I want to know what the sweet spot for pros is because while I’d love to go 4 hours, if they are just wanting the alarm to sound I would feel pretty bad for them having to cuddle me if their heart wasn’t in it.
Edit: This was not in response to the comment by @stormydaycuddle omg I am sorry
@Charlie_Bear - yeah, if I feel like they are just interested in the money and counting down the seconds until it's over, I would leave feeling pretty shitty which is the opposite of why I book pros.
I'm not sure about a long session as I've never experienced one. I've never done more than 2 hours. I always thought it was better to break it up into more smaller sessions. You don't want to get sick of that person and have something to look forward to.
I do feel like those who have a good connection with people and don't really encounter the myriad of issues that the vocal ones who can't seem to find anybody are under represented. It's almost like how Yelp reviews are full of complaints from negative experiences because they are the ones most likely to leave a review . I do wish that people would pay some attention to some of the feedback and opinions shared about things they might want to do differently rather than getting defensive and going off the rails. I know some people just want to vent and be heard, but if you pose a problem in a public forum then people are going to inevitably respond to it .
@Charlie_Bear Having been a massage therapist, which I am guessing is somewhat similar, I have had some clients that I have felt more of a connection with than others. If the time was variable, I would find it easier to extend some sessions, though as a professional I would strive to make sure the client didn't know the difference. Perhaps the knowledge of what your cuddle pro really thinks of you is better left unknown?
Agree - you have to eat and drink sometime… more seriously though, as many have said anything to the extreme is not helpful. Would also agree with people on how too much with the same person has a higher likelihood of cementing feelings. Although, whether one or both parties developing feelings is an issue depends on the wishes of people involed, and how they act in response to feelings.
Still voting disagree though because I’ve never had too many :P
There is, but it's dependent on several factors. Who I'm cuddling with, how much touch I'm getting regularly beforehand, my mental state that day, how much socializing I've done leading up to the session, the cuddle partner's cuddle style, the weather...
I can get sensory overload, but usually not from cuddling alone. Cuddles are usually regenerative for me, but if I'm already too overstimulated and my cuddle partner is seeking more active cuddles it might just be a bit too much.
I have yet to meet a "cuddles threshold". I feel strongly that it is because I have taken the time to get to know the cuddlers I have spent longer spurts of time with; it just doesn't feel taxing to me to have spent a long time with them. Either your cup is getting filled up or it isn't. It's also okay to have less of a connection with a fellow cuddler and know you prefer shorter sessions with them.... certain friends and family members can fall in a that category lol.
Alsoooooo longer sessions also often involve meals and movement... just cuz ya sign up to cuddle does not mean you are required to be velcroed to that person 😝
Communication of expectations prior and check ins during or after are key to more memorable/cupfilling experiences 🤗
Gotta make time for poops and snacks
For me this depends what I’m going through and how much my cuddle tanks are filled up to. Last month after my dad passed away there was a very extreme loneliness. I was reaching out and not having any luck.
Most recently I do not feel as lonely and connected with more people.
Last year after having a bad relationship with a narcissist, I retreated into my self. Plus I didn’t want to spend money on cuddling. I can be cheap in regards to my self. I then connected with a wonderful cudddler. I had like a 5-6 hour session. That carried me for quite awhile.
Rereading others' responses, I find it interesting that people have chosen to respond to original question under the assumption of the "too much cuddling" occuring in one lump time.... i.e..a too long individual cuddle session, vs discussing too much cuddling in a day/week/month, or too much cuddling in general (like sensory overload).
That makes me wonder: how much cuddling do others need to have their "cuddle cup" filled? How many others also experience sensory overload if they do too many sessions in relatively short time span? For people in relationships with partners who also enjoy cuddling, do they plan to reserve energy/cuddle quota for them?
This probably needs its own post 😂
absolutely never !!
Only if they’re stinky
@cuddlefaery I definitely only approach this from the perspective of single session length. Getting too many cuddles in across different sessions is an issue I doubt I will ever encounter. Definitely much different for very active pros.
I second what @Charlie_Bear said... I spent a few days with a certain cuddler, and so, considering those were back to back with one person, was that one long cuddle or a bunch in a row? Either way, I didn't get sick of that cuddler, and I anticipate I will not be able to schedule that many back to back in my free time in the future lol.
@cudbud64 Oh yeah I didn’t consider it being many cuddles with the same person. Shows how little that happens for me lol. I know the one time I experienced that there was certainly zero burnout. I’d very much like to see how long it would take to grow tired of that 😅
Oh my goodness!!! There are so many interesting thoughts here. And lots of different perspectives!
When I started this we were still pretty burdened by “the pandemic which shall not be named” and a LOT of people were struggling because of an extremely low percentage of CONNECTION…. We were even grateful to chat with our neighbors across the lawn from our own driveways.
I’m going to have to peruse through all the comments and process a bit….
This is so interesting. I know a lot of people didn’t know about the original post that spurred the thought process here but it wasn’t about one long singular cuddle. It was about cuddling in life and specifically this was about REALLY CARING about someone but not needing as many cuddles as your person.
It’s always so fascinating hearing different viewpoints. Thank you all for sharing!!
HUGS TO YOU CUDDLE PEEPS! 😊
@sillysassy - I joined this site in 2017 and wasn't that active in the forums until the pandemic hit. I was looking for some way to connect with people. I live alone and a year in total isolation was such a struggle that I don't want to think about it.
How can I have too many cuddles when Im not getting any cuddles, except Spouse oc. And enthusiasts turn out to be flakes.
