This is an unfortunate unsolvable situation...as a pro cuddler, I don't normally ask for a deposit, unless someone cancels on me last minute or multiple times. Then I require a deposit for subsequent visits. I've also driven over an hour to cuddle someone, to end up being ghosted right when I got there...so wasted my time and gas. Also like another pro posted, got ghosted after weeks of texting and paying for a room. Pros and enthusiasts both have stories justifying why deposits should be required, and why it's also risky. In the end there's no perfect solution, go with your gut
Carrieanna you are way off base. I've never been offered anything extra from a pro that has been banned, but I have been with pros with over 60 karma.
@TxTom Yes, we can! NCNS, gropers, etc. I can see the Pros making the same case for a $500 deposit from clients.
@Allen1974 Then that leaves the pros were trying to book clients off the service. That's the other main reason pros get banned.
I can understand why some cuddlers would ask for a deposit, but I just won't do it. Fortunately I have been able to book with a few pros who don't require it and we've had wonderful sessions.
If you're a new client for me I always ask for a deposit. 30% of the total session cost sent as a deposit along with a selfie of themselves holding up a certain amount of fingers. (The amount of fingers change often)
I also have enough karma that proves clients have successfully done this with me at least 30x. If I were a client I don't think I'd send a deposit to a pro that has 0 reviews or was super new or had no or very little description in their profile.
@OliveGreen would you forego a deposit with a new client if they had multiple positive karmas?
@Morpheus I bet the answer is "no." Because as @Rezz alluded to somewhere in another thread, a good client can suddenly go bad.
(Edited: I meant "no")
Sorry that has happened to you. Before I used to always require payment before meeting since it shows they are serious and I won't need to deal with no shows. And I had a great experience so far so had been less strict about it. Sure, for virtual I still need it before the session but with in person sessions I have let them pay before the sessions or right when we see each other. No issues yet.
In your case you just dealt with a dishonest pro. They shouldn't be here even. Did they have karma at all? If not then for future sessions avoid booking with those who don't have karma. Just don't let that person be the reason you stop cuddling.
So I learned my lesson the hard way. I cuddled with a pro several times in a year period. We built trust. She never asked me for a deposit… until the last cuddle we were going to meet.
She asked for an advance and because I trusted her, I thought it would be ok. Big mistake, and as soon as I gave her the advance, i knew i screwed up.
So I had gotten our usual hotel and 10 min before we were to meet, she called and gave me some sob story about her kids were mad at her and she just couldn’t get over it. There were fake tears and all.
So I learned my lesson. Never advance anything. A small deposit is one thing.
This should probably be moved to the pro section. Can’t really relate…
I personally would rather not pay a deposit. I did pay a deposit once that I remember. I may have done it more but only remember once. When I booked this pro, she sent me a proposal for a certain dollar amount and asked I pay half. I decided to go ahead and do it but the half she asked me to pay was actually more than half. I was a little confused but paid that amount that she asked and didn’t think much about it. She was visiting from out of state and had limited time so I was understanding about the deposit. The day before the session I looked at her profile and realized that she asked for a higher amount when traveling which half of that was the half she asked me for up front. I started to think she made a mistake and meant to charge me her travel cuddle fee. I asked her because I didn’t want to have an awkward moment in person where I gave her less than she expected. She said she had made a mistake when should have sent me a proposal at the amount of her travel fee. She was very polite though and said it was her mistake so she would honor the proposal that she had sent. We had an amazing session. My point is, if you are going to pay a deposit, make sure everyone is clear on everything.
@PrettyLuv Might not be a bad idea.
I love the title “ripped off by a pro” sounds like a documentary on 20/20 lol 😂
@bigolbears Did you report her?
That was the first thing I did was report it. I haven't heard from anyone and she hasn't been banned.
I just looked again. She has been banned.
No.... thank you Dr Strange…
The mods will not normally inform you what the results were of your report. Once you make the report, it's in their hands.
Be advised that these types of threads are really unnecessary. We don't need public flame/shame threads.
I hope all is resolved to your satisfaction. @Allen1974 - patience is a virtue. Supposedly. That said, I'm in the Carrie Fisher camp, for life: "Instant gratification takes too long."
It is not necessary to ask if anyone else in case got took by this person? Where is the flame shame. I'm the one that got took and now I'm the bad one?
You made your report. Why does it matter what interactions the pro had with anyone else?
IMO its time to end this thread. Nothing more can be gained here.
That's for sure. I guess that is why I have never participated in this forum..
@Allen1974 C'mon, you said she's banned. That ends it. You got your vengeance. Nobody else has PUBLICLY come forward like you did, so still it's not enough? Remember, you can make a report without posting in the forum. Keep on this and it's entirely possible you'll find yourself getting a Timeout or ending up in the Banned Camp. (Disclaimer: I borrowed that term, it's not mine originally.)
@Allen1974 - you're responsible for you. You had an issue, you reported it, it was resolved. If others have or had an issue, it's on them to report and seek resolution. Proclaiming publicly that you've been ripped off does nothing but generate car-crash click bait.
We encourage strong vetting for everyone. For whatever reason, if it's the anonymity of the internet, or the point and click expectation of instant gratification a la Amazon... guys get in here and expect instant results. "Me cuddle NOW." Making connections takes time. Making meaningful connections take work, whether they are between enthusiasts or Pros. Trust but verify is my motto in all that is internet-based.
If I don't sound sympathetic it's because I'm not. Put in the work. Have patience. And lay off the public gripes. All it does is unnecessarily aggravate and put you in moderator cross-hairs. Good luck.
Only read through the first page...but as a pro myself, the only time I ever ask for a deposit is if I got a request from them in the past and they ghosted/flaked/cancelled last minute. At that point I require a full hour deposit. Most of them say nothing after that. Clearly they don't take my time seriously.
I think that is very reasonable. I do a lot of buying and selling vintage motorcycles, it is amazing how many people say there going to meet at a certain and dont show.
Sid. Thanks for the warning that I am now in the cross hairs of the moderators for wanting to warn people of a scam . You must have a pretty dull life if your going to waste your time watching me. It will be like watching grass grow.
@Allen1974
How much attention do you need? The pro you posted about has been banned. There's a sticky at the top of the forum warning members ( YOU ) about catfishing and the risks of sending deposits. You took the risk and lost a mind boggling $20. Would you like someone to give you attention the you're craving by holding your hand and starting a Go Fund Me to recoup your devastating losses?