They should just call it a pro site. That's what it has become, de facto. It would be nice if there were an alternative site where people just cuddled because they enjoy it, without the monetization.
@MrMarkAndrew There is, but it’ll cost you.
@MrMarkAndrew - CC is a site for enthusiasts, Pros, and respective clients - not JUST for Pros. CC began as an enthusiast-only site, and has grown to include Pros. The community here of enthusiasts, Pros, and clients, is what weaves the fabric of this space.
Do you want to bash Pros or clients who do want to hire Pros? Full stop and full nope.
Don't want to hire a Pro? That's your choice. Want to find a fellow enthusiast? You have that option, and we wish you well on your cuddle adventures. Search and filters are your friend.
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@MrMarkAndrew ~ Not to bag on you personally, but every time I see a comment like yours I get upset. I'm an enthusiast, I'm a female, and I don't have it easy here either. But I do get to meet amazing people, sometimes even in real life, and get to celebrate the cuddles that happen between us ~ typically more than once!!
I don't know if your hope is that one of us will drop you a, "there, there, it's gonna be okay... let's meet for snuggles" message, but it wouldn't be me. Rarely will anyone's sob story, let alone their vibe of contempt, move me to reach out to them to offer what their whining about.
The forums are full of advice, and one piece that comes up over and over is to keep in mind that potential partners may read up on you as a way of vetting. So not being a genuinely enthusiastic enthusiast is not likely to get you, or those with your outlook, very far. Nor will kvetching about the existence of pros.
IMNSHO... 🤷♀️
@cuddles_ndream, that sounds like a person who was trying to set you up for something besides cuddling. Like robbing you or something like that. You could reverse image search her pictures and see what comes up. If you have her last name you may be able to look on the NY state board of nursing website and see if she's actually a nurse.
My best friend is a former sex worker and she's got a laundry list of safety rules for meeting up with strangers. One of them is no last minute change of plans. I'm a little scared just thinking about what might have happened if you had gone to the 6 am "cuddle".
When I joined I read the forums, site rules to get educated, saw the disparity of the sexes, 30 men to 1 women, and started on my journey to level my odd, I started with a pro to understand what this is, I am fortunate to have received positive Karma that I earned by being there, present, communicating and making her feel comfortable. I was always taught sometimes you have to knock on 100 doors before even one will open for you, learned that back In the day selling home improvement. I started rapport with people and built friendships, had amazing experiences with pros and enthusiasts the like, met with over 30 enthusiasts to date and most are still here on the site, you have to be patient, kind, present and look to be there for the person you cuddle, to nurture any relationship requires time and communication, mitigate expectations, boundaries, and consent. I'm a regular guy, not rich, not poor, sometimes it does make sense to pay for convenience, for me there is a cost vs benefit, after a certain amount of money, the cost outweighs the benefit, its different for everyone. My fastest set-up of a cuddle is 12 minutes with a non-pro, I messaged her, she messaged me back, we exchanged numbers and I started driving in her direction, within 12 minutes we were in each others arms and cuddled for 6 hours and every time she passes through NY we cuddle, sometimes persistence is rewarded😊 , there is no instant gratification here, your rewarded by being present, respectful, holding space for others as you would want space held for you, good luck in your efforts, hang in there, be you, be real, be well, Positivity will take you far, I'm blessed to be part of this community, hope you find cuddle comfort here. Happybear 🤗
@MrMarkAndrew
They should just call it a pro site. That's what it has become, de facto.
That's simply not true. The forum is alive with enthusiasts, many of them women. I have cuddled in person with a number of enthusiast women, cuddled virtually with several more, and chatted to I have no idea how many. And while my experience is not the norm, it's not unique either.
Your profile has one photo and two lines of text. You want to cuddle enthusiast women? Well then do the the work. I don't like to be unsympathetic - you need a cuddle - but dissing the site when you haven't given it a chance isn't going to get you anywhere, with the possible exception of a trip to Suspensionville.
I can't believe you haven't seen this already, but just in case not .....
You've done all the hard bits - the first photo, the first line of text, the first Karma. Now just finish the job.
@happybear I’m literally impressed at your karmas & reviews!
@cuddles_ndream Ty, I like your profile, like the imagery of your pictures karma, and have some of the same friends too, we are local to one another, glad your part of this community, if you'd ever like to chat, feel free to reach out
@happybear that was a very nice testimony on your experience here - thanks!
@happybear thank you! i noticed right away we have people in common, & I’m really glad we’re local to each other, ty for your kind soul! I will be more than happy to reach out to you
@Maverick07 Ty for saying that, it means alot to me, ive had good experiemces and bad, here, learned from both, made some good friends here that I hope to cuddle with still when we are old 😊 .
@cuddles_ndream Look forward to it.
The PROOOOBLEM that I see here is that females rules when it come to this, there is so few of them and a great level of demand that they are assured a partner as soon as they want. Also, they can easily make money while at the same time satisfying their need for touch that for many of them it does not make complete sense to become an enthusiast when they can easily become a professional, earn money while at the same time satisfying their basic touch needs, why do it for free when they can earn money doing it?
This is what I think and what perfectly explains why a men in here will be hard pressed to find an enthusast women that is willing to cuddle with them for free, again, why cuddle with a men for free when you can cuddle with them and charge them as easily as cuddling them for free?
What I did?
When I initially became a member here, I had set my profile to cuddle only women, I quickly changed it to everyone as it apparently became very clear to me that I was not going to cuddle a women unless I was willing to pay for a pro. Since this is not a sexual encounter and it is purely platonic, who cares of the other cuddler's gender when it comes to cuddling? When every men in cuddlecomfort understands that the gender of the other person doesn't really matter, everything here will quickly equalize and the "scarcity" of the cuddler that it is perceived here will quickly vanish.
