How often do you get same day cuddle requests?

AmortentiaAmortentia
in General

Personally I dislike such requests so much and even have it written on my profile that I don't do same day requests and say there to give me some days/times when they're available to set something up but it still doesn't work. Not all read before contacting is the usual issue. Like just in the past week I had one contact me and I asked him what days/times are good for him and he replies with "today". I was like today is no good and that he needs to give me some days ahead. Then next day he replies and says what about today? Lol.

How do you deal with such?

My normal approach is to explain what it says on my profile to them and then tell them if they're serious to set something up to do it that way. Which is what I just did with the recent case. I like so far how this way helps remove the ones who are not so serious about cuddling and then the others who apologize and actually start to plan a day with me when it works for both of us.

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Comments

  • Sheena123Sheena123

    I can definitely see how it would be a bit frustrating. Especially if you have a job and a bunch of stuff to keep you busy.
    I can’t say much about it though because with this being the only thing I do here in Florida, it’s easy for me to say yes to last minute bookings. I actually get more people booking last minute than any booking ahead. It’s the majority of my business lol 😂

  • AmortentiaAmortentia

    @Sheena123 yeah this is just a side thing that I do around my fulltime job. Also not my only place for cuddlers so it does get frustrating! Are there a lot of cuddlers near you in Florida? I don't remember seeing too many in the threads at least here but sending you a hello from California! It's probably late there now but hope you had a good new years day. :)

  • theHugAlchemisttheHugAlchemist

    you might try using a booking calendar so it's automated and people can book whenever they want. Calendly is a good resource, and you can make it so people have to book ahead, like 24 hours or 10 hours or whatever you want. I don't have the time or energy to back-and-forth with a bunch of texts about scheduling. But this website requires you do the booking through them, if you are listed on cuddlist where they don't make you do that, it may work better for you. Send the booking link, and bam, never have to deal with texts back and forth again.

  • BrandiBrandi

    I’m the same way, I need time for so many reasons, first to be sure there’s enough communication so I know who I’m meeting with, and being sure we’re on the same page about all my expectations as well as answering their questions and concerns. I also have a different job I have to plan around, need to give my house mates notice so they know I’ll be using the space for company, especially if it’s for more than an hour. And I like to know ahead of time to mentally prepare as well as be sure to deep clean the place as well. But I also understand people who check this website out and want something to do on a whim, it’s just not possible for a lot of pros. 🤷‍♀️
    If someone doesn’t read through my profile and ask things I already have listed on there, I’ll still be polite and let them know what they need to know, but it makes me feel as though they might not be as respectful as someone who does take that extra minute or so to read through it all.
    And if they still don’t respect no as an answer for a request to meet same day after I’ve already had it written in my profile as well as messaging them declining the request it’s a huge red flag to me.
    It’s happened many times and usually they never come back to book with time in advance and I’ve had them pull the same move, I’ll ask to meet tomorrow or the following day and they message the next day asking for that same day it’s So very frustrating. 🥺

  • RadiantHugsRadiantHugs Mod

    I frequently request same day, though one caveat is that I already have an established relationship with the pros I use. Sometimes a day is going crummy, and I really feel the need to be held, so I ask. There are no expectations, it's just a request for time if it's available, if the pro is busy, no harm no foul.

  • AmortentiaAmortentia
    edited January 2022

    @vivalalife you know what that is a great idea. I can use that or find a similar one and then confirm it on here too. My repeat clients from here like to book through phone texts and then I come back here and just set it up for them to confirm. So I could use calendly first then here to confirm too.

  • AmortentiaAmortentia

    @Brandi exactly. There are some who like to do things on a whim which is why I put it on my profile that I actually can't and hope they read it to know it isn't possible for everyone. I also like to be polite with them and be respectful but also hoping for the same in return.

  • entwineentwine

    I'm sure there are many reasons to be frustrated by same day requests, but I feel like there are other things to direct that energy towards than a potential client, even if it's something that you don't normally (or ever offer)...
    To a client, you just never know, because it "can't hurt to ask" (which apparently it can to some if it causes frustration).
    Personally, I typically dislike planning things too far in advance and have a lot of whims, last minute decisions, and spur of moment opportunities. I also not a fan of anticipation (which some can thrive off of, so to each their own).
    But I understand when trying to book a first time pro/client, there is much that typically needs to be done before meeting that same day just wouldn't allow for.
    I just don't see how it takes a lot of energy to simply say, "no, can't make same day happen" (and not just in profile, because maybe one day you can).
    Just my humble opinion.

  • Sheena123Sheena123

    @Amortentia oh yes, there’s a good handful of cuddlers here. It’s been a little slow because of holidays but it keeps me pretty busy usually 😃
    I hope you had fun during the holidays!! 🥳🥳

  • AmortentiaAmortentia

    @CuddlesByDeep that's understandable too and I can sometimes do this with my established repeat clients but they also know it isn't a guarantee so they just check in if I'm off early from work for it and if not then as you said no harm or foul. :)

  • AmortentiaAmortentia
    edited January 2022

    @entwine yes I do say that same day doesn't work but what if they just keep asking for same day over and over? Like what is the best method for that? For now I just redirect them to my profile or give them some future days/times that I have open that they can choose from.

