@ubergigglefritz - yeah i knew the difference had to be that you are paid & i am not open to being paid to cuddle .. it’s totally fine; once again to each it’s own. & no matter if you use analogies or not .. people will do what they want to do .. well let’s hope none of your partners lead to divorce papers.
@ivlegend - i get you, and i’m happy you compensate them well!
If any of my clients end up getting divorced, that is from a problem within their own relationship and their ability to solve their conflicts. That is not the service I provide. I am there to support and encourage, but am not a marriage or individual counselor. All of who I would consider current clients (and all but one of my clients in entirety who are married) are very happily married. Getting their cuddle needs met with me allows them to be able to be happy with their spouse and not be stressed out or focused on the fact that they aren't meeting their touch needs. They are able to focus on and enjoy the positive aspects of their relationships and what their spouse DOES provide for them. I have a client coming up who is happily married, but who struggles with depression and making more connections (non-sexual) outside the relationship is an aspect of healing. I have also seen someone who is married, but who is dealing with past trauma and learning to get comfortable with boundaries again. Everyone has a reason for seeing a therapist, no matter the kind. It is often not the best idea or even healthy, to expect your spouse to be your therapist in healing. Sometimes you need the help of a professional, and you can go back to your spouse with what you have learned and be a better partner with them. It is not cheating to have a professional help you heal so you can be a better partner with your spouse (whereas I might see it a little differently if they had a "cuddle buddy" who is not a professional, who they meet up with occasionally to secretly cuddle). Some people just have to keep our business relationship a secret because this is such a new industry and many people (particularly women) just wouldn't understand. I think about half of my married clients have spouses who support them in this endeavor. While I don't think it's healthy for the relationship to have such secrets, that is not my decision to make.
@stellarosass No, I don’t feel guilty because I am not having sex with them, not kissing them and it’s up to them whether or not they choose to tell their significant other. I tell my cuddlers their personal life is just that, personal and not my business. I am with my cuddlers to cuddle not to judge why they do or don’t share with their wife they cuddle. You will find a lot of men on CC are married but don’t get the affection they need from their spouse so they turn to CC to get their needs met.
@CreativeCuddles - no married men have reached out but i politely let them down easy, i just don’t see myself being able to do it, since i’m not a professional .. but i’m happy you don’t judge them and allow them to feel at ease and get the affection and attention they desire and need!
@ivlegend when I started this I did a lot of research into how a pro ends a session and found basically 2 ways to end it. Some set a timer that will go off at intervals prior to session ending so you know how much time you have. I knew that one wasn’t for me. The other is to just cuddle, enjoy, relax and don’t worry about the time. Most of the time one of the two will say God I wonder what time it is, or just reference the time. I never want my cuddlee to feel rushed or hear a timer go off saying you only have a short amount of time left. The alarm itself would make me anxious, I would then feel rushed and hey it’s 2 pm my time is up, get out my 215 is here. I wouldn’t want to feel that from someone else so I wouldn’t do it to my cuddlee’s. So the pro that did that and didn’t worry about the time? That right there says a lot about how she feels about her cuddlee’s. It’s about you, not her. Whomever it is, thank them.
@CreativeCuddles I just have the one peaceful "alarm" that goes off quietly with 15 minutes left to spare as a warning. I don't count exact minutes, but I do have to respect my time (and the client's as well, since they may have other plans or things to get to as well) by keeping relatively close to the agreed upon session time. Some people might feel pressure to pay extra if we go over the agreed upon time as well, especially if it's a lot, and I don't want to add that to the session dynamic. But everyone operates differently
@ubergigglefritz and I totally respect that. It’s why I read about ending time before I started just to get ideas and having a quiet timer is different than what I read about basically the cuddlee saying the alarm scared the sh*t out of them. Your stating about other plans; that is also a determining factor for those that do have plans after the cuddle. Sometimes it’s unfair to post answers such as mine bc you can’t possibly put all the what if’s into it and again it depends on the plans after, was it during lunch, are kids coming home from school, do you have an appt. that what I mean the way I do it doesn’t fit everyone and when I host I do have to watch time but I start early enough so I am not rushing them out at 215. I didn’t mean my way was the right way, heck I think no matter how long you do this you learn something new all the time. I was just speaking how I am and yes we are indeed all different cuddlers.
Thanks for the clarification
@ubergigglefritz I was just thinking, I am sure when your cuddler arrives you let them know about the timer and I think that as well as the volume makes a huge difference.
I've not met anyone from here to cuddle with, but I'd say if it's an enthusiast, as long as we are comfortable. If it's with a pro, well, there will be obvious time limits.
@BrianL is that because there are none around your area or you haven’t felt you clicked with someone you wanted to cuddle with.
@BrianL - hopefully you can find one for free before having to pay, but ideally do prefer long or short cuddles?
Unfortunately, right now, people are lucky enough if there is a dependable quality professional in their area, let alone someone interested in cuddling for free :-/ When I am no longer needed, that means that our world is a better place. There is no better reason to be out of work
But even once there is more touch accepted in our society, and everyone has access to getting their cuddle needs met, a professional will still be a good choice for people recovering from trauma, for example. Just the same as how most people just talk with friends and family, but some people with mental health difficulties need to talk with a therapist to really get the help and support they need.
@ubergigglefritz thank you for being kind enough to cuddle with all who need it. Married or not.
So much thought put into a session and how to end it nicely and organically. A few months ago I set up a session with a pro and it was from 7pm to 8pm. She got to my hotel room at 7pm on the money. By the time we said hello, did a little bit of small talk, she went to the bathroom and changed, I paid her it was about 7:12pm. We started cuddling, which was just ok, and then exactly at 8pm a loud phone alarm went off and she got up that very second, said good bye and left. All cuddlers are different is very true. Oh, and I paid for the hotel room as well. Safe to say I never called her back.
@cuddleversed - sorry to hear that .. wow
Yes, i agree with @stellarlovee wow.
I’m sorry but that is not a pro. This is just me, but the few minutes to talk to you, get to know you and break the ice are on me. I want you comfortable and I want you to get a feel for who I am and vice versa before we cuddle. It’s an ice breaker for both of us. It sets the tone for the cuddle. I’m sorry you experienced this.
If you ever get to Harrisburg, you contact me and that hour you paid her and didn’t get, it’s on me. I’d be honored to cuddle with you!
@CreativeCuddles Well, it's a bit low on both pros and enthusiasts in my nearby area. But between seasonal work and looking for regular year round work, I've not had much time. If I extended my area I could probably cover the two nearby major cities.
@stellarlovee Ideally? Well, I'm not sure. Long would be nice, but short would be good too since I've not really cuddled in a while.
@BrianL - gotcha, makes perfect sense indeed! You are at a point were you will take either you feel?
@BrianL yes you definitely have to broaden your cuddle area!
@stellarlovee Pretty much, yeah.
@CreativeCuddles Unfortunately, the nearest major cities are both over an hour away, closer to 2 hours plus away with traffic.
@cuddleversed - I hope you posted appropriate Karma to alert other potential customers.
@BrianL Yeah, unfortunately it looks like I'm about 1.5 hours from you =( Might be better than traveling to DC though ;-) Or I could come to you with a travel fee if you are tighter on time.
@ubergigglefritz Yeah. DC is like 2 hours away under the best circumstances. If we were to have a cuddle session, well, right now my time is only limited on weekends, due to work. The other issue would be transportation. I could borrow a car though.
Messaged you. I hope we can work something out
Longest was 4.5 hours!! Shortest was always an hour. I can’t do anything less lol