@CelestialTouch -If you're trying to reach out to enthusiasts, it might help to fill out your profile.
...and I consider you to be lucky if you have a spouse to cuddle with. I don't even have that. I'm too socially awkward to date.
Wow, there were a lot of great responses on this topic. As a pro cuddler, I don’t think there’s such a thing as too many cuddles. I recently started out in the cuddling community and it’s been a great journey so far! I’ve realized there are so many needs and differences between pros, clients, enthusiasts, that in some way, we all balance each other out.
Personally, I’ve had cuddles last for 1 hour to 7 hours. Yeah it might be extensive, but I find that building good connections with clients make the cuddling experience even that much better and the sessions itself are therapeutic. There are many great people on this site and I look forward to hearing the stories you all share on the forums.
🫶🏽 Happy cuddling
@quixotic_life omgosh.... I was going back through some comments.... 😂😂😂 the number crunching.
🤔 Hrm... I hope my math is right even if my logic isn't...
@sunnysideup mentioned
I would say it would depend on the person. Everyone has different tolerances and satiety points. For one person, 1 hour of cuddling in a month might be enough for them. For others, 8 hours a day, and still more!
This comment.....
I was talking with a few different pro's recently. One of them mentioned that they "felt like they were actually LITERALLY losing muscle mass" because of so much cuddling. I know everyone talks about pro's like they are living the dream, but when you sit down and think about what it means to cuddle professionally, it is a LOT of cuddling!! Not walking around, not exercising, not running errands or getting out in the sunshine.... EVERYONE WANTS THE CUDDLE ON THE BED.... HORIZONTAL That was something I hadn't even really considered. I would be so completely stir crazy!!!
I got to have a lovely overnight snuggle and it was hard to sleep because every time one of us shifted, we were reminded that we had someone to cuddle and therefore we got very little sleep. We finally had to put on our "adulting hat" and be resolved to get a few hours of sleep so we weren't worthless the next day.
What I realized was this. We sometimes feel like we are NEVER going to get another cuddle and so we pile absolutely everything onto the time that we are with someone. Instead of enjoying the moment for exactly what it is, we worry that it will never come again and so our stress over that kind of ruins the chance of enjoying things in the moment.
I was recently rewarded with an incredible story of a cuddler who came to the site a very very VERY shy and introverted enthusiast. They were willing to chat a bit and we got to meet in person, but I think I made them feel so nervous just by meeting at a restaurant that we never even got past that part. I worried that their anxiety might make it so challenging that they would never be able to relax and enjoy a cuddle at all... EVER. I heard that they are so comfortable with themselves after doing some life changes, some personal growth work, realigning things in their world that now they're cuddling with some regularity! It was so fun to see this person evolve into their best self.
I know a lot of people come to this community and can only be mad about what they don't have. They can only look at someone else and say "they have it better than me." Or they just do NOT have the mental energy to try and figure out how their lives could possibly be anything different. We all have our stories and our background that brought us to this community. And as it has been said, we all have different needs surrounding cuddling, but the most amazing thing about this website and the idea of "just cuddles" is that we have a new source that is chock full of ideas and a wealth of information!
When I re-read the post from Don from years ago, I saw such an amazing gathering of beautiful souls trying to help someone grow into themselves. Where can you find that these days?
Pro or Enthusiast, high cuddle satiety or low, no matter how you present, you can find people who relate to you in this cuddleverse.
And I absolutely love this from @SoftHugsnWell
I’ve realized there are so many needs and differences between pros, clients, enthusiasts, that in some way, we all balance each other out.
We are all unique. It takes everyone, at every level, in every circumstance, to make it a community. Thank you all for being willng to share your thoughts and feelings. I appreciate that we have over 200 pages of forum threads to learn about this cuddle journey and that we have each others experiences as well. (Even those cuddlers who don't post very often on the threads.)
@sillysassy I'm glad that you are here!
Awwww @JoyfulHeart I am glad you are here too! It is a fantastical journey that we are on isn't it?
I love what you said about...
I'm experiencing the delightful anticipation that comes from a countdown to such a reconnection.
It is FUN to connect with people who are near and FAR! It gives us a feeling of future possibilities. 😊
Yes and yes but for me too much of anything involving people is too much . Gotta have my space. I am good for a few days, maybe even a week, , but after that I need solitude. So don't ask me to be your roommate and things will be just fine.
Sometimes it is tough for me to cuddle in summer because the air conditioning is unnatural.
I used to seriously believe, “Too much of a good thing is a great thing” or in the famous words of Col. Hannibal Smith, “Overkill is under rated.” 😂
I’ve grown immensely as a person in the nearly 2 years I have been on this site. When I first joined I was starved for touch and connection and I felt like I couldn’t get enough. If I had been asked back then if it were possible to have too many cuddles, my answer would have been an emphatic “Heck NO!”
However, as I have made numerous meaningful connections here, had my “cuddle cup” filled, and undergone some significant changes in my personal life, I feel much more balanced today. I thoroughly enjoy cuddling but I don’t feel like I am starving for touch and connection like I was 2 years ago. So today, my answer to “is there such thing as too many cuddles” would be a qualified “maybe”. I doubt most people would have the time / opportunity for too many cuddles but I think it is possible to happen.
@JohnR1972 his tagline also fits very well here. "I love it when a plan comes together!"
@AllAboutSoul 👍 I was wondering how many people would get the Col. Hannibal Smith reference. I loved the TV show from the 80s and I thought the movie a few years ago really kept the spirit of the TV show. “I pity the fool” who hasn’t seen it 😂