I have cuddled with 3 pros from this website. One required a 30 minute video chat, a driver’s license, and a signed contract before cuddling. One only asked for a brief video chat before we scheduled a cuddle, and one didn’t even ask for a video chat (we only communicated via text before meeting in person). All 3 were amazing cuddlers and I look forward to cuddling again with each of them.
With that said, I was very surprised about being asked for a driver’s license and being asked to sign a contract (the request for ID and signing a contract was explained to me near the end of the 30 minute video chat). While I was not 100% comfortable showing my driver’s license, I (correctly) felt that I could trust her and I went along with the request.
The moment I showed her my driver’s license (during the video chat) felt like a pivotal moment and in hind sight I am very thankful that I made the choice I did. However, that was a decision I made at the moment based on the sum of the circumstances and my comfort with her after a 30 minute video chat. If another cuddler asked me for my driver’s license and to sign a contract I would again make the decision on the totality of the circumstances at the time.
Everything is getting so bureaucratic, this is so sad ..
@tinam00n ~ I agree with a lot of the advice you've been given but wanted to add on a couple considerations since you're new to your area/not yet established there.
Check in with your local PD and see what they recommend around all this and how welfare check requests are handled. Because even someone who is out of state could be your backup, should you not contact them at the time(s) you've said you would (as long as you've sent the pertinent details to them in advance).
And [please everyone don't get the following all twisted...], I realize cuddling isn't sex work, however there are cities that have safety protocols for those in the industry (even where it's not legal) to help get them access to various services which may include confidential safety checks . So it might be beneficial to ask your local PD about those too, and see if as a Platonic Cuddler you can have access to them since you're likely to have similar safety concerns.
Just ideas/suggestions. I realize many don't have a pleasant view of the police these days and for good reason. But in my [limited] experience, those who are Community Liason Officers are really good at what they do and are full of useful info/resources.
Hope that's helpful and good luck.
People need to just live and let live. There is hundreds of users on here, everyone is different in the ways they cuddle and and will have different ways of going about things. Just flow with it. If you don’t vibe with someone because of how they do things, move on and keep looking for a better match it’s really not that hard, I really don’t understand the hostility towards some and their preferences.
@dave31415 @Ahmedali999
This will touch on some things both of you said/asked.
I personally am not lacking physical touch/cuddles in my life but I am willing to provide them and help other who are in need.
I would personally never cuddle someone just for the sake of cuddling someone because it takes time out of my schedule. I work multiple freelance gigs (one of which is working as an assistant for an intimacy coach) and I’m in a relationship.
For me to justify using my time to accommodate someone cuddle requests I do need it to be mutually beneficial & since I’m not in need of physical touch/cuddles the benefit for me is the financial aspect.
I do understand that paying for a hotel room is cost prohibitive for a lot of people — but for some people it’s not for multiple reasons. Sometimes they themselves can’t host for whatever reason, sometimes they are in town for business and already have a hotel room & some people can afford it and want to book a session with me specifically.
If I don’t get as many sessions due to my personal preferences — that’s ok. That’s more time I have for work projects, passion projects, spending time with my partner/friends and/or my hobbies.
Again — I don’t expect everyone to be willing or able to accommodate my requests. That just means we aren’t a good fit.
@Mare_Bear totally makes sense for you to have an office style location if your business volume justifies it. I would actually prefer that kind of set up but I’m not in a position to do something like that. I travel a lot so some of my sessions aren’t even local. I do would love to have a converted sprinter van one day and I could definitely use that as a cuddle spot — but that’s far off in the future.
@lavenderbubbles the idea of a cuddle van sounds so amazing!! Or even a cute little camper/trailer. My mind is going wild of all the awesome Decor possibilities 😍😍😍 van life has always been so intriguing to me, but not something I’ve been financially set for just yet! Hopefully one day in the future I can partake, even if it’s just for a little while 😌
I would never sign a contract to cuddle and please guys, never ever ever ever send a picture of your drivers license to anyone unless you really want to potentially subject yourself to identity fraud. I don’t even show my ID when using a credit card, it’s not required legally and if a merchant insists, I decline.
