Karma

MorpheusMorpheus
in General

I think Karma is very important. I have had pros that have a strict screening process which I was able to forgo due to my Karma. I had a pro who would only have public sessions with first time clients but didn’t have an issue coming over the first time I met her for a private session and she said it was due to my Karma. What are your thoughts on Karma and how it affects your screening process and or willingness to see another cuddler whether it be pro, client or enthusiast?

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Comments

  • quixotic_lifequixotic_life

    I like that it's there, but I tend to rely on how they interact within the forums as well as with me directly in messaging too. Of course this significantly limits the number of people I may meet up with, but I feel like between the three I'm able to get a pretty solid read.

    I wish I could be more carefree about it all, but in order to get comfy I need to feel comfy. I'm realizing that may not make sense, but I need to be ready to deal with my reactions to a new person entering my personal space (along with whatever their energy/vibe is) before it can actually happen.

    So yeah, reading someone's sincere karma really helps with that.

  • Sheena123Sheena123
    edited January 2022

    I mean, I’ve had plenty of sessions with cuddlers that had amazing karma but were absolute trash and tried to push boundaries, but I will always advocate for karma. It definitely helps me. If you have over 5 and one of your karma belongs to someone I trust, I will immediately trust you as well. I always meet at a cafe first anyways but seeing a bit of karma allows me to see what they say and sometimes I’ll message them and ask personally if they (as a pro) can offer some advice.

    I’ve had better cuddles with those that have karma as opposed to those with none. I know everyone has to start somewhere, so those with zero karma don’t turn me off from having sessions with. It just makes it seem more appealing. It’s worse off for those that have been here since 2018 with not even one karma. That’s a red flag personally. But that’s why I have a free ice breaker meet up to still make a safe decision.

    Karma is very important. At least to me.

  • JoyfulHeartJoyfulHeart

    @quixotic_life I've often thought about the fact that anyone posting in the forum is writing their own karma.

  • MorpheusMorpheus

    @JoyfulHeart you just spoke some eastern philosophy. That was deep.

  • JoyfulHeartJoyfulHeart

    I've traveled so far to the east that I've arrived back in Pennsylvania! 🤓

  • [Deleted User]AndrewSnugs (deleted user)

    I have gotten a lot out of the forum. Plus, I have a guy mentoring me quite a bit on here, that helps a lot. It helps having someone with experience explain things for a new guy.

    I figure my ratings will come in time and I don't need to stress about it.

  • JoyfulHeartJoyfulHeart

    @AndrewSnugs

    I figure my ratings will come in time and I don't need to stress about it.

    I believe that you are right. I also believe that the people who do stress about it aren't making it come any faster.

  • [Deleted User]AndrewSnugs (deleted user)

    Exactly 💯

  • UKGuyUKGuy

    Karma is unimportant to me because I have no potential cuddlers who would look at it.

  • DaringSprinterDaringSprinter

    @JoyfulHeart said it best.

    I may not know who might, potentially, be thinking about cuddling me—but I do know the things I learn about other people in the forum affect my opinions on whether I'd like to cuddle them.

    It'd be a bit silly to think the things others learn about me in the forum don't affect their opinions similarly.

    This is my Karma.

  • GODHANDSGODHANDS
    edited January 2022

    @Morpheus is 100%...Correct Karma is VERY important, ALWAYS leave some for new Cuddlers..I couldn't get any cuddle sessions for months at first...now that I have some Karma,I by-past those screening issues as well and I'm even sought after now😎...HOWEVER ALOT OF WOMEN DONT LEAVE KARMA because they don't want their significant other to REALLY know they on here getting the attention they need and deserve...they tell them.."oh I just signed up to see what all the fuss is about"🤭🤭🤭...

  • SuperManCuddlesSuperManCuddles

    Yes, karma is important! Many types of people (especially women) feel safer/more comfortable with me due to karma numbers. Not just karma but the honest/positive way I present myself before, during and after session too. I have also heard from many pros that they felt pressured to leave good karma, due to possible fear of retaliation, so privately messaging karma members asking if the cuddler pushed boundaries or made them feel unsafe in any way may be a better indicator. I had female pros tell me they gave a man karma, then eventually deleted the karma, blocked and or reported them. No one on here should feel pressured or afraid, if you do let me or other moderators/admins know and or use the site report feature. Despite having much karma, not all of my cuddles turn into karma. Some people for many reasons may chose to be discreet, which is ok too. For me having quality cuddle sessions are more important!

