Do Opposites Still Attract?

dennis22554dennis22554
in General

Let me start by saying--I am absolutely clear that CC is NOT a dating site! With that said, differences in opinion came to the surface in a public CC forum leading to the loss of a CC session and wishes of my personal demise. Now neither of these are tragic events, it did lead me to wonder if Opposites still Attract or in this new dating world--do you have to date people only with same mindset and is it a cardinal sin if you "cross lanes." Personally I do think it's tragic to think opposites, if that is the case, given some of the best relationships I have had are from people with completely different views on a number of subjects. These opposites spiced up the relationship, always lead to entertainment, and resulted in very passionate relationships, because despite the differences, respect always remained.Things are so bad lately I am almost wonder if differing views be among the questions addressed when one populated a CC profile. So---can opposites still attract or do we have to boring lives where everyone thinks the same way. Feel free to share your opposite relationship stories. Should CC profiles contain additional warnings? Seems silly to dismiss have a potential business base only because not everyone is a drone. This is meant to be a lighthearted post but I am, seriously looking for answers.

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Comments

  • SleepySheep1SleepySheep1

    It’s true that many people find value in relationships with those who hold contrasting views, but that's usually because they already have a base of trust, have had life experiences with them, and shared values for a strong foundation.

    They were not strangers, who had never interacted, and didn't have any of the same shared values- which is mostly the case for a new potential cuddle partner or romantic partner.

    It’s important to remember that no one is entitled to anyone’s time or attention. What may seem trivial to you could be significant to someone else. At the end of the day, you could be the juiciest peach, but not everyone likes peaches.

    Trying to guess why someone chooses not to engage or why they have different preferences can lead to unnecessary frustration. Everyone has their own valid reasons, even if they don’t align with yours. I think its best to respect those differences and focus on connections that feel right for both parties.

  • dennis22554dennis22554

    I want to thank you for a very thoughtful reply..its absolutely true..everyone is free to pick and chose partners and there should never be resentment. The question originates from curiosity one I really had not given much thought to until recently. I never deliberately try to find differences..but it always works out that way. It still amazes me how much hatred resides in society when people think differently

  • [Deleted User]WriterGF (deleted user)

    It's an extremely polarized society in many ways, not just the obvious ones.

  • whoismaryamswhoismaryams

    For me, no, opposites do not attract in romantic relationships. I have to agree with someone on communication styles, temperament, living conditions, finances, basic human rights, health standards, etc. I don't live in fantasyland. I'm a grown woman and love doesn't conquer all. I've only been cuddling 1 1/2 months so I don't get too into the weeds about people and their personal lives. I keep it light and easy in conversations and I have no idea what their true beliefs are. But honestly, if I did find out what they believed about certain topics that made me uncomfortable, no, I would not feel safe cuddling and would not see them.

  • JustOnceJustOnce

    My ex and I are opposites, in many ways. He's a hater and I'm a lover, he's a meat lover and I'm vegan. Our values didn't align among other things so I had to end the relationship. I'm open minded and love to see different perspectives so I don't just stay in my lane.

  • dennis22554dennis22554

    @just..happy to see your open minded to different perspectives. That's were the post is centered...not simply dismissing someone because you think differently..the post is not focused on extreme differences

  • IronicMaidenIronicMaiden

    It depends on which way people are opposites. Different opinions of the best type of fiction can lead to discussions and broadening of horizons. But if your opposite means you're incapable of respecting someone else's personhood, best to stay far away.

  • dennis22554dennis22554

    Very true

  • [Deleted User]CharlesGrove (deleted user)

    I’m not certain that anyone truly understands how attraction works.

    It seems to enjoy creating chaos… but that might just be my feelings having watched others deal with it. B

  • DirkSavageDirkSavage
    edited January 2025

    .......................

  • lovingspoonfulllovingspoonfull
    edited January 2025

    I think the concept that opposites attract is based on a false presupposition. “Opposites” are nothing more than people who fit on a spectrum of human experience and behavior that choose to value and emphasize different aspects of it.

    No one is truly “opposite” because no one is truly that one dimensional.

    With that basic understanding it’s only natural for curiosity and the joy of discovery to make you interested in getting to know more about someone who is very different than yourself.

    I’d consider that normal. And healthy.

    But what leads to a real relationship is more than initial attraction. The attraction is a spark that captures interest. That’s it.