@afmaced your comment has stuck with me for hours now, I suggest taking a look at the rules & moderators thread, specifically the part that mentions professional cuddling. If it’s not for you, it’s not, and that’s totally fine but to be so rude and hateful towards them is really not cool and extremely discouraging for professionals here who are trying to be here to support people through loving touch and who actually gain from our services. We deserve to be here and feel welcomed. Life is stressful enough as it is, and we are regular people too. it takes a lot of strength to keep a positive spirit to share that good energy with people, to have people flat out make us feel unwelcome to being here and offering our services by calling it sad, is not only discouraging for pros but is also inherently shaming clients who do benefit from the services. It’s not kind and this space should be a safe place for anyone wanting to cuddle or offer cuddling to others.
@Brandi
I agree with what you’re saying 100%. Even if booking a professional cuddles isn’t for you that doesn’t mean the service or the people who provide it are sad /make the cuddling community sad or unwarranted /unwanted.
There are other ways to get physical touch/affection from people but booking a service sure does take the guess work out of it and make it an NSA clear cut situation that doesn’t take as much effort as trying to date or connect with friends and then see who wants to cuddle.
Also if you are connecting with other enthusiasts / non professionals you may not receive a reply from them or even be able to find anyone in your area who wants to cuddle for the sake of cuddling.
My experience talking to a couple clients was that they did want to find a mutual enthusiast but they just weren’t finding who/what they were looking for and that’s why they decided to book a pro.
As you mentioned — it does take strength to remain positive and share that with others.
I know I’m a very comforting and positive person to be around for my friends and family & many people have told me how comforting my hugs/cuddles are. I also have the benefit of working with/for a tantric intimacy coach which further benefits the way I share space with others.
I provide this service because I know I can be a comfort to others — but it’s still a service since I’m not seeking those things/am already fulfilled in those areas.
☝️ We all should respect eachother,also we should respect members who are against some requirements, there's a reason behind disagreements. also members who disagree if they don't like some tough requirements should move on and find a different pro which is simple like drink water. I don't mind giving my ID if I trust the person and he/ she trusted and reliable, we live in a scary world, i have been a victim of fraud for giving my details. I had car penalty fine $500 while I never ever had or driven a car in my life, and I Think it was a friend using my details This is a friend, how about a unknown person . that's the danger of giving my personal details. Someone can use my details to commit crimes such as frauds, ect . ☝️ we respect some pros requirements, if it doesn't apply to us, we look for a different pro. Regards . There already cases of fraud about deposit. I don't mind paying deposit if the person reliable, there are fraudsters make multiple accounts and ask deposit to scam people. Just example.
But if all you are doing is flashing your ID for two seconds so they can make sure you are the same person, do you really think they are going to memorize your license number? Or is it less about that and more clients not wanting pros to know their names? At any rate, if you don't want to do something, don't -- but the fact that you don't doesn't mean it's wrong.
@WriterGF i already gave my ID picture to 1 pro, she's from an organisation called UK professional cuddles where they issue certificate, and she has connections with other pros, which she's trusted,reliable ect . Imagine random fake members asking for ID,personal details would you rush to give. There are professional fraudsters can use your details to take loans from banks then u be in trouble.
There are already cases here about paying deposit in advance.
Virtual vide is fine, meeting for some is fine. ID if for some is fine go for it.🤗 I only do it if I really trust the person.
At the end of the day everyone free to do what he wants, it's not the end of the world.
@lavenderbubbles > I do understand that paying for a hotel room is cost prohibitive for a lot of people — but for some people it’s not for multiple reasons. Sometimes they themselves can’t host for whatever reason, sometimes they are in town for business and already have a hotel room & some people can afford it and want to book a session with me specifically. If I don’t get as many sessions due to my personal preferences — that’s ok. That’s more time I have for work projects, passion projects, spending time with my partner/friends and/or my hobbies. Again — I don’t expect everyone to be willing or able to accommodate my requests. That just means we aren’t a good fit.
