Do you like the idea of plus 1’s being offered along with cuddles? 🧵

cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream
in General

Inspired by this video, “rent a man” … i personally think it would be awesome if both pros & enthusiast offer plus - 1’s along with cuddles … I think it aligns with the spirit of platonic cuddles / friendships … many times people are just lonely & want that plus 1 for say , go to the movies / go for a bite to eat / museum / ect … I genuinely think it would be beneficial for pros / enthusiats / & clients curious to know what you guys think ….

  1. Would you like if plus - 1’s are welcomed & encouraged along (or besides) cuddles?43 votes
    1. Yes
      67.44%
    2. No
      25.58%
    3. Other (plz comment)
        6.98%

Comments

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod
    edited February 2022

    I just talked about this in another thread and I'll copy my own post here:

    @cuddles_ndream you are referring to companionship, which is an old profession. For some reason it is not particularly well known. CC is not a companionship site, but many cuddle professionals do offer it as a service. It's completely normal on this site. In principle there are quite a number of professionals who would be delighted to accompany you stargazing, I've even seen professionals here talk about it.

    The term "plus one" has a dating connotation, which is obviously not appropriate here.

    This has been discussed before and if I remember rightly the conclusion was that professionals are able to offer companionship services here provided it is a secondary activity to cuddling.

    I voted Yes, obviously. Very much in favour.

  • Sheena123Sheena123

    I know there were a few who didn’t agree with pros offering their services to public outings, but I agree with you that I think it aligns with the views of this site to have someone to connect with. I’ve been invited to many different events and seeing the smile on their face makes it so worth it. Plus, it’s a lot of fun. I always make sure to draw a line in a way that my cuddler understands that I’m all for having a connection and being friends and as long as my time is being respected, let’s do this lol

  • cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream
    edited February 2022

    In principle there are quite a number of professionals who would be delighted to accompany you stargazing

    @CuddleDuncan how do you know? 😅 you sound like the cuddle comfort pro union rep lol jk but jokes aside, I don’t see how “plus - 1” has a dating connotation to it… at all, I avoided saying companionship because that definitely has a connotation to it, but I like the video above where it is very clear that it is a plus 1 / no dating ect, seeing the video shows this … , but you didn’t answer the question on how would you like the idea if it was offered, you just mentioned the overall stand on it here.

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod

    I remember a conversation on here where somebody said they'd love to have a client to go stargazing with. Can't remember who it was though, and I'm not going to dig for it. Numerous professionals mention companionship services on their profiles and while stargazing isn't a great one for a first meeting - going somewhere quiet and dark - it is an excellent one with somebody you know.

    I take your point about the terminology. A difference of perspective, or cultural linguistics perhaps. We're all talking about the same thing.

  • cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream

    I think you’re still missing the question, & you seem fixed on stargazing lol, but thanks for your replies : )

  • xeldaxelda

    Sounds like my ideal relationship: platonic physical intimacy, company for interesting outings/activites, with someone who has the financial resources to cover expenses. I would label that as asexual dating, which possibly blurs the boundaries of this site.

  • Nature_Lover_Nature_Lover_
    edited February 2022

    Hard yes from me! I am abundantly fascinated by all the possibilities- I believe there use to be a site called rent a friend with exactly this type of companionship in mind. Also heard of platonic dating and coaching services being offered which is very cool for those it works for. Definitely heard of wing men and women for hire and personally I’ve been a plus one and enjoyed a lot of platonic non cuddle activities.
    It can really strengthen the connection when accompanied by a cuddle session, or suffice entirely on its own. I’ve heard for many people it helps them ease nerves and build comfort.

    In the past I’d made a previous forum post celebrating an amazing experience and connection, while asking what the community here might be interested in or open to. I recall someone referring to offering non cuddle activities as the girlfriend experience and it seemed that they meant that in a very negative or harsh light. I googled and researched that term and found it to imply an escort or prostitution type of connotation so - ouch lol. No wrong answers in my opinion and to each their own. I truly hope everyone here finds exactly what it is they are seeking! Unless you are seeking, ‘the girlfriend experience,’ lol in which case I’d kindly suggest searching an alternative platform 🤣🤷‍♀️

    I think it’s great this site enables the flexibility of services as they may need to be restructured to accommodate the comfort and needs of both the provider and recipient of services as well as for dynamic influences such as the pandemic and this industry as a whole.

    Interested to see other thoughts and perspectives.

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod

    What's the question you think I'm missing?

  • cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream
    edited February 2022

    @CuddleDuncan the question is, how do you feel… You as a person, as an enthusiast , as a client .. -Do You- like the idea of a plus one being offered, that answer can be yes or no, but it is your own personal thoughts and sentiment as a client / enthusiast.

    Edit: as well as pros/ clients / enthusiats, just everyone’s own personal thoughts & sentiments.