  • xandriarainxandriarain

    Karma is great, especially for me, but I don't think it should be the equivalent of TSA precheck when screening new clients, pros, or enthusiasts. There are several reasons why karma can be misleading:
    1. Unfortunately, not everyone on this website has the same boundaries, and what one person may find acceptable, another may not.
    2. There is a little bit of an "I scratch your back, you scratch my back" mentality regarding karma. People have the incentive to exchange karma to boost their own image, even if it wasn't a five-star cuddle experience.
    3. Some people may behave themselves in some sessions but not others. A client may be great the first couple of times and start to push boundaries in the third or fourth session. Or a client may be well behaved for one pro, receive good karma, and then act like a predator with another pro. (I am using clients as an example because I don't interact with pros or enthusiasts in cuddle sessions)

    So whether you are a pro, an enthusiast, or a client, do not give someone the royal treatment just because they have a lot of karmas. Still, take your time to do a phone call, video chat, or in-person meeting before a session. My screening process is not just about whether someone is safe but also about learning more about them so I can give them a better session. New clients will often thank me in the first session for taking the time to do a video call before we met because it made them feel a lot more comfortable.

  • DouryusenDouryusen

    After my first session, I definitely left a sincere and positive karma on the pro I cuddled. That made perfect sense to me, as she was using this site professionally, and positive reviews would help potential cuddle clients be comfortable reaching out to her. I honestly didn't think that having karma on my side (not being a pro) really mattered, but she mentioned similar things that have been mentioned elsewhere in this thread. So, I got to learn a bit more of how the site works!

  • [Deleted User]ClubSamwiches (deleted user)

    Echoing what others have said, I really take enthusiasts’ karmas with a grain of salt. I wish there were reviews that professionals only could read.

    However, I do believe it to be more accurate for professionals and encourage enthusiasts to seek professionals with more consistent karma.

  • SashamcgeeSashamcgee

    I like Karma in the sense that I know they have met with other humans and have at very least not rped, mrdered or stolen from them. I also know who the people are that left them Karma so I can follow a trail and see if that person also have good karma and then I could reach out to those people if so desired for the real story.

    What I'm not so keen on is that you dont see a lot of 2's, 3's and 4's which to me indicates some lack of truthfulness in the system. I understand all the reasons why you wouldn't but i think it does cause some issues for the exact reasons the OP listed. There are people willing to drop their whole procedure because they see good Karma. And as @Sheena123 said that can still lead you to trash and boundary pushers.

    So I guess I like it but it's definitely flawed.

  • sunnysideupsunnysideup
    edited January 2022

    Yeah for sure all the 5s are there because of mutual benefit, and 1s are there if only someone acted crazy or was blatantly rude. So all karma tells you is that the person acted as one would expect a normal person to act, and that's it.

    Maybe if karma was anonymous, it would result in more detailed reviews, but that's really hard to implement (also if someone just had a session with someone it'd be obvious where the rating came from). And you'd also get issues of people being needlessly critical with one-way reviews (like on yelp or google reviews).

    And yeah for sure, just because someone acted normal once, doesn't mean that they always will. Prior performance is the best indicator we have for future results, but trust your gut if something seems awry.

    Also I think 3 and 4 star reviews would relate to more to how much someone enjoyed the cuddle, rather than how safe/professional the person was. I'm assuming if someone felt unsafe/uncomfortable, they would leave the session or leave a 1 star or report them/not even leave karma for fear of retaliatory karma. Posting a 3 star review saying that the cuddler was nice, but the cuddle wasn't as nice as it was with x person, is pretty hurtful to post publicly imo.

    One can read between the lines a bit. Even though everyone gets pretty much either 5 star or 1 star reviews, reading the reviews can be revealing. They might say specific things about what made the cuddle deserving of 5 stars.

    Therefore I think that the karma system does an okay job to see if the person is capable of acting normally/professionally. But it does have blind spots for opportunistic predators and people that fear retaliatory karma.

    The karma system isn't quite so great at showing how good the cuddle experience will be, but that seems like it's of less concern to most posters here.

  • CuddleWhoCuddleWho

    Karma is better than nothing but it’s far from a perfect signal. I’ve had terrible experiences with pros who’ve had plenty of great karma. And pros have told me about the terrible experiences they’ve had with clients who have great karma.

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    The unvarnished truth from an enthusiast is I am afraid to leave anything but a 5 star review for a pro cuddler because I feel that retaliation against males on this site is very easy. I know males have brought that down on themselves with their behavior, but I have had a few awful experiences with pros and did not give them 5 star karma. I simply didn’t give them karma. So the karma I give is honest but the bad pros are still out there unpunished. I have never had a bad experience cuddling an enthusiast, but maybe that’s because we get to know each other first?