@lavenderbubbles > I do understand that paying for a hotel room is cost prohibitive for a lot of people — but for some people it’s not for multiple reasons. Sometimes they themselves can’t host for whatever reason, sometimes they are in town for business and already have a hotel room & some people can afford it and want to book a session with me specifically.
🤗 I like your justification and respond 👌 which is shows u have inner beauty. I don't mind paying if I'm rich , there are amazing pros who deserve everything good.
@Mare_Bear > know me. This eliminates the expense of hotel and the cost is dispersed in my rate. Also, please don’t ever tell me my rate is too high! Subject for another day but a little peeve of mine. The amount of overhead in being a professional is not small.
Your rate is too much 😱 lower the rate by %50 for us 😁 just kidding 🤪 ur service is 👌
I would give ID at first meeting only if provide also gave ID. But who gives it first. I say the provider.
@Ahmedali999 I can absolutely understand not wanting to scan your license and send it off to a stranger. For one thing, you have no idea who else might have access to his/her email. But I would have no problem showing it on meeting. (In my case, I would probably just give my name and tell them to Google me. Saves time.)
@happytimezm Not sure what difference it makes who goes first?
@WriterGF I would have no problem showing it on meeting. (In my case, I would probably just give my name and tell them to Google me. Saves time.)
Showing is absolutely fine, but scan it,keep copy of it no☝️.
My name doesn't exists in Google 😁
So far what I’ve seen here is several clients saying they never have and will never sign a contract, and several pros explaining why they require one. I’ve also seen some clients say they have signed contracts, and some pros say they don’t require them but don’t blame pros who do. I have yet to see a pro say they would never require a contract.
To answer @RayOfHope :
can i ask pro cuddlers, who require me to sign a contract, to provide me their tax id and a legitimate receipt of payment that ensures they pay tax on their cuddling income?
Yes, you can! My business is Daniel Greene LLC, I have an EIN, I report all my income to the IRS (even when I don’t earn enough money from a particular entity to warrant a 1099), and you can be darn sure I write off all my expenses too! 😉
I’m an open book, and I have no need to operate “under the table.” I have a business PayPal account, a website under my name since 1998, and have had multiple social media accounts for many years now, including a robust LinkedIn profile. I’m Cuddlist trained and certified and listed on their site by full name. There’s no doubt about who I am, what my credentials are, and what my professional reputation is. Having been totally above board about my identity, I’m in my rights to require that my clients give me their real names, show proof of ID, and even sign a contact. If that turns some clients off, maybe they’re not for me and I’m not for them. I amiably open my arms to the next cuddle client. 🤗
@nurturingman same here! I have an office space I operate out of, and I report all my income from this! Would love to have a storefront proclaiming "Cuddle Sessions Here" but I'm not sure my city is ready for that yet
@nurturingman my 100% respect to you 🙏🏻 🌌
I've been thinking about the idea expressed here that if cuddling is treated like a business it loses its humanity in some way, that it becomes sterile and transactional. Those who are doing platonic touch as a career are drawn to it because it is so up close and personal and most are looking to connect with people on a very intimate level. Being a business does not take away that level of dedication to serving the enjoyment of the cuddler at all, it is mostly for safety concerns which are REAL. Not to mention the legal obligations of running a small business.