  • Nature_Lover_Nature_Lover_

    @xelda that is one of my primary concerns within this realm, blurring boundaries - and I’ve found it to be the transactional part which keeps things in tact. Definitely training, learning, all of those things help but it’s challenging stepping into a new industry with limitless possibilities. The stakes couldn’t be higher - we are working with and for people while ourselves also being people with feelings and souls. That’s why I so value this platform and forum which can offer support and continuous improvement.

  • ShaneSchruteShaneSchrute

    @Nature_Lover_ ”Hard yes!” I love this and I’m stealing it. :)

  • sunnysideupsunnysideup

    I guess my first response would be that there is already an existing market for this commonly known as hiring an escort, though that service is also associated with possibly not so legal activities. There are also friend apps/meetup groups to find buddies for activities.

    That being said, I do think it aligns somewhat with the goals of being with a cuddler. Other than the physical act of cuddling and making physical contact with another human, cuddling also makes us like we are not alone and that someone is there to simply listen to us, like the rent a man. Like others mentioned, it has the potential to blur the lines even more so I would practice good self-awareness if I wanted to avoid anything non-platonic.

  • MaxCuddleMaxCuddle

    This is a cuddle site. I think it's wierd to offer plus one like an escort service.

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod
    edited February 2022

    @cuddles_ndream

    @CuddleDuncan the question is, how do you feel… You as a person, as an enthusiast , as a client .. -Do You- like the idea of a plus one being offered,

    I answered that in my first post:

    I voted Yes, obviously. Very much in favour.

    It is one of my many sadnesses that the companionship industry is not better known and better used. Traditionally it's been more associated with older people, but as modern society becomes ever more fragmented its appeal has reached all kinds of people.

  • chloe88chloe88

    Won't it be just fun. It could still be platonic and just pure fun. I think as long as both parties have mutual agreement and not crossing boundaries it could still awesome experience.

  • MxSmithMxSmith

    I'm super into this. I've struggled over this past year drawing boundaries around +1 requests, but I think with good boundaries, it could be a really delightful option.

  • waynewvwaynewv

    I really enjoy going out for ice cream and or dinner and then having a cuddle. When doing this with a Pro, so far, the cuddle fee starts with the cuddle not with the dinner/ice cream and I think that is great.
    Of course it would be my treat, I would never expect my cuddlier to pay !!!!!
    My self I don’t see any issue with it here as long as there some cuddle time involved.

  • MxSmithMxSmith

    Ok. So I just added a +1 section to my profile. Can you guys let me know if it sounds good/ makes sense?

  • DaringSprinterDaringSprinter

    When I hear "plus one," I think of a person you bring to a fancy place that has your name on the list, but not theirs.

    As far as activities that aren't cuddling: sure. I mean, playing videogames isn't cuddling. Reading isn't cuddling. Watching a movie isn't cuddling. Neither are walking, eating, talking, listening to music....

    You can do all these things and cuddle too. Unless you don't want to cuddle at all?

  • [Deleted User]KYtransplant (deleted user)

    A lot of it I think depends on who the individual is and your comfort level with them.

    Some people just emotionally drain you. As an introvert I struggle with this a lot. If I had to constantly remind the other individual of my need for advance notice and flexibility as well as boundaries I would find that exhausting.

    I have been very fortunate to find an individual I click with and can work with my erratic schedule as theirs often does the same. We try to meet a few times during the month if schedules line up and time permits. Otherwise, every 4 or 5 weeks we plan an overnight catching up over dinner with everything going on in our lives and then settling in to listen to an audible book while cuddling and falling asleep.

    Some of the books are 10 plus hours long. In the morning we try to figure out what's the last thing we remember so I can reset the chapter for the next time we meet up.

    It is an awesome way to cuddle as both of us are avid readers and often discuss the books we've read or the ones we think we might want to listen to together.

    I don't mind reading aloud either, but that takes away from my ability to kick back and relax while enjoying the book.

  • cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream

    @Sheena123 💯 agree with everything you said

    @xelda i see where you’re coming from completely , I feel that everyone here knows very well that this isn’t a dating / hook up site, & those that are looking for the lines to be blurred are looking for it to be blurred, regardless if they booked someone for 2 hours to go to the museum or booked someone to cuddle for 2 hours.

    @Nature_Lover_ thanks, I share your sentiments

    @MaxCuddle do escort services offer plus 1?
    didn’t think they would

    @chloe88 i agree

    @MxSmith 💯 agree, I just saw your +1 section on your profile & I think its wonderful!

    @waynewv Thanks for sharing, & I’m glad you’ve had some positive experiences already … me I wouldn’t mind if its standalone, like let’s say I want to go indoor skydiving (as an example) , & I have no one to go with, but a pro would do a plus 1 for this, than I wouldn’t mind booking for that hour or 2 (or whatever it is) & Ofcourse I would love cuddles just like anybody else, but I wouldn’t feel like the time for one or the other has to be free, because regardless of which it is (or both) it is still their time, unless it happens to be with an enthusiast.

