Falling for my cuddler

[Deleted User]DMB41FAN (deleted user)
in General

I’ve had have several sessions with my cuddler and there is just something about how I feel when I’m with them. I’m constantly thinking about them and wish I could be around them all the time. Idk if this is normal or not. I’m very new to the cuddling game. I don’t know what I should do.

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Comments

  • HappyHikesHappyHikes

    Thank her/him for your time together, tell her/him that you will never forget the great times you have had with them ... and then never contact them again.

  • SpaceGoatSpaceGoat
    edited September 2025

    It is normal! Your brain gets as lot of good feelings from touch and cuddles.

    It helps to remind yourself this is a professional relationship and seeing a different cuddler every now and then.

  • CuddlesofcuddleCuddlesofcuddle

    Maybe make distance. You don't wanna fall for your cuddler

  • Carrie_AnneCarrie_Anne

    This attachment could cause a lot of problems if you’re already in a relationship with someone else. I agree with others, put some space between yourself and the Cuddler.

  • CuddlesComfort8CuddlesComfort8

    Very, very normal for your brain, and potentially heart, to start feeling something for a cuddler, especially if you’re only meeting with the one person. This is why it’s important to have a bit of a rotation. Cuddling can bring up emotions that may have been missing in the past, however, cuddling through here is meant to be relaxing and comforting in a platonic environment, so I would ere on the side of caution here and tread carefully.

    She/he may not feel the same, and then you could lose your cuddle buddy. I would suggest taking a break for a while, maybe find another person or 2 for sessions, and then come back to your original cuddler if you feel you can do so.

  • AmberUKAmberUK

    Yeah sometimes those chemicals can kick in real strong. Sometimes you crash afterwards. But best to keep reminding yourself that it’s purely platonic.
    Find a second cb to try and dilute it?

  • AuroradreamAuroradream

    Sometimes that sort of attachment happens and I usually chalk it up to a rookie mistake. Your profile is ten years old on the join date, so you can't be all that naive. I think the advice others are giving is solid but I would add that aside from taking a little space or rotating to another cuddle buddy, consider just having a talk about it. Maybe a coffee visit or on the phone but not by text and not during a cuddle session. Good luck 👍🏻

  • PeopleLikeUsPeopleLikeUs

    You should be able to catch feelings for a cuddler and maintain a functional companionship regardless. For me, love is a prerequisite for friendship. I love all of my friends. Once I started doing it that way, my life improved.

  • CuddleHideawayCuddleHideaway

    Perhaps I missed something. From the comments it seems most are are assuming the beloved cuddler is a pro. Could be another enthusiast, which puts things in a different category.

  • BearBear

    If you can rotate Cuddle buddy. Also taking a break from that person in general for a while.

  • pmvinespmvines
    edited September 2025

    Your profile says you joined in 2015 but cuddling is very new to you and you haven't already seen other threads that deal with this topic ? Forgive me I'm not trying to minimize your situation just an observation.

    My thoughts are that if you are conflicted about your feelings and feel it's not appropriate and not reciprocal then you owe it to both of you to detach and cease seeing them. Otherwise you're going to be torturing yourself by continuing to cuddle someone you have unrequited feelings for. And you risk possibly messing up a friendship.

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    Your profile says you joined in 2015 but cuddling is very new to you and you haven't already seen other threads that deal with this topic ?

    No time like the present to experience befuddlement.

  • mauvefoxmauvefox

    I will say that the "joined" date is the very first time you opened a profile. I have met a few people (myself included) that created a profile, almost immediately deactivated (but not deleted) and then returned at a later date. The joined date still uses the original profile creation date. So while it's possible they've been here for the last ten years, it's also possible they joined, left without exploring it, and are now just returning.

    @CuddleHideaway
    a slightly different category in that if it is another enthusiast, then they are not paying. But either way, this is not a dating site. So still risky to catch serious feelings for your cuddle partner.

    Of course it can happen. Cuddling skips a whole bunch of steps of intimacy with a person while intentionally not exploring others. It can be confusing.

    Others have suggested having multiple cuddlers and that might really be the best advice, to help normalize the experience for you and also to not become too dependent on one person for meeting snuggle needs.

  • CuddleHideawayCuddleHideaway

    @mauvefox I.did not mean to imply this site should be used as a dating option (which many have). I simply was pointing out that the OP was not clear on the exact nature of the cuddling arrangement, and that should be considered. The advice given here by most have been solid. But the nature of the pro vs enthusiast is quite different on so many levels.