When I see my massage therapist I can book with her online and I can see her in a clinical setting. I see my same person who by now knows what scented oils I like, knows me by name, greets me with a hug ~ this is my professional that I see. Seeing a cuddle pro is very similar to this and seeing that trusted person is absolutely beneficial and nurturing in any setting. An office can be made to feel like a sanctuary. I feel that so many here are dismissive because they don't want to think of platonic touch as a valid profession when it actually is and it is much needed. When you resent people who are taking payment for the energy exchange that happens when they are holding space for another it seems like you are trying to spoil the pot and dismiss pros as something you would __ never__ do, contracts as something you would __never__sign - this is negative thinking. People come away from a professional cuddle session full of bliss, relaxed, at times euphoric and some of that is their asking for and getting exactly what they wanted. Seeing a pro is leveling up from cuddling with someone who is also looking for their needs to be met. The pro is focused on you, that is a different type of session and a different dynamic.
Good for you, @vivalalife ! I hope in the future cuddling will be such a respected profession that such a storefront can proclaim "Cuddle Sessions Here" loudly and proudly!
Thank you, @cuddles_ndream 😊
And @Mare_Bear , amen!
Also, @JohnR1972 , thank you for speaking for yourself as a client and how you have worked with various professionals and have complied with their requests based on their trustworthiness. I love what you said here:
I would again make the decision on the totality of the circumstances at the time.
Thank you! I love seeing decision-making as a case-by-case process that takes into account the totality of circumstances. 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
contracts as something you would __never__sign - this is negative thinking.
@Mare_Bear So if someone decides not to sign a contract, which a lawyer once told me to never do without a lawyer to look it over, I am a negative thinker? Yet you are proposing that you are going to share positive energy with me? That doesn’t square with me.
Look, I have had sessions with dozens upon dozens of pros and not a single one has ever asked me to sign a contract. And if they did, I wouldn’t and I would find someone else. That does not make me a negative thinker. Your post makes it seem like if someone isn’t on board with your prescribed way of doing business, they are a negative Nelly. Sorry, but they are just not a match for you, that’s all. I know I wouldn’t be a match for you as a client because you seem too judgmental about my views. We all have our reasons for doing things the way we do them, but please don’t judge them in a negative light because they run counter to what you hold dear.
I love the pros I have seen. But none have requested a contract and most of them have seen me at a hotel. You have an office and require paper work. That is fine and I am sure you have clients that love you for what you do…but your way is antithetical to mine and that is ok because there are many pros who run their business different from you. Doesn’t make you right or me right. It is preference, plain and simple. Stop painting those who prefer a different approach as miscreants.
And let me add that there are many enthusiasts who do blast pros for their pricing, cuddling for money, etc. That is not right. You don’t like the price? Find someone else. Don’t like the transactional nature of a pro? Don’t use a pro. But the OP asked everyone’s opinion on the contract and several answered, including me, that it was a dealbreaker yet this has been translated into an anti-pro stance when it isn’t. Again it is a preference, and the pros advocating for a contract I wouldn’t use anyway so no big deal. I will find someone else.
Finally, it doesn’t matter if you are an enthusiast or a pro because regardless of which classification you are not everyone is the appropriate cuddler for you and there are as many reasons as there are cuddlers as to why that is. I could enumerate my dislikes but that wouldn’t help anyone. Just find someone you vibe with and go with them. The ones that don’t suit you? Forget about them and move on.
💯
@Ahmedali999 paying for a hotel room for cuddle session is not a problem for most people in the US.
Question and I didn’t read every comment so maybe I missed something but just by booking a session on cuddle comfort, aren’t you entering into a contract?
@RayOfHope thanks for clarification, in the US people income is good, flats are easy to rent, in London expensive like starting from $2000+ only people who are well educated and have good income can afford it. I get minimum wage which is 11$ an hour and live in a share house 1 bedroom,$800 the cheapest, outside London i can get $800 flat ,i don't want anyone to think I'm evil 😈 and greedy 🤗.
My last comment was aimed at someone who said that signing a contract made them feel like it was an obligated medical appointment and (paraphrasing) takes all the joy out of it. apparently Funcartel thought I was addressing them for some reason. Please keep showing me how uplifting your are! LOL
@Morpheus makes a good point. We all have had to agree to the legal wording on CC before we can even message another person.