I just want peace and quiet and for all people to stop harming one another. A kind, trauma-informed husband would be lovely, too.
I wish for things my parents would hate.
I wish no parent or guardian ever believed that a person who doesn't beat their child hates the kid.
I wish no one had ever been taught that beating kids saves them from a fate worse than death.
I want to live in a world where "what kid has a dad who doesn't hurt them as a form of correction?" was never a rhetorical question with the answer "no kid, or only an unloved one."
I wish no child was ever raised to believe their body belonged to someone else, and they themselves didn't get to decide what they did and didn't want done to—and with—their own bodies.
I wish no kid was ever taught to give up on making sense of what they're told, and just accept it instead.
I wish no child was ever told they weren't good enough to deserve anything but pain.
I wish no child was ever brought up to believe that they were a slave and had only the "freedom" to pick one of two masters (at least one of whom is always watching, always listening, never leaves you alone, inescapable—and will judge you for everything).
I wish no child was taught that their thoughts can be seen, that thought is as bad as action, that even their thoughts have to obey their master.
I wish no child was ever abused.
@HogboblinZwei
...You're right. You're far too right. I guess the only real difference is that the second person legitimately believes you'll die (and worse) without what they're pushing.
I remember having that belief. Pointing out how harmful it and the actions it inspires are is not mockery of a person!
Note, please, that everything I'm wishing wasn't so is a thing that I experienced as a child. These are not hypotheticals. Thank you.
@DaringSprinter ~ 🫂🫂🫂 ~ same.
@DaringSprinter “Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.” - C.S. Lewis
I don’t know when Lewis wrote those words. He died in 1963 and that quote is from a collection of previously unpublished essays that were published in 1970. Regardless of when he wrote these words, I regard them as “eternal truths”.
It is impossible to calculate the damage and suffering caused by people who, in their own minds, are just “doing the right thing” or “just following orders.”
My simple asks 1. To live to the age of 500 outliving my children so I can watch over and protect them and their offspring for as long as I possibly can.
To be financially stable enough to support myself and my family on my own
To find someone I can trust to spend my free time with just for me Mommy's personal cuddle buddy.
@JohnR1972: I read that quote for the first time with a head full of harmful beliefs, and didn't see the irony in my instant agreement until years later.
It's a good quote—as true now as it was whenever Lewis wrote it.
To live to the age of 500 outliving my children.
Are you sure? Because outliving your child, having their life cut short long before it is their time to go, is absolute agony. World- imploding, soul destroying, can't breathe, can't think, can't sleep agony. A parent should never have to watch their child die. A parent should never outlive their child, however pure their intentions are for wanting that.
@BuggleBear ...umm having their life cut short long before it's time? I figured they'd probably live many long years before I hit 500 hopefully . If somehow I can find a way to live till then by some rare chance I'd be honored to be present for every moment no matter how dark.
I'm with @cuddles_ndream on the alarm wish...or should I say, lack of alarm wish...I'd love to not need an alarm... Either because I have no where to be/responsibilities to get up for...or just that I have perfect internal clock and can get up without work/stress when I need to get up. I stress so hard when I have to wake up early, like for an entire week before I even have to, knowing I will. And every morning, I snooze every 5-10 minutes for an hour. Terrible way to wake up. every. day.
That's it, I think if I solve that above wish, the rest will fall in place.
Good luck to everyone with your wishes/hopes/dreams/plans
@entwine 🥂
Just like you, I’m part of the snooze button life 😴 …. I purposely set my alarm Atleast 1 hour before I have to be up during my work week because I know I’m hitting the snooze button 3-4 times.
The other day me & my co-workers were bored & started asking each other, what’s the 1st thing you would do if you won the mega or powerball. Some people mentioned they would tell their significant other / family , others said they would buy a yacht 🛥 😂, someone else said they will make a huge billboard across the street from our place of work that says “%^^%% I quit” lololol … and me I’m like the very 1st thing I would do before anything is remove all the alarm clocks on my phone & any physical alarm clocks ⏰ I may have, there’s nothing more I would value than owning my own time, sleeping when I’m actually sleepy, waking up when I actually wake up …. Not ‘having’ to be somewhere, but wanting to be somewhere. I genuinely hope the universe arranges this for us.
@Rain567 then this is obviously something that has never happened to you.
@BuggleBear I'm sorry . I may not totally understand what you're trying to relay to me . I would like to. Also I hope I didn't offend you somehow . Definitely was not my intent .If I have somehow I apologize .
@Rain567 it's OK, you didn't know.
@InsaneZane There's at least one episode of Big Bang Theory, where characters try to melt each-other's brain with the double-finger-death-zap. Your post brings that to mind. (grinning) Peace.
