

    The problem with that is that a background check only works if the person has been caught for their crime and it is on record. The Zodiac Killer was never caught. There are serial rapists who have gotten away with their crimes until their deaths.

    I'm not trying to scare you off the site, I'm advising that you exercise caution, meet in a public place, advise a friend where you are going, who you are going to be with and when you expect to be back. Be sensible and vet people as well as you can. Decent people will understand your caution.

  • UKGuyUKGuy
    edited May 2021

    The risk is the same as meeting someone in any other way. Does the person you meet at a party or a bar give you their background check report? You are responsible for your own safety, so do your own due diligence.

  • HollydollhugsHollydollhugs

    The background checks would be a huge cost and an extra step that Cuddle Comfort would have to organize and pay someone to handle. I think it would be great if there were no cost involved, but there is.
    For me, everyone has to agree to a “code of conduct” before I can agree to meet with them. This discusses the boundaries and other measures that keep everything clear and safe. Also, you can tell in a conversation what someone’s intentions are. On a different site I’m on, a man asked if I could wear pantyhose and heels 😳, to cuddle? I told him what my cuddle clothes would be, but I already know I will not be meeting with him, because he’s mentioning being a “leg” guy. I wouldn’t feel comfortable with meeting. You almost develop a sixth sense. If you don’t have a good feeling, there is usually a reason why.

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