My two cents: I agree that a photo would be necessary to cuddle with a stranger from the internet no matter how good the vibes feel from typing to each other. On the other hand for those who feel a photo is not needed prior to meeting I wish you good luck.
I would never meet someone if they didn't ask to see me first. What kind of person would do that? I'd automatically think nefarious reasons. I'd think they come prepared for bad things.
Bottom line here is everyone is free to set their own boundaries. If you're ok meeting a random person from the Internet for a cuddle, sight unseen, that's certainly your prerogative. But please don't try to convince people they're being silly, or that it doesn't really make you more secure, or that it shouldn't be required of a platonic relationship to require a photo. "Platonic" simply means "not of a sexual nature". It doesn't remove attractiveness or sense of humor or anything else as a criteria by which we choose the people we want to spend our time with.
i just cancel someone because I asked 3 times to see a picture and he threw a tantrum.....big red flag,I dodged a bullet.
👍👍👍👍
@Ell24 Yeah, those tantrums usually ARE a red flag. Good on you for cancelling!😁
Exchanging pics prior to meeting an interwebs stranger seems a no brainer non issue to most with common sense
@pmvines Yep, it does. 😁
@Ell24 - Should of told him that he needs to be 18 to be on this site. Only children throws tantrums over something silly.
For the women concerned about pics prior to meeting it seems mostly due to safety reasons in case something goes sideways. For the men concerned about pics it seems mostly to do with attractiveness of the woman they are going to meet. Just look at all the threads on here about being "catfished" because they seemed older , or heavier, she didn't wear the same kind of makeup or wear same type of clothes or smile as much or use the same kind of filters. Not too many women starting these type of threads. Priorities....
@pmvines
Common sense says if someone shows up and they are not recognizable using the photo they provided that there will be no session.
@Rezz Marvelous common sense to have, never lose it!😁
I avoided a dangerous member here who used the same photo in his profile as the one used on my local news for his multiple pending kidnapping, assault and rape charges. He has since been found guilty and is thankfully locked up.
@Rezz. Wow! 😳
See, it's experiences like THIS ^^^ that keeps me firmly planted on MY BOUNDARY of NO (RECENT) PHOTO, NO CUDDLING! Thanks for sharing that and glad to know that Dude is behind bars. 😁👍
Should of told him that he needs to be 18 to be on this site. Only children throws tantrums over something silly.
@Mike403 😁👍
@Mike403 if the forums here have taught us anything tantrums are not limited to children.
On the other hand for those who feel a photo is not needed prior to meeting I wish you good luck.
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@gem7 I wish them the same!😁
Not sure why physical attraction is a factor for most people, but for me, pictures are purely for safety. I've cuddled with people of all races, shapes, sizes, etc. I need to have a face and name because I myself offer my face and name. Social chemistry doesn't require physical attraction in my opinion. Wish other people shared my view, but to each their own.
"Platonic" simply means "not of a sexual nature".
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HA! YA SEE THAT^^^ INTERNET DUDEBROS AND DUDEBRAS... THAT'S WHAT PLATONIC ACTUALLY MEANS!
@justageekboy Thanks so much for that definition, many many many many many MANY MANY MANY MANY 🙄😏🤦...Just don't get what platonic means! So thank you again for getting it!😁🫂
I certainly appreciate all the thought put into the responses to my post.
The question I read was Do you require to see a person’s face?
Someone refusing to send their picture is a different matter than some one requiring it.
Perhaps some of you can’t see the distinction through your emotional responses-
Certainly someone refusing to send their picture when requested could be seen as a serious Red Flag particularly for female Pros in regards to safety.
I still don’t subscribe to the thought that the picture they send you guarantees anything other than they sent you a picture.
The extremely passionate theme seems to be -it is absolutely necessary to insure security.
I disagree and like many topics on this forum -that is upsetting to some people. I incidentally am not at all upset that many people disagree with my opinion. Not at all.
There are other effective ways to insure security as we all know- Meet and Greets in public- Chatting on the phone if both parties are comfortable with that level of screening. Some people prefer to speak to a person as way to gauge whether there would be a good fit.