    To a client, you just never know, because it "can't hurt to ask"

    Good point. In my opinion, to kindly bypass a profile that says no same day booking is to say something like. "Hey, I have a Tuesday after 5pm open and a Wednesday after 7pm unless you have a possible opening today after 5pm." Now that gives me something to work with and I can tell he will be easy to plan something with.

  • TravismoTravismo
    edited January 2022

    I’m not usually a recipient of cuddle requests, but as a client I actually prefer setting dates at least a few days or even a couple weeks in advance. Even if I’m having a rotten day and I really want to cuddle, scheduling one for a later date gives me something concrete to look forward to and makes it a little easier to get though the days leading up to it.

  • xandriarainxandriarain

    I struggle with the same thing. While I do cuddle full-time I still have a life and I often make other plans if I am not seeing clients. Also with my ADHD and anxiety it’s extremely difficult for me to deal with last-minute plans and changes to my day. I generally need to know what I’m doing ahead of time or it completely throws me off and I get nothing done.

    I also have it on my profile that I can’t take same day bookings but people still ignore it.
    What is really frustrating is when business is slow and I really need more bookings but the client says they can only do that day or they’re unable to plan ahead.

    Another problem with same-day bookings especially with new clients is I question if they think I am a sex worker. Some sex workers are on call and are set up to take same day appointments, even last minute. I am extra suspicious when I have someone asks if I will come to their hotel late at night. If they think I will come to their room late at night last minute what are the odds they actually understand that this is a platonic service and will respect my boundaries?

    Lastly the logistics of same-day bookings are difficult especially if they are last minute. If I’m hosting I have to have a sheet set ready to go and being the procrastinator I am, I only bother to wash my office sheets when I know I have an upcoming session. I also need to be showered and wearing appropriate cuddle attire. So imagine if I’m out doing something or in the middle of tackling a project around my house and a client suddenly reaches out and asks if I can be there in an hour or have my office ready in an hour. At this point I will usually go on to explain all the things I need to do to get ready and how it will take me at least a few hours at which point it will probably be past my 9 PM cut off time.

  • Maverick07Maverick07

    I've contacted Pros for a session before, when I travel for work.
    I try to set up a few times before my trip since I never know when I'll have a late commitment like dinner with clients; still, things change quite quickly, and more often than I'd like (I guess that's what happened early last year @Amortentia... but I'll be back someday! ;) ).

  • AmortentiaAmortentia

    @Travismo

    scheduling one for a later date gives me something concrete to look forward to and makes it a little easier to get though the days leading up to it.

    Yes! I need the plan time. If I try to fit something in last minute I will worry that I will be late to a session trying to make it work and as a pro I don't want to make last minute plans but ones I can for sure do and have the client count on.

  • AmortentiaAmortentia

    @xandriarain

    I also have it on my profile that I can’t take same day bookings but people still ignore it.

    Lol. Yeah if only the day will come when everyone reads your profile before contacting you. Now that would be amazing!

    What is really frustrating is when business is slow and I really need more bookings but the client says they can only do that day or they’re unable to plan ahead.

    I guess these days would be tough for a fulltime cuddler unless you have days to spare. With my current job I will take any days off personally and still not want same day bookings because then I already have a fun day planned for myself or with friends or whoever.

    Another problem with same-day bookings especially with new clients is I question if they think I am a sex worker. Some sex workers are on call and are set up to take same day appointments, even last minute. I am extra suspicious when I have someone asks if I will come to their hotel late at night. If they think I will come to their room late at night last minute what are the odds they actually understand that this is a platonic service and will respect my boundaries?

    Usually with that they ask me before the session if there's more than cuddling. Very rarely do I have someone attempt anything during a session though but then if I move their hand or face away then they don't attempt again so luckily hasn't been too bad there. And I had a few ask for late at night to their hotel which made me think the same but then I also have it listed on my profile that I can't do late at night since I have work to wake up early to so I always had an excuse to decline them on that. But at times it is best to remind that it is platonic before the session especially if they give off any odd vibes.

  • AmortentiaAmortentia

    @Maverick07 Yes! Still waiting to set that session! I might actually be visiting family in Missouri this year and if I do then I will let you know. It still isn't your state but Missouri is much closer to Wisconsin than California is at least so can be another possibility.

  • [Deleted User]Navj026 (deleted user)
    edited January 2022

    @Amortentia I'd also love to meet you if you came to Missouri:)
    Btw.. on the topic; I've set so many cuddles in advance and almost all have been canceled one way or another.. gets disheartening.. so maybe you're lucky to have such high interest:) just saying lol

  • AmortentiaAmortentia

    @jacobnav602 I have heard that it has been tough for enthusiast cuddlers to get or keep a cuddle session. Just don't give up! You can also try pros in your area at times since they are more likely to keep a session. But I can let you know if I do go to Missouri then or you can try a virtual session even since I have clients who book those sessions too.