@BuggleBear I'm sorry. Truly. I just caught on . I won't pry. I stand by my wish to always be present to keep an eye on my children forever if possible . But I'm sorry that my post brought up any pain for you. I can't express the emotion's welling up through my typed words . I'll be sure to be more considerate next time .
@quixotic_life small, incremental change and improvement helps me to be more patient. When things just don't feel fair, or easy, remind yourself of all the change and resistance you've already gotten through. May you be blessed with solid folks on which to build your chosen-family. The people you choose will appreciate you, and will appreciate being chosen. Peace.
@Gallowglass ~ I'm not sure what drew that out of you for me, but I really appreciate it. Thank you 💓
To not worry so much, particularly about things I cannot control. To sleep through the night & feel rested on waking. To be able to read a physical book for more than five minutes at a time. To have friends that live in the same city again especially those that like to cuddle platonically.
@Rain567 ❤️
@BuggleBear ❤️❤️❤️
@DaringSprinter To go back on my own words, I wish those awful things hadn't happened to you. I do hope that you can make peace inside yourself. Earlier you wished for healthcare that was affordable. Here is a situation that shows little is learned by wishing. Sure, we could legislate more money be shoved towards health provision, and then we eventually would learn that's not enough. We might learn that a sizable chunk of our economy rides on the combination of government and consumers forking over tons of money, and that the healthcare sector is monstrously overbuilt. So I was saying so grumpily earlier, that wishing is useless, and it is worse than useless when our wishes get responded to with indulgence such as more money towards healthcare. What we need is to be able to feel economic signals that we can respond to, rather than passively receiving more and more expensive care provided by entities paid by people we don't even know. Wishing teaches one nothing.
@UCpaaHVg6u0: Wishing doesn't teach us much, it's true. But speaking as someone who had an upbringing meant to crush all wishes, hopes, and dreams out of me (and I paraphrase: "The Lord gives and the Lord takes away; blessed be the name of the Lord! God is in control, and you need to accept that. What are your desires? Give them up. Give them to God. He will provide.") ...I have trouble wishing.
Just figuring out what I want is a struggle. You'd think "affordable healthcare" would be a gimme for someone in constant pain, right? But nah. Suffering's a good thing (I say sarcastically). When you bear it with faith and a good attitude, it brings glory to God.
The simple act of wishing—of feeling a desire and, instead of suppressing it by focusing on something else, focusing on the desire, drawing it out, putting it into words—it teaches me things. About myself. About the parts of myself I was denied. About what, hey, I'm not getting! and how did I not notice that before? It's not much, probably, from a normal point of view. But it's something... and it's more knowledge than I had before.
That's what I mean when I say it's worth putting a wish into words.
@DaringSprinter I agree
@JoyfulHeart: Though it may not be very useful in the world outside one's own head! Still, it's something. A small (but necessary) first step.
And thank you.
To the nay sayers,
If it weren't for my hopes and dreams and wishes, I wouldn't still be among the living...
I'd poured myself into the words on the page, and made a deal that if it burned through I'd follow through. Then to see the paper catch and the flame move in a wave across the crinkled plain, I realized what I'd done. I thought my heart was low, until that moment when it plummeted into the bleakest of depths from knowing it's over.
But like the pinprick of light when resurfacing, came an agonizing shred of hope that even the slightest bit of paper would remain. When the embers dulled and the smoke cleared, I desperately searched the ashes, then I saw it through my tears... smaller than a child's pinky nail, but there it was... the tiniest bit of white paper with scorched edges all the way around, that had somehow made it through. Foolish as it may seem, that piece of paper and the investment I had in the results of it burning is why I'm still here.
So don't tell me wishes, hopes and dreams are useless because I know with every fiber of my being, that as far as I'm concerned, you're wrong. And I'm sorry you don't understand the power such a thing can have in getting people through the darkest of times. Should you ever be there yourself, I wish for you the resilience that comes from having hope.
@quixotic_life
an agonizing shred of hope
Yes, shreds of hope can be agonizing. I know that you know that I know what you mean.
I really do @JoyfulHeart ~ 🥲💓 And thank you.
@quixotic_life @DaringSprinter so much of this resonates with me this week.
I wish my body would not hold onto trauma anniversaries. I'm still trying to figure out good resources for this.
I've planned for a short week at work and have cuddles and self-care lined up for the weekend.
I just want to wake up and find that this is all just some horrible nightmare, and my cousin didn't really die. But I know that won't happen, so I'll settle for healing the all consuming pain I feel.
(Edited: I thought better about my hilarious joke and removed it. Happy posting everyone!)