The basic need of platonic touch and cuddling can be satisfied by any gender. I say, everyone switch to everyone and sourcing an enthusiast shouldn't be a problem anymore.
@InvestorLogic, you're not wrong about men cuddling men, but there's also nothing wrong with women having power. If that bothers you, please ask yourself why.
@Cuddle_RN great response 😊
Also…
@InvestorLogic not everyone will agree with your point that finding a female enthusiast is a problem here . Also you really simplify being a professional here. Being a pro is “easy?” I disagree with those comments.
The PROOOOBLEM
I can almost hear the whine. Problems are seldom one-sided. Since we can't control other people's behavior, focusing on our own part of the problem is often a more effective strategy.
It doesn't always work, but sometimes others will respond positively when they see us making changes ourselves.
@Cuddle_RN @OhioMike @JoyfulHeart Yep!
Thirty years ago, when everyone was on AOL, if a woman walked into a chat room, 40 guys dove on her like a loose football ( (and she would understandably flee). It's no different now. There will always be way more men than women on any social site. If you want a woman's attention, you need to put real thought into your profile, your messages, all of it. You need to find a way to stand out because you are one of a big crowd. Anyone not up for that needs to find another way to meet people, because those are the facts of life.
@WriterGF everything you said and this is also why clubs have "Ladies Night" and there's a song that says "my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard". 🤷♀️
@MrMarkAndrew ultimately all women will cost you money lol
@Morpheus, if that's such a problem, why do men still want our company?
@Cuddle_RN I never said it was a problem
There are women enthusiasts active on this site. I know because I’m one of them.
One of the nice things about the forums is that you get to know people. Even if they are out of town, you never know when you might cross paths. When I finally met someone from the forums after getting to know them for a couple of years through online discussions, we were already friends and there was no awkwardness at all upon meeting. There are a number of guys on here I’d cuddle in a heartbeat if we’re ever in the same geographical space.
And there are others I’ve gotten to know well enough that I’d probably pass.
You never know. Your next cuddle buddy could be reading the comment you’re writing right now.
Fortunate are those who find cuddles through a local search and fortunate am I to have been found that way...
But finding each other through the forums, building our connections over time and, getting to travel to meet for multi-day snuggle-fun-fests, are the ones I feel most fortunate for and [so far] are the ones I consider to be kindred forever friends with the likely bonus of cuddles when we're together next.
So yeah, be real/be you and keep in mind:
"You never know. Your next cuddle buddy could be reading the comment you’re writing right now." ~ @Babichev
Sooooo true!!!
@Babichev @quixotic_life amen to that, I couldn't agree more!
From what I was told by a female on the site, if you're a female and are on here the website messages you and encourages you to sign up to be a pro. And really if you're a woman you probably get tons of message and like to cuddle so why would you not want to get paid for it if you're going to do it anyway? So that explain the lack of non-pro females, in my experience a pro always gets back to you and guessing any non-pro probably has so many messages from weird dudes they get sick of reading them all.
No, @dpl - This is categorically not true. CC does NOT message female enthusiastists, encouraging them to sign up to be a Pro. [-Sid]
The vast majority of Cuddlers are woman, hands down. Men are generally the ones in need to be cuddled and touched. With so many men looking for affection, I will assume that the demand is huge and the ladies can’t keep up.
Many clients and very little stores to shop, much less opened to accept men that easily. The ladies have to be selective and very careful to weed out those men with other intentions.
So the ladies will take more time to accept male clients. It’s safety pretty much.
Hope this helps!
@frace95 When you look at the numbers by active users (last online a week ago. I don't seem to get any responses from any other last online filters), the ratio seems closer to 7:1. Atleast in my area and a couple other areas I looked at. I haven't seen a woman's inbox, so I don't know what the ratio would be when you remove the creeps. Then, even after you remove the creeps, you get the lazy members with no profile who send one liners. If you remove those people too, I'm not sure what the ratio is. One would think that having a filled out profile with pictures and a substantial response would make you really stand out, and I'm sure it does somewhat, but not as much as I was expecting. There was a post somewhere from a female enthusiast that said that she only felt a encouraged by about 4% of messages she received. She described these small number of messages as thoughtful and genuine. A male enthusiast should aspire to craft messages like these if they hope to have success on this site, I suppose. (I wish us guys would get tons of messages too, but this is not how the world works.)
@MrMarkAndrew @samfiddle
I get it, it is very difficult as an average guy looking to cuddle women on this website (not that women don't also have it hard @quixotic_life, or that all women everywhere are inundated with quality prospects) . In general, it is hard for average guys to get any sort of affection from women anywhere, really. So the fact that it's not easy on this website either isn't too surprising.
In fact, it is probably made harder from too many options (analysis paralysis) and the hesitation that comes with meeting a stranger from the internet. I've been informed that many women have dealt with creepy and violent men. Past the safety part, with so many options, they will be incentivized to go with those that they have the highest quality connection with. Our time is limited, so we will all try to maximize our enjoyment when and where possible. For a touch-starved guy, this might mean cuddling with almost any woman in his area, but for a woman it's more likely to be a guy that she feels the strongest connection with and feels safe with (there are enthusiasts that have many cuddle partners but those profiles seem less common).
As @cuddle_duncan points out, working on your ability to connect with others online will help your chances, but your mileage may vary.
I suspect that even if there were no professionals on this website, things wouldn't change much for male enthusiasts looking to cuddle female enthusiasts, because the above would still apply and it seems that there are a good proportion of so called professionals that are pretty selective anyway even with charging. There are many fantastic professionals at the same time, can't say enough good about them.