To those who suggest I am telling people how they should conduct their security measures -I think it is clear you are projecting. I am thoroughly enjoying life and allowing people to think and do what they want is something we all should strive for.
I simply gave an opinion on whether the REAL reason people want to see pictures is actually for security.
For some I have no doubt it is.
For others it may be they Actually do care about the appearance of the people they cuddle.
It seems there are Female Pros having dramatically different experiences on this site.
Anyone assaulting or intending to assault women should be dealt with swiftly and forcefully. I am quite sure all Male members would agree with that-
As I have said many times-We all should do what we see fit to insure our safety. Particularly Female cuddlers.
Not all Female Pros feel the same level of anxiety meeting with clients and the screening process will vary from Pro to Pro
If there are actual CRIMINALS on the site that you are seeing on TV- That is a much deeper issue than a profile photo.
We should find out if that individual met with other Pros and if they are OK.
@BrianOcean i don't know if i had an emotional response, but i often don't read comments prior to me responding to the OP. Because there isn't much anyone is going to say that's going to influence my thoughts in most subjects. I also don't intend to influence others.i share my POV because I'm comfortable with it. If there are questions i don't understand for example legal situations i seek clarifications through the comments, but there are few that I'd consider for valuable thought and commentary. Again we may not agree on things but most times i wouldn't know. @BrianOcean i am not necessarily responding to your comment although i did happen to read it.
@BrianOcean We may not agree entirely on this specific aspect but we are all on the same team when it comes to the purpose of this site and cuddling. Everyone has the autonomy and empowerment to choose their boundaries and that includes screening preferences. I’m not sure where you’re construing responses as emotional, however. This is the interwebs and atleast for me - isn’t that deep. Someone disagreeing and sharing why they disagree may be seen as emotional but I often think especially the female gender are assigned an “emotional” title when really they’re just sharing their thoughts. Just an observation from my own review of the discussion within this thread.
@4cuddles @Katota Here is an article about him where he admits if that if he wasn't caught that he would continue to lure women online. https://www.wsmv.com/2024/05/02/sex-offender-admits-he-was-surprised-that-nashville-police-didnt-arrest-him-earlier/?outputType=amp
I was fortunate to recognize his punchable face in his profile pic.
@BrianOcean
There are other effective ways to insure security as we all know- Meet and Greets in public- Chatting on the phone if both parties are comfortable with that level of screening
I'm not wasting gas money and a perfectly good afternoon to meet anyone in person to confirm their identity when they can take 2 seconds to send a pic. Chatting on the phone does not give me a visual representation of who you are or give me time to check to ensure you don't have a mile long criminal history.
The mod who took my report said I was the only pro he had messaged. He was immediately banned following my report.
@Rezz - His lawyer argued that he has Autism Spectrum Disorder. I have autism and would never even think about doing what he did. The symptom of autism is struggles with social interaction. It doesn't make you commit crimes. Whenever they try to use that defense, it makes everyone with that diagnoses look bad.
@Mike403 I have a few clients with diagnosed autism. All are wonderful humans. That trash does not represent anyone but himself.
@Mike403 also an autistic girly and would never EVER harm another living creature or person, that defense makes me literally sick. using any disability or handicap as a justification to harm anything or anyone is just a tactic, and harms the entire mental health, physical and mental disability, communities. this is why so many conditions and profiles are stigmatized.
@Rezz 👏 👏 👏 👏 mic drop
@skyhighsugar Men are quite capable of emotional responses-Just read some the posts on these forums. If a person [not you specifically] takes that as some type of gender directed statement-That is really on them.
The question was Do people require a photo to meet?
The question was not- is refusing to send a photo when requested a safety concern.
People read and see what they want instead of what is there sometimes
@Rezz- Definitely glad you are OK and you have an extremely valid reason for requesting a photo. It is obviously for security in your case.
@BrianOcean I don't think it's that "People read and see what they want instead of what is there sometimes" so much (though your inclusion of the word "sometimes" certainly allows for it). It seems most (?) forum questions diverge from the original question. It's simply the nature of the beast and developing conversations.
