I am a left-handed male psychopath. Let’s cuddle.
If that was aimed at me, I'm afraid I'll have to politely decline. I can't see that being a relaxing cuddle for either of us.
@MCcuddles2 it is not trolling. @BuggleBear is making a very serious point. Curiously, the fact that you even entertained the possibility that it was trolling underlines that point.
@BuggleBear It wasn’t aimed at anyone. It was a joke based off all the groups everyone has mentioned. I wouldn’t read too much into it.
I know I have cuddled people with differing opinions. However, if someone let me know some of their beliefs, and those beliefs are seated in hate, prejudice or anti-science then I just can’t. I am not there to cure anyone or change their minds, but I believe cuddling is a type of support and I refuse to support the wicked.
Perhaps on second thought I would cuddle the wicked after saying this:
“The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.”
Of course I would say this while wearing a Samuel L Jackson wig.
you can't make sweeping generalization about people just because they tick one box. That doesn't mean you know them.
You're exactly right in this.
I was just trying to say that our reasons for having preferences should be consistent. The point I'm making is : If it was acceptable to not cuddle men because of a generalization about the group, as it seemed to be based on another thread (and this view didn't seem to be challenged), then in order to be consistent, it should also be acceptable to not cuddle a psychopath also based on a generalization about the group.
But since you mentioned:
So why do we still cut psychopaths less slack than men?
Our premise isn't the same, then, as I didn't notice anyone in that thread challenge the view to exclude men from cuddling but I did notice in this thread a challenge to someone who wanted to exclude psychopaths from cuddling.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but the point you're trying to make is that people with mental illnesses are unfairly judged, based on misinformation (portrayal in media) and generalizations. I will agree with you on that for sure.
It wasn’t aimed at anyone. It was a joke based off all the groups everyone has mentioned. I wouldn’t read too much into it.
That's fortuitous then 😁
Our premise isn't the same, then
Evidently not, no.
I feel I've made my point very clearly, several times now, and if people still don't understand then I'm not sure what else I can say.
😂😂😂😂😂😂I’m dieing… I can’t. Lol thank u all… I needed that
I'm glad you find stigma and social issues around mental illness so funny.
.
On the subject of mental health and cuddling: a person being neurodivergent would not dissuade me from cuddling them—I feel like that would be cruel, as well as hypocritical. I'd be willing to learn about what affects them, too.
For me, it's all about a person's convictions. I'd have zero issues cuddling with an individual who has been diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder (for instance). But, if they suddenly started talking about astrology, I'd leave immediately.
For me, there are many different things that can replace astrology in the above example. Racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, science denial, excessive optimism, spiritualism, being super into memes, patriotism/nationalism, a fondness for the band Smash Mouth, religiosity, uncritical adherence to empty traditions, quantum mysticism, preferring Squirtle or Charmander to Bulbasaur, and numerous others.
My willingness to understand others extends to things that they couldn't choose about themselves—not every idea that could float around in their head.
@BuggleBear
upon further reading of your posts, I don't think you are trolling and I understand the point you are trying to make.
I don't particularly care if you do think I am 'trolling'. I've made my point, and if you have read everything I have put and still think it is a joke or a wind up, or indeed that I would 'troll' about something as important as mental health issues, then it says a lot more about you than it ever could about me. The same goes for anyone else who feels like making a disparaging remark about my seriousness on the topic.
Upon further consideration, I would cuddle with a vampire or cultist or drug addict more than once—if they showed every sign of never allowing the harmful parts of themselves to hurt me (whether they personally thought those bits were harmful or not).
#Not all vampires, after all.
The most important thing to me is my comfort with them during my cuddle. Most I don't mind if people have different views. Only ones that would matter to me are ones fueled by hate or show a person having a terrible mentality. Things like different hobbies, culture, religion, life experience I don't mind are different and in a good cuddle session I could learn with and share my own thoughts as well.
Only if it’s an actively harmful belief. Or one that’s antithetical to my values.