  • Lev136Lev136

    Karma can be very tricky because there are many reasons why you would read it. To me, it tells a pro. if a potential clients is safe to meet and if you would like to meet them. To me, it's a way to get an idea of how well a cuddlier cuddles and whet to expect.

  • CuddleWhoCuddleWho

    Yeah, in the past I have had two instances of pros leaving me unjustified bad karma in revenge. One of those bad karmas was completely dishonest, basically saying I had been stalking her.

    So I doubt I’ll ever leave anything but 5 star karmas in the future.

  • MxSmithMxSmith
    edited January 2022

    You know, when I started I kind of thought of it like a yelp review, which I don't usually leave, but after a while I understood its pretty important in helping people know that you arent trying to scam them. I totally understand why people are reluctant to give a deposit to someone with no karma. Personally I do appreciate seeing that someone has good reviews from the cuddle community and it does help me feel safer; however, I have also learned the hard way that it doesn't substitute for screening or my normal boundaries around visiting people at their homes.

    One issue though is I know it can be annoying for karma leavers to be contacted by others for more information about me... particularly regarding my boundaries. I don't really know how often that happens.

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel
    edited January 2022

    @MxSmith I have only been contacted twice by someone wanting to know about someone I cuddled with that left karma. One I did not reply to because he did seem to be wanting to know about “extras” and another who just wanted to know how difficult it was to schedule a particular person and if she kept her appointments and I responded to that particular one. So not often.

  • Nature_Lover_Nature_Lover_

    @SuperManCuddles WHAT YOU SAID. Absolutely that.

    Anyone is welcome to message me to inquire about any karma I have left or been left or otherwise ask about people I’ve interacted with.

    I’ve also been left random negative / nasty karma from a couple people who I hadn’t even booked with. Huge thanks to moderators who swiftly reviewed, verified and removed!

    My thoughts are that karma can be a great indicator of what to expect though not a guarantee.

  • [Deleted User]Kintsugi (deleted user)

    I find karma can often give me peace of mind, and while I understand privacy is important, a completely blank profile, and refusal to send any pictures before hand is a HUGE red flag. It's really
    behavior in forums and in messages that tell a person's intentions.

    I've messaged other pros to see what to expect from a client they've left karma before, so I also use that to help verify things.

  • SideonSideon

    Karma is intended for post-meeting/post-cuddles. When people have left fraudulent karma, or create puppet accounts to cause havoc, they get rightfully reported, karma gets removed, and their accounts are banned.

    Is the Karma system perfect? No. A 1-5 rating does nothing for me by itself. If we had a rating system with more than one value that was an aggregate of ranked totals (1-5 for hygiene/cleanliness, on time, ease of scheduling, price point, etc), then I'd be more inclined to give ratings more weight. What I personally look for is how that person and cuddle was for the reviewer. The cookie-cutter "she was GREAT" doesn't say anything to me.

  • MorpheusMorpheus

    I noticed karma that was left for someone recently where the girl left him 5 stars but said some negative things. When I read it and saw the 5 stars, I thought that what she had written was a joke. I asked the guy and turns out it was negative although she did leave him 5 stars. It was actually quite amusing.

  • SuperManCuddlesSuperManCuddles

    @Nature_Lover_ THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!! @Morpheus I saw that too on a profile, some people don’t know how to correctly give negative karma lol 😂 🤣

  • cuddleNsqueezecuddleNsqueeze
    edited January 2022

    I agree with @Sheena123 that I have cuddled with some that had lots of positive Karmas but then were not respectful of boundaries or CC rules.
    @GODHANDS Not only significant others but I fear that one day one of my clients from my corporate job will see me on here, I have a Karma from when I first joined but not more than that because I would like to say that I tried it "a long time ago" or deny its me, however, my Karma says my name... lol I should prob ask if a Moderator @Sideon can edit my name from it to be more discreet somehow.

    @cuddle4health , this is done. Karma edited. [-Sid]

  • MCcuddles2MCcuddles2
    edited January 2022

    This is the order that karma is relevant in:

    1) from one enthusiast to another. This is the most genuine, as this is from a non professional human being who enjoyed their time with you in a mutual exchange of cuddles.

    2) from a professional.

    3) judging a person from their forum posts is the least useful, as people can post anything they want and display any persona they want online. often, people are much different in person than they come across from their posts. Gotta tread carefully here.

    Though, I think forum posts are a good negative indicator. Like if someone is always being aggressive, rude, and harsh you probably don't want to cuddle them. For safety reasons as well, because there are probably some deeper mental issues behind the behaviour.

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