Why does everyone have 5 star reviews??

[Deleted User]Safespace111 (deleted user)
edited May 2023 in General

Hi yall,
I am rather new to the cuddling world but was wondering why everyone I see that has 5 star karma reviews and not below that?
After talking to a few cuddlers, it seems to me that most people only write reviews if it was a fantastic experience. A lot of people I talk to say they don't write reviews for just "ok" experiences or even bad experiences. I think it is very important to write reviews for every person I cuddle with, regardless of if it was an excellent experience because how else will people know how the guys (or gals) really are?
I think that very transparent and honest karma reviews are very important because how else are we professional cuddlers supposed to vet the non-professional cuddlers?
I just gave my first 3 star review because I felt it was necessary. Although I do fear I have maybe lost him as a client, I didn't really want to keep him on as one either.
Professionals should know my experience so that they can make a well-informed decision, when choosing to cuddle with this person.
How else are we going to protect each other?
Thoughts? Ideas? Remarks?? What karma reviews do you post and why?

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Comments

  • Harper2000Harper2000

    I totally agree. I think "Karma" and reviews on this site have very little information value. They seem either solicited, fake or heavily skewed to reflect only positive experiences. I don' have any ideas other than for people to do the obvious, which is to actually leave unbiased reviews.

  • [Deleted User]Safespace111 (deleted user)

    Is there any way of leaving karma reviews anonymously? This is a question for cuddlecomfort staff

  • [Deleted User]WriterGF (deleted user)

    What I have heard is that often people don't want to leave less than positive reviews because of the fear the other person will do the same. Especially if you don't have a lot of karma, one bad review can do a lot of damage to your prospects here.

  • [Deleted User]Safespace111 (deleted user)

    I suspect that some people report inappropriate behavior instead of using the karma reviews for them.

  • RezzRezz
    edited May 2023

    @Healwithme1422

    Please keep writing accurate reviews. You could be saving someone else from harm.

    Some fear losing a "client" and will leave glowing reviews to keep them and to receive karma in return. Never trust a strangers karma over your screening process.

    Quality over quantity. Always. I encourage pros to reach out to other pros directly to ask questions about their experience.

    Thank you for being honest, it helps keep this place a bit safer.

  • KozyKimKozyKim

    I think one of the problems is that if someone leaves a three star they’ll just leave you a three star back and say bad things about you even if it’s not to.

  • [Deleted User]Safespace111 (deleted user)

    Yes, I agree with WriterGF, but if you have a bad review then clearly you didn't do something right or follow the rules or something. Why else would you get a bad review?

  • UREverythingUREverything

    Everyone?

  • [Deleted User]WriterGF (deleted user)

    There have been instances of clients leaving pros bad reviews when the client ignored boundaries and got called out for it. Then the pro has to work through the site to get the "revenge karma" removed.

  • MorpheusMorpheus

    I’ve seen plenty of karma under 5 stars. Those people generally don’t last very long.

  • [Deleted User]Safespace111 (deleted user)

    I think what needs to happen is that the professional cuddlers need to be able to inform each other about their experiences with their clients in order to foster a safer experience, without fear of retaliation from non-professoinals.

    I feel like there should be a section on every client's profile that is only visible to professionals to show "private" reviews in case they don't want their clients to see their review, out of fear of retaliation.

    Or, maybe the solution could be that the client should not be able to see the professionals karma review until they have posted a karma review of the professional, themselves.

    Can these reviews be "locked in?" To avoid people changing reviews once they are able to see the reviews from professionals?

    Is it possible to report/dispute any dishonest reviews from non-professionals if retaliation or a dishonest review occurs?

  • sunnysideupsunnysideup

    People are afraid of retaliatory karma. If someone did something criminal, they would just get reported and banned instead of getting negative karma (but they also might get 1 star).

    I pretty much don’t see 2-4 star reviews because of the reasons above I think. If a cuddle was just okay and they left 3 stars, that other person might also give them 3 stars as well so that person will just choose to not give. Any karma. Because leaving 5 stars would be a lie.

  • SuzyqcuddleSuzyqcuddle

    Honestly I think karma is not always helpful. I have had some of my worst cuddles with people with tons of karma. They think they can do whatever they want just because they have a ton of karma! It really bottles my mind how they even got any! I have had some of my best cuddles with people with no karma and have been on the site for years, but I understand because I wouldn't want to share them either lol

  • hikikomorichanhikikomorichan

    Karma reviews are probably done both as an appeal to emotion and a result of emotional bias.
    A reasoned review requires detachment from such emotion.
    Mindfull meditation can help you think critically about your experience.
    It has helped me a lot when I needed to think more than feel, especially where negative emotions would cause yet another failure.
    Hikikimori may be very monastic in nature but they go in the opposite direction of most Buddhists, since they are more likely to have read Schopenhauer first and come to the same conclusions as Cioran.