Yes. As long as we agree on consent in all matters, I don’t care what that person believes. It’s unhealthy to surround ourselves only with those we agree. It’s why we have become to polarized and extreme these days. Hangout with people who are and think differently. Might learn something new.
@TheMidnightOwl when you go to the movie theaters & buy popcorn 🍿, do you leave it as it is … or do you add more salt & butter?
@cuddles_ndream
I never buy anything from concessions unless I’m getting a huge discount or free bag/soda refill or something. But now that I learned the drizzling “butter” is really just a vegetable oil (I think soybean is what my cousin who worked at a theatre told me) I don’t add it. If there’s the flavored powder stuff to sprinkle on top I will add the ranch flavor. And put it into a tray first to evenly distribute. I also don’t go to movies much anymore in general. Can count on one hand the theatre visits I’ve made since returning to college 6 years ago and typically since I had free passes.
Why the random question?
@TheMidnightOwl you know what’s crazy? … I just popped popcorn like an hour ago & I decided to look at the the ingredient list, & I was surprised to learn that palm oil was the second main ingredient, not butter ….
I was just curious because I remember you mentioning a while ago that you buy the plain kernels so that you can control the salt & butter content yourself (ever since I read that I feel like my Kirkland popcorn is too salty & buttery - thanks 😬 lol 😆
It was just me being random & curious.
Oh. Lol Yeah. I’m still trying to get a process down pat for making the kernels in my instant pot since I don’t have a stovetop. I have a whole jar of unpopped kernels I want to give a second chance. Now I want popcorn at 2am.
@TheMidnightOwl you should definitely make it right now at 2am (I’m usually not a bad influence 😜😝 lol 😂)
A lot of my best friends see things very differently than I do!!! I get so upset when people hate other people just because they don’t think the same way!!! If a person can’t cuddle with someone over a difference in opinion then I think that person may be the problem! The only time I can see there being an issue is if the person is being consistently rude or disrespectful in some way about the difference. But not simply because a difference in general.
@malogy I think it depends on the difference. There are a lot of issues where a person's views can be seen as destructive -- for example, I would not want to cuddle with someone who supported what happened on January 6th. Trust and respect are key to this experience, and I couldn't trust or respect someone like that.
I try to keep political or touchy issues away from the cuddle experience but if a cuddler was making it their mission to let it be known that they only see women as a piece of meat or someone who should be bare foot and pregnant in the kitchen and only speak when spoken to, I couldn’t possibly feel comfortable enough to cuddle. You can have differences of opinion in any topic but if you want to pick a fight, that’s obviously opposite of what relaxation is to me.
Yes.
@WriterGF I see what you’re saying! I think people are very complicated. I think Sheena is right in that those kind of dividing touching topics shouldn’t even be brought to the table. If I go to cuddle I just want to enjoy a movie together or just simply relax together. Those kind of topics can quickly change that mood. Getting off topic lol I think with how complicated people are, you can’t brush with broad strokes. What’s the heart behind why a person thinks what they think? If it’s hate, I can see why there’s a problem!
@WriterGF Exactly! If someone believes in racist views, illegal views such as what you presented, sexist views, anti-science propaganda or any other bigoted trash then I support anyone’s decision not to cuddle said bigot. To me it is the same as saying “You perpetuate hate, but that’s ok. You have a place of comfort here.” What about the people they are bigoted against. Hate is efficiently eradicated when the hateful are ostracized. Let them see how their hatred works for them as a lifestyle in their cocoon of hatred.
@FunCartel: Yeah.... "Your beliefs harm people, but you're still a person and I'm not in any immediate danger from you, so I'm willing to help you meet a basic human need" isn't a thing everybody can say.
In my experience, ostracism results in cultishly tight-knit groups that band together against the outside world: cocoons of hate that produce, uh, explosive butterflies. Careful reintegration is tough, but ultimately more effective. Isolate them from each other by surrounding them with normal people—that usually works a treat.
Or at least expose them to normalcy. Let them see it's their beliefs that aren't wanted, not them. If you can. If you want to. It's not for everybody.
Your safety and comfort come first.