No show, last minute cancelations

Comments

• tacpmurg

  March 30

  I asked if she can respect the agreed sesh.

  Thats.. but why? Shes not flipping you a burger , you guys will be cuddling. What would you get out of a session you pressured someone "to honor"? Like.. awkward.
• BlueIris Mod

  March 30

  You can report her. If a pro is reported multiple times for last-minute cancellations, she can be permanently escorted off the site.
• Bear

  March 30

  When I was newer I probably would have let it slide. I don’t do too many pro sessions lately. Yet if I was told they just woke up and wasn’t feeling it, I’d probably report them.

  That’s happened to me in regards to work. I call in and just say I’m not feeling well. Otherwise, I’d probably get written up for saying I’m not feeling it and I’m not coming in.
• marcustanaka

  March 30

  When you talked, she was interested. There was no real commitment and her mood changed; she already got the attention she wanted. Just because this is a cuddling site does not mean the laws of nature do not apply. Your male friends who date have the similar stories from the women they meet.

  Keep your expectations low. Don't drag out texting before meeting in person. Keep your commitment level the same as hers. You are desperate to cuddle; she has 10 guys messaging her every day. If this bothered you that much, a pro has a financial incentive to keep an appointment.
• Jubal

  March 30

  If you're not out any money, then count your blessings that you're only out the time you spent. If you look through the forums, there's plenty of posts regarding deposits & prepayments that were gone forever when the pro cancelled.

  It's life, such things happen.
• PurpleApplesz

  March 30

  Unfortunately, this happens from time to time. I just went thru a situation whwre we had a booking but she stopped replying after the booking. Luckily, the scheduled day was far out
• Kempist

  March 30

  "was already ready to drive to her."

  I always confirm right before I leave and won't leave until I hear back. Be thankful you didn't drive there before it was cancelled. I drove forty five minutes once and got a text five minutes before the start time that she had to cancel. My drive time limit is usually thirty minutes. This is part of the reason why.
• biancalovecraft

  March 30

  A lot of people don't believe this but:
  It's really hard to do a cuddle when you don't want to.
  And the why doesn't matter really. Could be you could be her could be something in the air.
  I'm extremely selective about accepting first appointments, and that's why. I don't want to cancel and disappoint anybody because I'm feeling hesitant because of any reason. I'm also not going to White knuckle through a cuddle, it's not fair to the client, or good for me.
  I guess it's kind of a bummer to be a paying customer and still need enthusiastic buy-in from the provider, but it's a sensitive business.
  Try another pro and try to establish enthusiastic buy-in.
• Huggycatbear

  March 30 edited March 30

  Unfortunately, this is one of those things where when it repeatedly happens with diff people, it gets old.

  I am not a fan when someone cancels last minute without a reason. The scheduling can be such a headache. It lacks consideration of my time, especially as a host who has to make my own preparations.

  I will write off the cuddler as a waste of time.

  The one area that is gray is if the cuddler just doesn't feel comfortable from whatever vibe she might feel in particular. Gut instincts are important. But I would hope they could still reach out and say they don't feel it's a right time or something like that. Here is where feelings is a very credible excuse.

  But communication matters.
• disneysamurai

  March 30

  You said that you didn’t exchange pictures because she didn’t ask, but at the same time you don’t have any pictures of you on your profile.

  I’m not saying this is the reason, but I wouldn’t rule out that it’s possible not having a clear, recent picture of you on your profile is causing pros to think twice about meeting up.
• CuddleDuncan Mod

  March 30

  It's extremely common for both professionals and enthusiasts to decline to meet somebody without a clear, recent face photo.

  If you don't have a photo on your profile, it's common to include one in your first message, or your first message after their reply, without being asked.

  It's common for people not to send a photo straight away, but to do so immediately upon being asked.

  Not sending a recent, clear photo immediately when asked (or a very clear and simple explanation why you'd prefer not to) turns out to be a red flag. I've already seen this a number of times even as a new Moderator. Problems about the photo seems to mean problems in general.

  ---

  I have also observed in my short Moderating life that many of the problems around last minute cancellation are one of communication more than the actual cancellation itself.

  It's one thing to receive, ten minutes before you were due to set out:

  Hi, I'm really sorry I have to cancel our cuddle today. Some personal stuff came up suddenly, I won't bore you with the details. I appreciate this is very short notice and is going to disrupt your day and I wouldn't do it if there was a realistic alternative. I don't have time to think of a new plan right now, but I have cancelled the site Booking so there is no problem over the site's fee, and I will message you tomorrow with a proposal for a new date. Apologies again.

