@WriterGF ya I know, not out to win friends and like I said in my original post, I expected the flak, but still commenting since I read the same thing come up over and over and asshole guys is an important issue people should be prepared for because I hear about them from a lot of my female cuddler friends. True, guys should not be creeps, it's 100% on them, they are the ones at fault, it should not happen. But it's how tt is, most female cuddlers handle it well, but some maybe newer people get caught by surprise. So if anything I said here might help then I'm glad to swallow any flak I get, might rub some people the wrong way but might actually be decent advice to someone else.
@Mike403 Day #1 .. 3 cuddles. Had my leg humped, boobs grazed, butt rubbed. One amazing cuddler I'd love to cuddle with again. But not one didn't at some point get an erection (but one did best to hide it). I had one that wanted to make it known he was excited. No attempt to cover it up or anything. Had one who received a decent back massage. His air went out and it was way too hot to snuggle. Planned to book again when air was fixed. Nothing. But I've been informed of what's wanted to take place next cuddle (I'm grown... i don't tattle when it's been phone conversion.. something done or said here, I'll report). The other one i had i had to travel quite a distance. He stated he still pay me full amount because i battled horrible traffic. Paid me half only. I guarantee, these folks charging beyond $100 either think their shit don't stink or they are being shady and doing what they want to make that paper. This site takes zero precautions when signing people up. It's not like these clients are watching our web stream. It's physical with strangers. It's like they are having us meet pibulls with raw meat around our waist and trusting they arent going to want a bite. 🤣🤣🤣
I will say this, also. I don't know how many of you have tried the online dating thing the past 3 years. Let me tell you. I was in a relationship for just over 18 years. After he left, i tried the online stuff. I felt like i just woke from a coma. No one cares about anyone anymore. It's all about hit it and quit it. Yet there are still so many out there who want more, but because of societal changes, more folks are out there CRAVING connection. Touch. Having the need to feel desirable. Then they get body to body with someone and instincts kick in. I know how that feels. And it's so hard to be that close and not feel some type of urge. So, for me, unless I'm actually being assaulted, i try to be more empathetic before i run home to mama and tell on someone. Move away from them, look at them, remind them, and give it another shot. It could've been just reacting after the longing. We all need to be put in our place once in a while ... not everything needs to end with being black balled. Remember... conversation can be all it takes. Obviously repeat offenders should be dealt with. I've reported one person. 2nd message was a dick pic.
....
@MatureCuddlez - If somebody sends you a dick pic, send them back a bigger one.
@Deltron2000 - Maybe you should teach men how to not prey on women?
Roxanne. I do not usually look at forum discussions very often but this one I felt that I wanted to post at. I agree with your assessment as I have had a few good platonic sessions. But there have been times when contacting about setting up a session I do not feel that the other person was just interested in cuddling. Maybe I am being too paranoid but just a feeling that I had. I can understand the pressures.
Not trying to delete what I said from the record. I just know that what I said was harsh
@MatureCuddlez having said that you should probably remove the “Netflix and chill” from your profile. Just sayin’…
…….
People suck.
Be ready and able to protect yourself, both proactively and reactively.
And yes, it sucks, yes it is exhausting, and yes we all wish it wasn't true.
But since wishing makes nothing true... readiness is all.
Imagine a world where at least some people learn not to suck. It may be an idealistic notion, but I believe that there are some who improve their behavior because of peer pressure.
The best place to address ANY problem is at the source.
I'm tired of victim-blaming, and of the defense of victim-blamers.
Full disclosure: although the overwhelming majority of SA survivors are women, there are men who have experienced it. It took me DECADES to stop blaming myself for what someone did to me, and I won't sit quietly while people make it harder for survivors to heal. Victim blaming is nauseating behavior.
The best kind of masculinity is the masculinity that advocates for healthy male behavior.
@Deltron2000 SMH 🫣🫣🫢🤥🫠🫠😱😱 I can tell what point you are trying to make, but it is utterly terrifying the level of accountability you’ve just completely neglected behind what you’ve just said. So an appealing picture deserves/invites someone sexually violating a human beings rights, space and boundaries ….. 🔍🔍🧐 ? I’m going to leave the rest of my questions and concerns alone bcus there’s just too many red flags 🚩 to unfold here. …….. 🐰rabbit meet hole 🕳️ but I’ll leave off on this note, everyone is entitled to their opinion so I see and understand what yours is clearly 👍🏾 ☺️
@Kaagee
I love how You just said it perfectly !
How helpful it would be if individuals would simply read the terms and conditions they signed to when joining! Then they wouldn’t have any confusion, regardless of someone’s choice of picture(s). C.C. Is strictly platonic. It says it in the rules so clearly.
I’m not sure how else C.C. can tell literally every single user here that signed and agreed to it that what you are going to get whether you pay a professional or schedule with an enthusiast, is a platonic and non-sexual cuddle session. Regardless of how someone is dressed or how much they charge per hour does not even remotely equal sexually assaulting someone who took the time out of their day to hug and cuddle someone who put on the facade that they really needed/wanted the emotional support and platonic touch to just go and start trying to violate them and their boundaries. Outfits and compensation don’t equate to sexual harassment/favors. Otherwise how terrifying it should be for anyone to ever go to the beach 🏖️ 👙🩲
@stormydaycuddle
Your comment of him coming back in his next life as a woman 👌🏾😂 is truly top tier🎭 the entire post was spot on !!!!