  • mauvefoxmauvefox

    @CuddleHideaway
    Interesting. What different advice would you give if the OPs partner was also an enthusiast?

  • Darkeyed_maleDarkeyed_male
    edited September 2025

    It's OK to be human. We feel things wanted or unwanted. Cold turkey works for some but not everyone. My advice, be strong. That means be in control of your feelings. It can be done. Category thinking helps. (This means make it your goal to be the best version of you. This puts falling for someone else a lesser version of you. Not weaker, lesser)

    Look in the mirror at your profile now tilt your chin upward and inhale..think of this when you feel yourself falling for a person. (I know it sounds silly) this adjustment will firm your resolve and adjust your outlook.

    Now assume this person is going through the same growth and your feelings will sit into their proper place, a prized respect. Respect for another is so much more powerful than an adoration.

    Hope this helps.

  • Jose350Jose350

    It's never a good idea to repeat cuddlers if you're someone that gets attached too easily.Always have a rotation. Because you know what they say, once you repeat, you will fall in deep. 😉

  • CuddleHideawayCuddleHideaway

    @mauvefox I don't think I would add that much. I was thinking that the advice to cut off contact and find a different cuddler was a bit rushed (if both are enthusiast). There should be openness and honesty about your feeling, but who knows, maybe the other enthusiast is feeling something mutual. Nothing wrong with that. Yes, not why one should enter into this community, but it happens. I have other thoughts, but not ones I care to share in these forums.

  • CuddleHideawayCuddleHideaway

    So, we've heard from one side of the street. How about the other? What would the group suggest if the pro develops feelings for the enthusiast and the enthusiast knows it? Don't bother with what the pro should do - that seems pretty obvious (one of two main options).

  • PrincssbrbestarPrincssbrbestar

    I agree with everyone's statements, set clear boundries and meet new people/cuddlers to rotate😊

  • iamnobodyiamnobody

    careful about the rules and boundaries yes, don't let them get fuzzy. Talk to the cuddler that you are with get on the same page.

  • iamnobodyiamnobody

    Oh nevermind op was kicked off the site :( Best luck to you

  • jonnyquestjonnyquest

    @DMB41FAN,that's a bridge that sooner or later everyone,pro or enthusiast may have to cross..Those feelings are perfectly natural.But if I were you I'd tell the person you've cuddled with that what my feelings were and never see them again.Or at least take a break from them.What I do to try to avoid this is just have 1-3 sessions in a month with different pros then take a break for 2-3 months..Truthfully I've had pros suggest meeting more often because cuddling is their main source of income but I've told them if I were to see the same pro a few times a month for say a year sooner or later one of us might start catching feelings.While I'm sure that's happened and it turned into a relationship,it's really not what this is about...@CuddleHideaway that's an interesting question,like I said earlier the more times you cuddle,pro or enthusiast,the closer you get to that bridge you may have to cross.

  • cheekydreamercheekydreamer
    edited September 2025

    There is nothing wrong with that. Just remember it’s transactional, and your cuddler probably gives the same or even better experiences to others. It’s all transactional, enjoy the relaxation and dopamine release, don’t get attached.

  • wilderdudewilderdude

    @iamnobody i imagine he nuked his account himself, and this was a 'burner' account to ask this question. don't think he would've asked this using his main account on here as his primary cuddler would've seen it and it would've been weird.

  • Carrie_AnneCarrie_Anne

    OP also left his status blank which is intentional and generally means he’s married or in a relationship which also adds another interesting element to his post. (None of it good imo.)

  • great_pillow08great_pillow08

    I'm not even a little bit meaning to brag, but I have multiple cuddle buddies from this site and a few of them are QUITE addictive. Rotating doesn't help me, neither does "time apart". I hate how immature this is going to sound, but I went "boy crazy" for 4 days (if he sees this- just know you're appreciated!). I woke up thinking about him, I missed exits on my way home from work thinking about him.. It was crazy, but after a few days I was "me" again. Now the thought of cuddling with them again is just "comforting", but my cuddle buddies are cherished and because of that, there are lines I WON'T cross. I've met with a pro multiple times before and he's made it clear he wants to be more than cuddle buddies, but we're not compatible otherwise. It's a boundary you have to make for and be willing and able to enforce yourself, and if you can't, then you need to cut ties.

  • Bodhi777Bodhi777
    edited September 2025

    _>

  • jps76jps76

    The cuddler's join date shouldn't matter. Why presume they would be active in the forums?

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    Why presume they would be active in the forums?

    You’re right. They might have been at the gym all this time. That’s a more likely place to be active.

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