    This is why a Hikikomori would differ from the Buddha that it is better to come back as a tree and strive for non-existance than to reach enlightenment and nirvana.
    Both ends result in the absence of pleasure and suffering.

  • CuddleWhoCuddleWho
    edited May 2023

    Suppose I cuddle with you and you seem like a nice person, but I didn't really enjoy the cuddle very much and I don't plan to book again.

    I don't want to hurt your future prospects and make it harder for you to get cuddles in the future. Just because I didn't have a great time with you doesn't mean nobody else will. So I'll either leave a 5 star review or no review at all.

    Or, to put it another way: I am simply not going to publicly post negative comments about someone I know personally, unless they crossed a line or did something egregiously bad. Maybe you feel comfortable doing that, but I don't, and I don't think most people do.

  • xandriarainxandriarain

    As a pro I look at clients in more pass or fail type of way. If they showed up, paid me and were respectful they get five stars. If they were disrespectful in some way but didn’t blatantly violate my code of conduct I will just not leave them a karma because its not worth the drama or a retaliation karma. If they were clearly a dangerous person or not respectful of the boundaries I will report them but usually I figure this out in my vetting process.

    Sometimes two people just don’t mesh and its no ones fault but leaving each other 5- star karma despite having a 3- star experience helps each party attract new and better suited cuddlers. There is no need to hurt someone’s buissness or reputation just because the session was lackluster. As long as each party shows up and fulfills their end of the agreement I don’t see the point in trying to drag the other one down. Most people are inherently selfish and only leave karma so they can get one back even if it’s not a verbalized agreement. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s just the way the world works.

    Outside of Cuddling I generally only leave Google reviews if I either want to help support a business or if I want to warn the public about the business because my experience was very awful. I don’t feel as compelled to write reviews about mediocre experiences.

  • [Deleted User]delicatesoul (deleted user)

    @xandriarain Well said! Completely agree

  • hikikomorichanhikikomorichan

    I don't really have time to write reviews positive or negative, I have more utilitarian needs to tend to.
    If I value the company of someone I would rather tell them in person or at best on the phone than writing something down.
    And I'm a person who hates phone calls, in general.
    there are the occasional few who I actually enjoy talking to on the phone but probably because the conversation is of intellectual value to us both.
    If someone is calling to say that a shipment is canceled or delayed, just send me an email and leave me alone.
    cellphones were a mistake imho. email can do more than SMS can for less of the cost.
    the only reason people like SMS because it's instantaneous, however email has evolved since the early days of arpanet where you could catalog everyone address in a book smaller than the annuaire pages blanches.

  • cudbud64cudbud64

    For me, it's the quality of the karma I leave, the five stars mean less to me. I've done a significant amount of vetting prior to meeting and cuddling to see if we'll get along personality wise, which makes a huge difference in my cuddling experiences. I enjoy reading karma with a filled out profile for a fuller picture of who someone is as a potential cuddle buddy

  • tallteddytallteddy

    If you have 2 arms, you're probably a good cuddle. And if you only have one arm, you probably still are, and I'd give it a go.

    From what I've seen on the site, people who misbehave get dealt with quickly. They get banned, making it very hard to receive bad karma.

  • frankparker9frankparker9

    @CuddleWho Exactly what I was going to say.

    Plus, this site doesn’t have to be like Yelp: “3/5 stars. Service was great, food was just ok. My friend ordered the french fries and they were very bland…” and on and on with faint criticism when all that happened is they sat down in a clean place, were treated well, and promptly served some nice freshly-made food. I really appreciate all the pros who have cuddled me. Some have had an extra “wow” factor, but they’ve all been quite good.

  • quincyq03quincyq03

    I’ve only given one karma and it was 4/5. It was an okay cuddle experience, but not great. I felt sorta bad about leaving it, but I wanted to be completely honest. It’s also the only cuddle experience I’ve had on here in four years…

    I do agree that the vast majority of reviews are 5-stars. I’ve seen a few 1-stars for truly bad experiences or scammers, but I can’t say I’ve seen any between 2-4 stars.

