I walked in on my girlfriend having s*x with her personal trainer.
I guess it was her cheat day
What do you when you have an elephant with 3 balls?
Walk him, then pitch to the leopard..
I hope "dad joke" doesn't mean something you'd tell to a kid. Some of these are pretty, shall we say, sophisticated.
But I do have a dirty joke I could tell. It's about a pig that fell in the mud.
I am a dad. I am indeed a joke. Hahahaha
Bless me, father, for I have sneezed.
I would drop a dad joke here as the forum name suggests, but I don't want it to land on anyone and hurt them (ehh, I'll try better next time!) 🤣
What is a donkeys favorite shade of color?
NEEEE-OOONNNNN!!!!!
Someone asked me to name 2 structures that hold water.
I thought to myself, well, dam...
So we are at page 11 and we kinda get the point so how about let's try to challange ourselves to keep it cuddling related ?
I'm gonna go first:
How do you call a professional male cuddler ?
Fee-Male
How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles!! Badum tsssss
Forewarned is half an octopus.
Why did the blanket go to therapy?
Because it had too many emotional attachments!
Why are teddy bears never good at sharing cuddles?
Because they’re always stuffed!
Why did the grape refuse a hug?
Because it didn’t want to get crushed!
I got a part time job at a recycling center, crushing aluminum pop cans before they were melted down. I only lasted a few days. It was soda pressing.
Did you hear about the new restaurant called Karma? There’s no menu, you get what you deserve.
I have a phobia of over-engineered buildings.
It's a complex complex complex.
I saw a book titled "Solve 50% of Your Problems".
I bought two.
Why can’t cats play poker in the jungle?
Too many cheetahs!!!!!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A Meowtain
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
FROSTBITE
I had a date with a vampire once ...
... it sucked.
Wood fired pizza? Poor pizza. Where’s pizza going to get a job?
We all know that Bruce Lee was fast, but did you know he had a brother was even faster?
His name was Sudden Lee
Give a man a gun and he will rob a bank. Give a man a bank and he will rob everyone.
What kind of dog doesn’t bark?
A hushpuppy! 🐶
Why would you tell me to drop my dad, Jokes is a good man!
I accidentally sprayed deodorant in my mouth today..
Now when I talk, I have this weird Axe scent..
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