  • [Deleted User]Navj026 (deleted user)

    @Amortentia yes thank you! Will look forward to connecting with you
    And yes with pros too sadly
    And yep; will keep trying lol :)

  • PeopleLikeUsPeopleLikeUs
    edited January 2022

    I've had two day-of cuddles. However, the request for a cuddle did not even come up until at least 20 minutes into our first meeting. Both cuddles occurred within 30 minutes of having met, both were public cuddles (one in a car, the other at the beach), both were female enthusiasts, and both became repeat cuddlers. However, most of the cuddles I book involve one full meeting (At least an hour), then time to think (a week or two), and then cuddles. One asked if she could hold my hand throughout our first meeting. We cuddled on our second get-together.

    The request (Which is actually a demand or set up for future expectations) for a day-of cuddle is peculiar. Even the mention of cuddling during a first meeting I find to be overkill. It's pretty obvious when two people meet on a cuddle site what both parties are considering. I always, in every circumstance, wait for the other person to make the suggestion.

    Pros, on the other hand, are foreign territory to me. With massages, it happens all the time, but the better the masseuse, the more the wait. I would take a first-time cuddler asking for a day-of cuddle as a red flag. The more cuddling becomes a thing, the more etiquette will come into play.

  • AmortentiaAmortentia

    @PeopleLikeUs that is interesting. I never had a meet up first (at least not yet) before a cuddle. However, I did offer a quick virtual meet up for a few minutes before an in person session but they were fine just to meet and cuddle right away which I don't mind either. If I sense a red flag then I just don't see them or talk to them anymore.

  • JoyfulHeartJoyfulHeart

    Although there are times when I'd love to have a hug today, I have a strategy that has seemed to work very well for me: I typically schedule 3 weeks or more in advance. I have a provider that I've seen a number of times, and our sessions always go very well.

    Because I have something on the calendar, I have something to look forward to. I count the days with a growing sense of anticipation. Throughout that time it's like I'm borrowing hugs from the future.

  • crystalJStarrcrystalJStarr

    I have the same thing. They want to book that day. I do this around a full time job as well. And Everytime I message when my availability is they never message back or book. I do not know what to do about it either.

  • RadiantHugsRadiantHugs Mod
    edited January 2022

    @crystalJStarr what happens most often with me is that I feel the need for touch during the day (often times if a triggering thing happens at work.) If a pro isn't able to do a short session that evening, I usually find after getting a night's sleep that I feel just fine the next day, so there isn't an urgent need to book again. If I were wealthy enough, I might seep a standing appointment with a pro every week (I actually did that for a short time to get over a period where I was really down), but I don't have the need (or the resources) to do that. That may be what is happening with the clients contacting you. However, I do understand that many first time requests for a same day cuddle may be suspect.

  • [Deleted User]AndrewSnugs (deleted user)

    Well, only one request so far, but it wasn't same day.

    When that starts happening I will just have to tell people they will have to be patient and wait their turn. I am only one person and I have a life outside of CC. So please, just let's take our time and get to know one another a little more first. I get it, you really want to cuddle, I can fit you in in about a week. Then I can love on you all you want with a back massage or whatever. Stay calm and eat some cheese.

  • MelancholyMelancholy

    @Amortentia keep in mind his experiences are mainly with non pros. It's very very different. With non pros you often meet in public first and sometimes multiple times before ever cuddling. Pro cuddlers on the other hand rarely meet even once before hand.
    It makes sense though. A pro cuddler is thinking of time as money and several clients they want to see while a non pro is trying to find just one cuddler she can see long term.

  • MxSmithMxSmith

    I pretty often get same day requests. If its a regular then I can accomodate so long as they give me several hours (none of this "Can I come over right now"), but if its a new person I tend to not do same day because I need enough time to screen and I don't like to rush that process.

  • WizurrWizurr

    In a perfect world advance notice is important. I am a tax guy so thats easier.
    But in the world of comfort you can't always know in advance.
    So if i ask for a same day appointment it might mean im hurting. So if you can't cuddle with me turn me down kindly and maybe that act of kindness will tide me over and i will book a later date.

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    There are several reasons on both sides of this issue. I can only offer my experience. As @jacobnav602 pointed out, I have had pros cancel. Not most of the time like him, but more often than I care to remember and as a very frequent business traveler that sucks when you may only be in a town 1 or 2 nights before going on to your next stop. So on occasion it precipitates a sane day cuddle. I know it is not my preference, and I do respect profiles that say no same day appointments and I do not bother those people. There are plenty that will accommodate, but it is a mixed bag as far as performance. But I think same day when time is not an issue is not a wise choice as a client/enthusiast because you do not have the luxury of discovering what they are about.

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