    A 4-star review isn’t even bad, if you use typical review scales. I write reviews for restaurants, hotels, etc. since I travel often and I only give 5-stars if it was a truly exceptional experience.

  • hikikomorichanhikikomorichan

    @quincyq03 based.
    I don't really have expectations, I just remain aware that anything can happen.

  • [Deleted User]goodguy197636 (deleted user)

    Most of the people I have snuggled with have been nice people and have enjoyed our time together. I have written a bad experience and gave a person 2 stars on here one time. She had blocked me before she made it to her car. I talked with admins at that time and they unblocked so I can write a review. I kept it 100% honest and did not cuss her out or nothing like that. I just gave the truth just so people would be aware. There was nothing violent or nothing like that but had bad time and was uneasy the whole time. Be care on reading reviews. I've also had a amazing time the 1st time with someone and the 2nd meeting got downgraded a lot and should have ended the session half way through. But yes there are some wonderful people on here too. Please be careful and yall have some amazing sessions together!!

  • hikikomorichanhikikomorichan

    you did the right thing bro, I wish people were more open to talking about what upset them than systematically blocking people they don't agree with, and they say 4chan has a bad reputation.
    On image-boards you get judged by what you post not for who you are, and I always see it as a sign of victory when they move to the ad-homeniem. stating the fact that i'm a fat autistic hikikomori weeaboo is not doing much to refute their point.

    Turns out you don't even need the 7 dirty words to upset someone these days! but as Malcom X stated if you have no critics you will have no success.

    I prefer Kiyo-san praising my PS1 style graphics while saying my animation needs a little work. than the systematic approval of bugs and glitches from one of the apustajas. I can understand that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but a mismatched palette is a mismatched palette no matter how much it reminds you of Picasso!

  • RadiantHugsRadiantHugs Mod

    I can’t speak for why everyone has five star reviews (which is actually not true) but I can certainly speak for me - I have five star reviews because I truly try to make it a five star experience for everyone who chooses to cuddle with me - pro or enthusiast 😊

  • TxTomTxTom

    Praise in public,
    Punish in private.

  • SunsetSnugglesSunsetSnuggles

    I noticed this as soon as I joined last year, as well, and I determined to be honest in my Karma writing and rating.

    Great in-person experiences, which most have been (thank goodness to such a beautiful community, and a thoughtful vetting process!), get 5 stars.

    If it could have been better, I will be honest and give 4 stars. This is difficult for me as I'm non-confrontational, and definitely don't want to hurt anyone, but I see Karma as my word on the line and I don't give that lightly. To me, 5 stars means, "couldn't have been better", so if that wasn't my experience, I will be real.

    I've never yet had to leave less than that for someone I've met in person, as Karma is typically reserved for. There are tons of perverts out there who would get 1 star, to be sure, but they never make it past the PM stage and vetting, to the coffee/cuddle stage, therefore they don't get Karma. They'll get reported and most often banned.

    In the case of a less than 4-star in-person experience, that would also be reported and worked through, officially. I will not leave up a Karma I can no longer stand behind or that doesn't represent on-going experiences with a cuddler.

    ~ Sunset Snuggles

  • JoyfulHeartJoyfulHeart

    It's thought-provoking and informative to read the well-thought-out responses here.

    Since there is little to no variation in the number of stars that people in their karma, I've found it helpful to also consider a couple other factors in people's reviews.

    First is the number of reviews one has in comparison to how long they've been on. A few reviews over a long period of time might not be a bad sign, because someone may have simply chosen not to cuddle that often. On the other hand, if someone has a lot of reviews in a shorter period of time, it's a likely indication that they are doing something right.

    Second (and probably more helpful to me) is the language of the review itself. When a review is detailed and includes things that would be important to me, that positively impacts my impression of a potential cuddler.

    A tangentially-related thought:

    I've found it interesting to see what a potential cuddler has written in karma they've left for others. If they leave thoughtful and specific reviews, it shows they have the capacity to be thoughtful, and that they notice details. I like those qualities in a cuddler.

    And another:

    Anyone who has been here a while has probably seen me comment about the fact that I think many people write their own karma when they post in the forum.

  • All_the_snuggsAll_the_snuggs

    My MOST inappropriate client had 20+ 5 star reviews. Karma is a nice tool to see who has snuggled with a client so I can reach out if I get a weird feeling while communicating with someone. It also let's me (as a pro) know what pros might be more willing to allow the inappropriate behavior so I will keep an eye out for their karma on other potential client profiles.

    To @Rezz point....nothing should take the place of your own due diligence and gut feelings.

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