  And quite another to get, ten minutes after you did set out:

  Yeah, not gonna make it today
• VAdude

  March 30

  Can you really not type out the full word "session"?
• FLCuddleQueen

  March 30

  As a well seasoned professional here, I feel that canceling a session last minute without a valid reason is completely unacceptable. At the same time some people just give off weird vibes. Even through text message! This is not exclusive to clients or pros, as it can happen to anyone.

  Although I don't cancel sessions, unless a client is weird with me or states something inappropriate prior to our session. I do follow the protocol with a picture and at least a little conversation to make sure we are comfortable with each other. I also don't like to have session scheduled out too far, because that leaves room for people to cancel or possibly forget. I do allow appointments to be scheduled out if there is an appropriate reason like they are coming from out of town or financial situations.

  I can understand the clients frustration here with feeling very letdown, especially when they are excited about a session. So I really feel like this is a situation where it just kind of comes with the territory. I have been stood up on multiple occasions by people who were so excited for a session who didn't even bother to tell me they weren't coming. That's probably one of the rudest things to deal with aside from the perverts on here. (Don't get me started on the pervs 😂)

  This is why we have karma! How else are we supposed to know how each other behaves if the people that interact with us don't report that? I would much rather know that a client is flaky and did a no call no-show instead of reading all of the wonderful karma about them from the people that had good experiences.

  A lot of people think that this is an easy business, but it absolutely is not. The hourly rate makes it look extremely appealing, but there is a lot of time invested, as well as emotional investment for some people. It can also be extremely mentally and physically taxing.

  I think the bottom line is here. We need to give each other grace when it is deserved, leave karma's that appropriately reflect sessions and communicate with each other properly.

  Anyhow… That's my two cents lol
  ❤️ FQC 🫶🏻
• Carrie_Anne

  March 30 edited March 30

  @summerson
  Yes it’s annoying when this happens but what it really means is that Pro wasn’t right for you and just move on.
  if happening multiple times with different Pros, maybe there are some red flags 🚩 🚩 🚩?
  To me, a Pro who isn’t asking the usual questions, not requiring a photo, not doing any screening….
  And I know there are some Pros who don’t require a photo but they do screening calls or meet in person first or require ID.
  Anyway, don’t we all need to be cautious (and not desperately in a rush!) when choosing a Pro or Client. Know what to look for and have realistic expectations of the people we choose to cuddle (based on a few clues and there are many clues in profiles!).
• Huggycatbear

  March 30

  @FLCuddleQueen Wow... just wow.

  In an extremelly well-written manner, you mirror my thoughts and feelings. I love how you encourage mutual respect for both sides. It really shows that you are someone who cares about fairness with tenderness.

  Sometimes this the messages in this forum make it out that one side is to be guilty until proven innocent.

  I will do my best to follow your advice and give the appropriate karma as it seems fair to do so even before the session if the scheduling falls through at the last minute wirhout communication.

  Thank you so much for taking account someone's excitement when looking forward to a session, only to turn to disappointment when someone ghosts or flakes at the last minute.
• Sunrise_Snuggle

  March 30 edited March 30

  I write negative Karma for no shows and last minute cancelations. I haven't had it happen with a pro yet. But I have had it happen with enthusiasts. There was one in particular that canceled with 15 minutes notice when I had a 90-minute drive. And they confirmed before I began my drive, and even confirmed a second time in the middle of my drive. Then they claimed "something came up." I can't stand time wasters.
• summerson

  April 4

  @BlueIris @Bear thanks. i reported as per the advise.

  @marcustanaka This is not a dating site, and I am not sitting around texting. I don't walk around with teenager's brain i pay for the service that i get; a little chat is just to make the meeting comfortable to both the parties.

  @Jubal @PurpleApplesz @Kempist ofc, i am glad that i didn't drive or paid any advance

  @biancalovecraft @FLCuddleQueen @Carrie_Anne Thanks for the understanding and great points. I see maturity and professionalism in your approach.

  @disneysamurai @CuddleDuncan I have no problem sharing my pic when asked. Trust me, I have met a couple of cuddlers that had not even cared to visit my profile ahead of the scheduled session. I was really surprised how much they cared about their safety considering there was literally no vetting process. When I asked them during the session if they visited my profile, they simply apologized for not checking.

  @Huggycatbear @CuddleDuncan, You are spot on. it was not about the cancellation itself, it was the way the cancellation was communicated. The draft message you posted is perfect, that pros should start using it.

  @Sunrise_Snuggle, you are right in giving a bad karma to enthusiasts that cancels the appt last minute. But in my case it was a pro and i didn't want to write a bad karma, given that i had not driven 45 minutes or had paid an advance. But i did report them to the site.

  Appreciated all the responses.