Helping/Hurting

Jova114Jova114
in General

Good Day Cuddlrooskis

I hope you all are at good parts in the story that is your life!

This post a little different today.

As I sit and think about my struggles mentally I sometimes wonder is being on this site healthy for me?

I have met with one pro to cuddle
And am meeting another for a nice platonic date soon.
But other than that I find myself jumping into forums and trying to spread positivity and kindness with compliments and good conversations more than anything.

Do I belong here?
If im not trying to cuddle on a regular basis, should I be here?

Of course a lot of my mental struggles play a big part in my thought process.

I mean I try my hardest to not be rude and I can admit I have been a few times but overall
Do I belong here?

I am just looking for your thoughts on people belonging to this site.
Not out for sympathy
Please share
:)

Comments

  • warm_embracewarm_embrace

    I’d say that you belong here as long as it’s meeting some need of yours and you’re respectful and appropriate with others in the community.

  • Carrie_AnneCarrie_Anne

    Good morning Jova. I don’t think i can answer that for you. But I’ve asked myself about time i spend on the forums. I think overall it’s been a great benefit and learning experience and I feel less lonely, more validated.
    For you specifically, I always look forward to and read your posts. Someone once commented on your hair, which I also like!
    You’re cheerful and kind from what I can tell!
    But maybe more time away from the screen (balance?) would be my only suggestion. Fresh air? I played kickball outside in 110 degree heat at 3pm with my G Son the last 2 days. I Did Not Want To! But felt amazing after!
    Variety is the spice of life!

  • Jova114Jova114

    @warm_embrace
    It does but I feel selfish.
    Maybe that's on me and something I need to work on

  • Jova114Jova114

    @carrieanne
    First, bless you on doing kickball in the heat. I don't even like taking my dog out when it's hot lol

    Thank you for the compliments I do appreciate them :)
    I should balance my screen time more so I might start factoring that in. Good call.

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    @Jova114 I admire your spirit and self-awareness as well as being open about your personal journey. I would say you are one of the rare souls that enhances CC. I do not detect a malicious bone in your body and my overall impression is you are one of those humans we need more of.

  • warm_embracewarm_embrace

    @Jova114 sorry about my left-brain minimalist response to your post. I think @carrieanne raised lots of good points to consider. I tend to get involved on here in spurts and I often take long hiatuses between cuddles.

  • JohnR1972JohnR1972

    @Jova114 - I appreciate your openness and optimism (even on the days you may not personally be feeling that optimism you still come across with a sense of optimism).

    I value your contributions to the forum but I also understand your question about is it actually helping or hurting and I believe the answer is an emphatic yes! This month marks my 2nd anniversary on CC and I have deactivated my account several times over the past 2 years. Sometimes just for a few days, sometimes for over a month at a time. I agree with @carrieanne that we should all strive for balance and your balance point may be different than mine or anyone else’s.

  • Jova114Jova114

    @BoomerSpooner
    Thank you my friend. That means a lot! More than I can show

  • Jova114Jova114

    @warm_embrace
    No need for apologies at all.
    I do agree. I gotta get my inner Thanos on.

    The balance part...not the genocide part lol

  • TxTomTxTom

    @Jova114 I agree with the sentiments of others that you are a benefit to this site, despite not knowing you in person.

    Since comfort is the operative word of this site, comfort can be given and received in person, or virtually using video chat or just commenting on these forums.

    I hope you choose to hang around.

  • Jova114Jova114

    @JohnR1972 Thank you.
    I have a lot of struggles, and I assume we all do. But I am trying to rewire my brain and be more positive.

    Happy Anniversary! And it seems like that's the way to go, just taking some breaks.

    I was just concerned if I was being in a spot that's more deserving for others ya know?
    But that's something on me I'll bring up in therapy

  • Jova114Jova114

    @TxTom
    You raise a good point.
    It is a comfort site.
    Thank you

  • BearBear

    @Jova114 from what I have read so far, you do not only belong here you are very welcome here.

