🛑🚨📢 CHEERS To Finding YOUR Voice 🥰🥂🦋

sillysassysillysassy
in General

It is New Year's Eve in a wintry Colorado. I have seen quite a few threads about "Happy New Year" and "New Years Resolutions" and lovely sentiments like that. I have ALSO seen a LOT of people who are hoping to create new life habits that are less painful than the old ones..........

THIS thread is targeted at SHOUTING FROM THE ROOFTOPS about the courage it takes to engage in loving themselves enough to search for their own voice.

THE JOY I FEEL when I see someone doing this is immeasurable... COMPERSION is a real thing and I am so excited when I recognize this new pattern in myself as well.

I know we all have different stories, different backgrounds, different needs, but there has been an over arching theme of people who are struggling to mute the recording that told them they weren't deserving/good enough to be loved, cuddled, cared for, treated kindly, seen, heard, handled carefully, respected, listened to.... etc.

THIS thread is about that.

Maybe others will be encouraged by your story. Maybe you will find a few new strategies or tools to implement change.
Whatever it is.... I hope you'll remember that YOU are the one who gets to write the story of your life by reframing the messages in your heart and in your head. 😊🌈🦋

BACKSTORY - When I started CC I thought there would just be hundreds of beautiful souls who wanted to cuddle and I would get to meet all sorts of people who were "out of the box thinkers" finding a niche community that they could relate to. Instead I found so many who were reeling from past wounds and trying to rewrite their story moving forward by getting rid of the lies they were told throughout their life.

Comments

  • sillysassysillysassy

    I didn't always understand this.... I felt like I was reacting to everything else that was happening around me.

    As I got older, and after a LOT of painful changes made by those who I thought loved me most, I realized the only thing I can actually have any control over is MY reaction to everyone's choices. I get to write that part...... Years of therapy and book reading and class taking and soul searching.... I realized I was always reacting to everyone's opinion of me and changing my person to fit their goals/wants/desires etc. I could do everything differently in order to make sure and be what someone else needed in that moment..... THAT was what was needed to find true joy in relationships.

    What I didn't realize was how much it hurt when other's used that as power over me instead of just loving me for my heart and soul. When people are more interested in their own happiness (no matter who it hurts) they just keep changing the rules. Someone like I used to be would just scramble around to be the "new" right thing.

    YOU are the only one who knows your heart.
    YOU are the only one who knows what is truly in your best interests.
    YOU are the one who gets to choose who gets to be closest to you.

    YOU get to hold the pen and write the rest of your story chapter by chapter.

    CHEERS to finding your voice and others who will encourage that in you. 🥂

  • pmvinespmvines

    @sillysassy I like your voice . Glad to have found it 🤗

  • [Deleted User]SeriousSnuggler (deleted user)

    @sillysassy thank you for writing this it is beautifully said. I am new to the community and I came here looking for all of the things that you mentioned. Your post gives me hope that I can find them here. That I can learn to express my voice and authenticity and find connection and support.

  • sillysassysillysassy

    @SeriousSnuggler WELCOME TO THE SITE!!!! 😊 Los Angeles has a LOT of people so hopefully you'll be able to connect with some beautiful souls. (And thank you for the kind words... It was @Ripley54566 who was the inspiration for this thread... https://www.cuddlecomfort.com/forum/discussion/18889/fear-of-vulnerability#latest)

    Good on you for taking external steps to figure out your inner world.

    There's a lot of beautiful things to explore in this community, and I hope you are able to find all the things you need without too much ick.

  • JoyfulHeartJoyfulHeart
    edited December 2023

    It used to be that I didn't know I even had a voice. In the last several years, however, I've begun to discover that I do. My friendships and my work both help me to see the value of my perspective. I've been learning that I can be a leader, and that people will follow me, not just willingly, but enthusiastically.

  • MissAdventurousMissAdventurous

    Beautifully spoken my friend. @sillysassy

  • sillysassysillysassy

    @MissAdventurous and @pmvines I know this journey through life hasn’t been free of troublesome times.

    I appreciate you both and your willingness to be authentic regarding the deeper stuff. This cuddle community is so lucky to have people like you.

    @JoyfulHeart it has been so enjoyable seeing some of your transformation from your thoughtful sharing on this forum. I love that you have found people who can mirror back to you the awesomeness that I see.

    Sometimes we NEED a friend to be a mirror and sometimes we GET TO BE the mirror for another.

    A friend shared this song with me…. I love the sentiment it brings.

    “I’ll be your mirror, reflect who you are, in case you don’t know…”

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