~ Happy Platonic Cuddling Everyone 🤗 ~
@MatureCuddlez You go girl. @Mike403 I had forgotten your great previously posted idea about send them a bigger one in a pic, so hilarious and spot ON! I've never received one of those pics anywhere in my entire life, but I think I will respond this way if I ever do.
@MatureCuddlez I'm hoping you're simply using the term incorrectly. Netflix and Chill is a way of saying engaging in sexual activity. It doesn't mean in the literal sense. A while ago I thought it was literal too. After some very bad dates someone explained it to me. Eeesh.
@Deltron2000 hanging in there dude? Reach out if you need some emotional support 🤣🤣🤣
You people are something else.
I guess that people who support making the world a safer place are weird? If that's the case, I'm proudly "something else."
No negative karma needed. Red flags are being displayed proudly.
@Sooson - Maybe because they are sick of being assaulting simply because how they choose to dress? Have you noticed that it's always other men who defend the victim blamers?
@Sooson his account has been deleted. And what do you mean by "you people"? Where was anyone mean to him or wrong about what they replied to his comments? What about his comments was correct (so others were wrong for correcting him)? If anyone was wrong.... absolutely let us know.
Otherwise, why support someone who is basically insisting that it's ok to sexually assault a woman if she wears a particular outfit (that HE deems too sexy) or if she charges a certain amount for her time (that HE deems too much)? Because that is not true. And it never was true....not 50 years ago and not now.
Yikes! You step away from a forum for a bit....and all Hell breaks loose! 😬
Not gonna lie, it's fairly jarring to see the amount of predatory members who came onto a thread started by a woman discussing times that people tried to cross her personal boundaries. 🤨 And even more so to see how many men try to DEFEND those behaviors!!
Sexual 👏 assault 👏 is 👏 NOT 👏 ok....in any circumstances.
And 👏 women 👏 are 👏 NOT 👏 responsible 👏 for 👏 men's 👏 bad 👏 behavior....no matter what they wear or what they charge.
@Deltron2000 already explained the purpose of his post. Attacking him by lecturing how people should behave doesnt make anyone safer. We have an epidemic in this county of men in their 40s and 50s that are sexless touch less loveless and don't know how to communicate or even begin a conversation with a woman , that jerk off to shemale midgets in their moms basement. They are so desperate they will smash a sheep if they could. And statistically some of them will end up here. This is the harsh reality that you softies refuse to accept. It's wrong it's bad its sad but that's where we are. And someone here I'd just trying to alert people of that reality.
And women here are not that innocent. You pro cuddles know this better than us so let's not pretend. As we speak there are pictures on this platform of the kind you would expect to find on AFF and such. So until someone can figure out how to set up a workshop for all the perverts out there or give them some magic pill, lats be safer that's all.
@RedFox16 He was not insisting it is ok to sexually assault. And besides that I agree with all that you said.
@Sooson - Even on sites like AFF, you have to ask for consent and get a verbal yes before touching anyone you meet. Why is this such a difficult concept?
@Mike403 check your DM
Yes, we ladies ALL know that we need to be safe out there....that's not even remotely anyone's point here, except the men commenting. It's that we shouldn't have to be THIS worried for our safety. Yes, men in their 40s+ tend to be the biggest offenders as they were raised when sexual assault was still a women's fault ....and "boys will be boys" was an acceptable excuse for that behavior.
You are also essentially using the boys will be boys rhetoric. Which is very much dismissive of what women deal with....and how we have to build our whole lives around being safe. Not only during cuddling...but literally anywhere and any time in our lives we have to be aware and "careful". So forgive us for being a bit salty about that fact when someone tries to excuse men's predatory behavior....or excuses a man in the comments for literally blaming us for THEIR behavior.
@Sooson Imagine the situation regarding ANY other personal crime. If a person breaks into your house, would you like it if the police excuse their behavior by blaming you for the thief breaking in? "Well, YOU shouldn't have such a nice house that someone would want to violate." Or "It's your fault for keeping your home pretty, so that a thief would be attracted to it." "You should KNOW that burglars would want to break into a house that costs so much.....so why are you surprised that it happened?"
Try that with ANY victim crime and see how s****y it feels to constantly have men saying those same things about sexual assault and how it's always our fault somehow.
@Mike403 I agree. The problem here is that you guys are just selling hopeium. Yes you should ask for consent. And people should behave exactly as you stated they should. But the reality is that they don't.
Not to mention your comment "and women here are not so innocent"
NO! That does NOT erase the predator's responsibility for their actions. Just because there might be some women doing things they shouldn't.....does NOT give a man the right to try to assault (or majorly cross boundaries) with EVERY woman on here. Those women are also responsible for their own behavior.....not all of us.
@RedFox16 if you read my post, I described these people more harshly than Nyone here. And you expect them to behave as they "should "? I don't disagree with you other than that you are shooting the messages.
sigh. I don't have the energy to argue about this anymore. My brain is already fried from doing about 4 hours of homework.
@Mike403 have GPT do it for you
@Sooson - lol. I'm an electrical engineering student. How is cheating going to help me pass exams?