I agree, @jimmylee, it is unlikely that people are going to answer a question, and refrain from adding in what to them are related points. As you say, "nature of the beast," versus say a court of law ... and from what I've seen often not even then.
So far as boundaries go, if someone's boundary is to not provide a picture, I respect that person's boundary and move on without acrimony. 🙂
@BrianOcean I believe that the conversation ended up having more of an emphasis on the idea of safety when you challenged the validity of it being a safety issue. To the point that someone even presented evidence where the photo present, the very safety feature you seemed to question.
I can't believe all that say it's for a security reason don't understand what @BrianOcean, me and few other people write here every now and then.
By the way, think about it: who is going to modify a picture so you (and police) are not able to use it to identify the person depicted in? A criminal or an innocent cuddler? You are putting red flags where there aren't and missing red flags just because they give you a (useless) picture. And for what it's worth, if you get your peace of mind until the day of the meeting, in which you can see the picture doesn't match the person, you can agree with me that meeting in person it is the only factor that should be taken into consideration.
@goodbyehug: the day of the meeting each one writes "I'm the one dressed in xyz" and/or a distinctive detail of where they are waiting for the other one. But you can also ask somebody to have a sheet with your name on like at the airport, if the other one agrees.
@KuddlyKoala: and why is a picture more trustworthy for you than conversations and in-person meeting?
@CuddleDuncan: Famous people are more protected about their pictures, because other people recognize them. If someone uses a famous actor image, somebody can tell them. If somebody is using my picture (without my consent), the chances that I will know it are very few. The correlation you tell about is statistics, but it's not a rule. There can be people who are honest cuddlers and can have their reasons not to spread their pictures. And since even for those that provide pictures the check hasn't ended (and those who don't make further checks and only trust others because of the picture can't say they are safe), the question always boils down to the same: the only safety rule that holds is meeting in person.
@JLM: this applies for you but not for everybody. Given that meeting in public I've seen the face before cuddling, since I was interested in cuddling, I didn't care about her face. This adds genuinity to the cuddling, from my point of view.
I'm not wasting gas money and a perfectly good afternoon to meet anyone in person to confirm their identity when they can take 2 seconds to send a pic
@Rezz: Instead I think you really should. If he sent you a picture of anyone else you don't know (and can't find in internet) and you met him in a motel instead of in a public place? Can you imagine what could have happened to you if you only trusted the picture?
I can give you my name and surname, that you can check on my ID when we meet in public. But after reading the odyssey of a girl which had to struggle with the police to get her fake profiles removed from many dating apps because their pictures were used without her consent, I don't need to make the mistake to become aware of the danger. Her "mistake" (innocent but costly) is enough for me to learn.
I have cuddled with 2 people met here, without pictures involved. We met in a public place, spend the afternoon together and then cuddled overnight. @Rezz showed us that some dangerous people share their pictures to gain trust. So there are good people who don't like to share pictures and bad people that don't care about sharing pictures. I repeat, since someone doesn't understand, your safety is important and you should check ensure it by checking elements that are not easy to fake like a picture.
@Falco - If the person doesn't match the photo, she leaves and no session takes place. If she never enters the room, it will be much easier to make an escape.
@Falco LOL I think I literally "laughed out load" on your last post. "I can't believe all that say it's for a security reason don't understand what @BrianOcean, me and few other people write here every now and then." Let's talk about "understanding" for a minute.
Understanding #1 - I don't understand why you took the time to write that tome. Really? Why do you even care. It doesn't impact you. They require a photo; you don't. Live and let live.
Understanding #2 - I don't think you (and those you seem to speak for) understand a key feature. I'm going out on a limb here, but I don't think those who you are deriding really care what you think. If requiring a photo gives them a greater sense of safety, so be it. I'm not going to address the validity (one way or the other) of the points of your argument. Why? As I already said ... it doesn't matter and I get the sense that folks just don't care.
That said, it is a public forum, and you are entitled to your opinion. I can respect and honor that. It would be grand if you would do the same towards those who hold an opposing view than your own.
@Rezz
There's a cuddle comfort blacklist? I know the term, am curious on how this is used, and who decides. (Is this like a credit report I wonder?)