So I graduated in May with a bachelor of arts, with an emphatic study in philosophy.
My question is a philosophical one...
I understand the term platonic in that all of this is aimed at higher goods (true friendship, contemplation of the forms, etc), (and maybe this is a self-directed question more than anything else) but I'm wondering if it is possible for cuddling to have its end in non physical good.
Though there is certainly something good about it and there can be a lot of healthy results and healing that come from cuddling and physical affection, I think that depends on the intentions and/or the relationship of the cuddlers.
If they're two people meeting online and only then in person, merely for the sake of physical and emotional comfort (among other things), is it possible to form such a relationship?
I suppose a lot of this varies with the intentions of each person here as I said, but does anyone have some serious philosophical responses in opposition to or consistent with this POV? I'd love to hear (read) them!
Thanks and thank you in advance for your open and honest answers and opinions! Hope all have a good and blessed Christmas and holiday season, blessed with many beloved and loving friends and family!
Greetings and thank you for the post! I can only speak for myself and give my views, opinions, and experiences so please keep that in mind.
I do believe that if the intention of both people is to form a platonic friendship of cuddling, talking, and spending time together with the known limit to both that nothing will go any further than this, it can work out well. Regardless if it's 2 non-Pros, a non-Pro and a Pro, or 2 Pros (if that's a thing)... having those clear boundaries set up and understood by both people can allow for both to benefit and neither have those overthinking thoughts "she did this", "he did that", "she took and held my hand", "he said this" and one or both go into a tailspin of searching for deeper meaning to every little word or action. With both people entirely on the same page on what "this" is and no other intentions, both people are free to enjoy the others company, friendship, and intimacy of being able to open up to someone.
For me I've been taking a break, a long break from even dating that I've even considering staying with for good, but I still want and enjoy being able to have someone to go to every so often to cuddle up with, talk and debate about various topics, maybe fall asleep beside them or wrapped up together, and have those intimate moments with someone that you vibe well with yet keep it as they are without crossing into things you'd do within an exclusive relationship... to be closer to someone than I can with most friends or acquaintances without it having to be something more than a deeper friendship.
If one person goes into the session with even a small hope of it becoming something more though, it can lead to a disaster for both people as one may develop feelings for the other and the other person thinks they will be staying as a platonic friendship. That can mean the loss of someone you thought wanted only a cuddle partner like you and they ended up wanting more, ruining it for both of you. On the other hand, if something more does grow between two platonic friends it could be something great.. a best friend and lover with a deeper type of thing, but those you don't see too often where 2 platonic friends became something more. The down side is if the relationship fails then both sides are hit hard in losing a relationship and a friendship with a lot of mental questions that can cause a lot of damage questioning the entire thing from the start.
I'll keep from rambling, but can say from personal experience that I've been through each of them on both sides of the situation and find that at least here, using this site, it's made it a lot easier to be clear that the person you're meeting up with or paying for their time, the expectation of only a platonic friendship seems a lot easier.. that this isn't a dating or hook up site and that makes a large difference.
I think being open and honest with your intentions and holding strong to boundaries is the key to keeping a platonic relationship platonic. When I say boundaries, I don't just mean where you can and can't put your hands or no kissing, etc. I mean boundaries in regards to not crossing the line that you have both established. I have had to end wonderful cuddle relationships because they had developed deep, romantic feelings for me. Ethically and morally, I cannot take money for cuddling when the other person feels that way. I feel like I am taking advantage of a person in a weakened state by taking money from someone that just wants to spend time with me. At that point, it's not about cuddling, it's about deep seeded feelings and I just won't take part it hurting someone like that.
Again, boundaries are what is established and agreed upon by the two individuals (barring any Code of Conduct restrictions imposed by a website or organization). I personally advertised on Craigslist for a personal cuddler. A cuddler to cuddle the cuddler, you could say. I listed EVERYTHING that I was looking for and basically conducted interviews. I found my perfect cuddle partner. One of my requirements was that he was a giver during cuddling. As a pro, as much as I love cuddling, I am always "on" during the sessions. The sessions are very much about my partner. I wanted someone that was there 100% for me. I found that. I intentionally looked off of this site because I wanted the boundaries that I wanted, which may not be what is allowable on Cuddle Comfort. It's never gone past platonic but I wanted that option to be available to me. Again, it's about communication and sticking to set boundaries. We each know EXACTLY what's expected and allowed.
I'm not sure how "philosophical" this response was but I hope it was at least helpful.
Thank you both for your honest answers! I think I would much agree with these!
My response not posting??