    The relationship that arises from it can be built on a number of things. Hopefully that initial attraction finds fertile ground for real respect and deep affection.

  • ReltvlyCanshesReltvlyCanshes

    Very interesting thought. I never thought they really did with people, i mean there are some opposing thoughts but i believe people are attracted by like minds and experiences. But as for the state of this these days is probably the polarization of everything is repelling stronger that the attraction. So one point of opposition and i will never consider you a friend. I don't dislike or anything like that but i need to trust someone's intelligence and intentions and i don't think these things line up. I also don't think there is anything wrong with that.

  • FitSmartCuddlerFitSmartCuddler

    Short answer: "It depends." I'm not a country music fan. If I was with someone who was wonderful in every way except she liked to listen to country music, I could probably live with that. But if she had Confederate flag stickers on her car and regularly complained that Lincoln was a tyrant and repeated far-right talking points from Sean Hannity, Alex Jones and Steve Bannon, that wouldn't work for me.

  • Janelle19Janelle19

    Opposites, no
    Complimenting the other with strengths they may not have a vise versa, yes

  • KatotaKatota
    edited January 2025

    Do Opposites Still Attract?

    This is the extent of my comment (and answer) to the title question at hand. 😊👍

  • JackNJJackNJ
    edited January 2025

    This question looks like and can go in many different ways of the question do opposites attract. In so many ways. Yes they can. Some minor differences between myself and others was I had someone that I once was with that started off as friends, we became cuddlers, and then it led to more, but it wasn’t no one from this site and wasn’t even happening at the time that I use this site. I was pretty much blue-collar, most of my life working in a dirty garage, warehouses, construction site, seaports. I was an operations manager for more than 20+ years for a freight forwarding company, she was a professional working in a corporate setting with a very high position within her company. I was a meat and potatoes guy, she was salads and all about eating healthy. I was into watching football, and hanging out at the local dive bar, she was all about working out and going to ballet’s. I guess you could say we had more of a fling than anything and we both know it wouldn’t work long-term, but it was fun times with her when we were together. Those are just a few small examples of the difference between her and I.

  • btc13btc13

    I think that in general, the way people get into relationships these days is very different than before. Before they tended to be more organic and people would tend to know more about each other before moving into a different level of relationship. Nowadays it is more a la carte. You look at the superficial, not just appearance but also surface level preferences and swipe left or swipe right.

  • dennis22554dennis22554

    I wanted to add additional post clarification..today there is often a label with being different...for
    example a person who hates eating Asian food may be labeled as someone who hates everything asian...where In fact that's completely untrue..its just an assumption

  • dennis22554dennis22554

    In what is supposed to be..a new accepting society..false labels repackage

  • IronicMaidenIronicMaiden

    What does that have to do with "do opposites still attract?"

  • SleepySheep1SleepySheep1

    @dennis22554

    While misunderstandings or isolated instances of overgeneralization might occur, they are not the norm and certainly not a widespread societal behavior. Most individuals are capable of distinguishing between personal taste and prejudice.

    People generally recognize that personal preferences, such as food choices, are separate from broader attitudes toward a culture or group.

    This kind of extreme assumption is not something that happens in any meaningful or widespread way. Suggesting otherwise is an overreach that simply doesn’t align with how people actually think or behave in the real world.

  • TxTomTxTom

    Do Opposites Still Attract?

    Yes, if they're compatible.

  • dennis22554dennis22554

    Labeling and the negative assumptions with those labels keeps discriminatory practices alive..if you don,t have first hand knowledge about a person..then assumptions..labels should be avoided

  • IronicMaidenIronicMaiden

    Given the increasing amount of anti-LGBT prejudice and discrimination, all based entirely on how someone was born, I have to agree.

  • btc13btc13

    Increasing? Alan Turing's ghost would like to discuss that with you.

  • [Deleted User]CharlesGrove (deleted user)

    Which is more irritating?

    Negative generalizations, or positive generalizations?

    I prefer negative generalizations. They feel more useful.

  • IronicMaidenIronicMaiden

    @btc13

    Increasing? Alan Turing's ghost would like to discuss that with you.

    Tell him to meet me in Florida.

  • JSP_1JSP_1

    "Opposites attract" is about dimorphism, not about beliefs or opinions imho

  • dennis22554dennis22554

    I would disagree

  • btc13btc13

    @IronLemon In FL? Where my brother is happily married to his husband? Something that could not have happened 20 years ago?

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