  • Jova114Jova114

    Thank you @Bear

    I promise you all I didn't post this for you all to pat me on the back and says it okay lol

    But I do appreciate it all very much

  • BearBear

    @Jova114 I don’t see it as a pat on the back. It’s more of a confirmation of love and acceptance.

  • CuddleHugs01234CuddleHugs01234

    @Jova114 Sure you belong here, if you want to be here! You’ve started some interesting conversations. It’s not mandatory that you cuddle a certain amount to be on the forum. A big virtual hug to you!

  • achetocuddleachetocuddle

    Thank goodness a certain amount of cuddling is not required or I'd be dead in the water, lol. @Jova114 I agree with @CuddleHugs01234. You are more interesting than I originally thought. And seem to have a good heart. And it's easy to tell you are not fishing for pats on the back. I have those people identified and do not respond to them. A few hours ago I was thinking about what a breath of fresh air you are, no kidding.

  • quixotic_lifequixotic_life

    @Jova114 ~ I really get that bit of wondering about belonging here (or anywhere really). My judge-'mental' mumblers are constantly coming up with an overly disproportionate amount of disparaging ideas about me and knocking me down whenever things seem to start being okay since the last low.

    And no kidding that it's a good thing one's amount of cuddling isn't factored into their belonging here or not because it's been 9 months since I've cuddled anyone other than my partner (but I honestly haven't wanted to cuddle anyone else since meeting him anyway so yay).

    But I still like it here. I still feel connected to this community. So for this specific space, I have to remind myself that I adore the majority of people I've met and/or interacted with here. I care about how they're doing, how they might repond to different topics, etc, and I have to hope that from time to time they perhaps feel the same about me and (dispite what my inner neighsayers might put forth), maybe when they notice I've piped-up and I'm still around, they'll smile remembering me/us from before - When I felt I belonged here and didn't really question it much at all.

  • luckystrike23luckystrike23

    Here is my two scents -lavender and oak 😂

    I struggle with anxiety. Sometimes it debilitating being able to share my thoghta in a forum. Maybe/eventually meet someone for a public cuddle is so relieving. Just getting my mind off my mind helps so much. And look who did that today that today it’s @Jova114. So you have at least helped me today- of course you belong!

  • Midnight01Midnight01

    If you aren’t looking for cuddle partners, whether pro or enthusiasts, on a fairly regular basis, (money is tight, inflation, etc) and you know you have mental struggles, then you shouldn’t be here yucking it up on forums IMO. Internet forums aren’t healthy, people are fake; use your time for something healthier.

  • [Deleted User]Deltron2000 (deleted user)
    edited August 2023

    @Jova114 Hi. I don't know you but look at the overwhelming response, so of course you belong and are accepted. True that cuddlecomfort can get a little weird as does everything internet related, but it is what you make of it. Good on you for opening up about any mental health issues, that's brave and boss-level thing to do, lots of people don't have the sand to be that honest.

  • [Deleted User]Hunnay (deleted user)

    @Jova114 I think making the effort to be here shows that you belong here and you matter. I hope your week gets a lot better 🥰

  • Jova114Jova114

    Wow...just wow.
    These responses definitely made my day today!
    Thank you all so so much!
    It's stuff like this that makes me love this site.

  • KozyKimKozyKim

    @Jova114 you most definitely belong here. You have good insight and great responses to forum posts. I love what you said in my post misunderstood. Even though I don’t know you well, that coming from someone else might’ve not came across well, but you seem to have that fatherly, gentle nature that calls out the good things in people. You seem like a friend on here to people, so you are valuable in that regard. You are seemingly safe and compassionate, so you would make for a good cuddle partner. Please stay we need more gentle fatherly men here.

    I’m glad you’re going on a platonic date because I think those are really rewarding there’s still a lot of cuddling and a lot of time to really listen to the other person. You seem like a very genuine person. I wish you were closer. Stay!!!🤗🤗

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