    @DaringSprinter both, there might be a time when I would like to book a cuddle , or book a plus one to an event or an activity, or both.

    @KYtranspant definitely true, same vetting process & comfort needs to be established with a plus 1 as with cuddling … I wouldn’t expect any pro (or enthusiast) wanting to be a plus 1 for say, hiking in the mountains ⛰ with just that person / or going on a joy ride with that person, and other examples as well unless that trust has been established … I think same rules applies.

    @CuddleDuncan ” I voted Yes, obviously. Very much in favour.” I stand corrected.

  • Libra0Libra0
    edited February 2022

    No, this is a cuddle site. Not a “will you be my friend for a couple of hours, let’s play chess together and drink hot chocolate, or I need a partner for an outing site. Sadly, the spirit has been long gone, and only Exacerbated by the pandemic with video and phone sessions. Physical touch in the form of cuddling is why I signed up, and many other gentlemen. Unfortunately as noted by the numerous topics, it’s next to impossible to find Enthusiasts, so were left with pros. I feel we’re going down a rabbit hole with all these alternates to the actual cuddle ingredient to this site. Change it companion comfort then.

  • cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream

    @Libra0 thanks for your input

  • Nature_Lover_Nature_Lover_

    Found this interesting:

    https://www.quora.com/What-is-the-difference-between-a-companion-an-escort

    @Libra0 I would love to see more active enthusiasts here! I feel like this is such a best kept secret and such a wonderful thing.

    Additional options for connectivity are from what I am gathering only options. I don’t think I have seen a pro who only offers a blended session. I’ve also seen many pros who only offer platonic cuddling and no non cuddle or +1 activities.

  • [Deleted User]KYtransplant (deleted user)
    edited February 2022

    @Nature_Lover_ 15 minutes for ear cleaning?? It didn't take me that long to clean the ears of a 20 year old Shih Tzu tonight when I groomed him. And I had to use needle-nose pliers to get the deep hair out of his ears.

    Damn. Maybe I should step up my game.

    Edit, was trying to figure out the spoiler feature but I'm not good at technology. So it is what it is.

  • BabichevBabichev
    edited February 2022

    This question has been asked in various forms before.

    The focus on the site is platonic cuddling. Since the pandemic, virtual sessions have become a thing. However, we are seeing more and more pros offer other services and it starts to be problematic. Where does one draw the line? Among the things I have seen pros offer are:
    Dinner dates
    Other platonic dates
    Cook dinner for you
    Game night
    Massage with or without essential oils
    Body painting
    Non-professional psychotherapy
    Reiki and other energy work
    Tarot card reading
    Psychic readings
    Travel companion
    Solar panels (I’m not making this up)

    That’s what I can remember off the top of my head.

    We already work really hard at keeping the site focused on platonic cuddling. The fact that some members seek non-platonic activity is problematic for those who are here for platonic cuddling. Many of these activities could easily become a segue into non-platonic activity. The more the lines get blurred, the harder it becomes to keep it focused on platonic cuddling. Personally, I see such an addition as a possible nightmare for moderators who have to handle complaints, suspend untagged pros, and constantly warn and ban people for non-platonic activity.

    If pros start offering non-cuddle activities, I don’t want to have to handle any complaints regarding them. The terms of service are about cuddling, not other activities. Keeping up with the cuddling/virtual sessions is already enough.

  • HogboblinZweiHogboblinZwei
    edited February 2022

    I don't get this. I mean, if you want to interact with people, stare at your neighbors? Go to the park and try to infiltrate a family? Sit at a bar and force yourself into conversations? I dunno. There's countless options for people who need to feel included/a part of something.

    But hey, that's just what I think. The whole "spirit of cuddling" thing seems like a stretch to me. Cuddle Comfort really doesn't need to offer every possible nice thing, and I don't think it should try.

  • cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream

    For those that aren’t in favor and have expressed why, I get a sense that ultimately you don’t want cuddle comfort to move away from its essence, which is cuddling … although I’m still for plus 1, I understand… thank you all for your replies.

  • MxSmithMxSmith

    I wouldn't mind brainstorming about the potential problems that could arise out of +1 services. @Babichev and I have talked about this issue before because there's always somebody asking for something that's not being offered. Its hard enough to manage wants/needs/expectations/boundaries around straighforward just cuddling. If you start adding other things in there it just becomes significantly more complicated and there are a million new ways to have one's boundaries pushed. So far I have said no to plus 1 activities like dinner because of wanting to keep easy boundaries.

    At the same time, it has felt really unfortunate to me sometimes saying no to certain requests because they are simple kind things that I would enjoy and would be easy to do. I'd like to find a way to offer those things in a simple way.

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