He broke up with me

Comments

• Carrie_Anne

  May 31

  I hope you don’t regret being fully honest with him, you did the right thing and absolutely necessary if you want to continue as a Pro here. Possibly because concept of platonic cuddling is so new, many people can’t imagine it is non sexual and could feel threatened by the idea of a partner doing it. Or feel worried about their safety.
  Best of luck!
• SpicyNSweet

  May 31

  Wow I'm so sorry to hear that. I think you just need to find the right partner. I'm engaged and my partner is very supportive of me cuddling.
• LadyVel

  June 1

  There are many pros who are in relationships and their partner supports them. My partner has been very supportive of me cuddling.

  I've had several people who know I'm a pro say they would support me in it if we were dating and commend my partner for their support.
• CuddleDuncan Mod

  June 1 edited June 1

  You are well rid of him. It's not that he doesn't trust you: he doesn't even believe you.

  It's common for straight women professional cuddlers to be in committed monogamous relationship. I've met several of the husbands/partners, and they are all very supportive. My experience is hardly unique, as the posts in this thread have already demonstrated, and so the people who answered "Yes" in the poll are incorrect.

  However, it is difficult for some partners for a number of legitimate reasons. They tend to be supportive in principle but can't actually do it practice, and the couple have to work through things in whatever way works for them.

  For new prospective boyfriends, the general advice is just to tell them what your job is when the subject comes up, and if their reaction is persistently negative just move on. Somebody who is unwilling to be supportive is somebody you don't want to be married to.
• jonnyquest

  June 5

  My two cents because in some of the sessions I've had with pros this topic has come up.. If you look at the poll you created asking if this line of work is too intimate for someone in the committed relationship.. You will see 47% of the vote saying yes it is and 42% of the vote saying no it's not it's pretty much a 50/50 issue.. And I'm guessing that's the way it's always going to be. When I've been in a session with Pros and this topic comes up and they asked my opinion. I tell them that for a lot of men it depends whether or not they're ready to be in a serious relationship. If they're not looking for anything serious then it's not really going to matter but if they are serious then it will matter and they will ask are you going to stop. I agree with @CuddleDuncan on the difficulty that a lot of men would have about something like this and truthfully you can put me in that group. Because if I was ever in a situation I already know that even if I genuinely tried in the end I would still say if you want our relationship to work you need to stop this because I'm uncomfortable with it. This is one of those topics where there really is no right or wrong answer.. If this is what you want to do then you owe it to yourself to find someone that supports your decision.
• MsCinderella

  July 2

  I understand it to a degree.
  I'm single, on my dating profile I clearly say that I do this.

  However, I'm very open to stopping for the right person. The way I explain it, I didn't ask you to quit your job why are you asking me to oquit mine? Again, I understand mine is very initiate therefor I'm willing to stop but not after a month of dating. Maybe take a break if that's the compromise to see where it goes.
• Kense

  July 6

  A few weeks? Yeah you don’t know each other and I also would be skeptical if I knew nothing about this place and a woman told me she cuddles people for money after only knowing them for a few weeks, I don’t trust anybody after only a few weeks of knowing them.
• xandriarain

  July 9 edited July 9

  So this has been my full time career for seven years and I’m very public about my work. I have a pretty large online presence as a Cuddle therapist so there really is no hiding it. When I’ve been single, I always put “cuddle therapist” in my dating profile as my occupation. It is annoying getting a gazillion people asking me what cuddle therapy is or if it’s a joke, etc., but it’s much better than wasting time or getting attached to someone who doesn’t accept you. Because this is my business/career it’s a non-negotiable for my partner to accept my line of work. And honestly, I think it’s a good filtering tool because it filters out close minded, conservative, judgmental, jealous types that I would probably wouldn’t want to deal with anyway. I have successfully navigated multiple long term monogamous relationships while doing this work (they ended for unrelated reasons). It’s important to listen to your partner if they are uncomfortable with some aspect of your work and make compromises and also make time for them because obviously this isn’t a standard 9 to 5.
• trysdet

  July 11

  Interesting how yes and no are split right down the middle
• DreamerDee

  July 12

  @trysdet Indeed. I just wonder if I'll take a risk letting the next guy know or just stopping without telling him or what.
• LexieSafeHaven1

  July 20

  This profession is completely different compared to prostitution or or being the side piece as some people like to call it.. professionally, you are helping people that are going through a tough time.Especially within the marriage , if they're looking for someone to cuddle with , then clearly it's hard to tell Your partner that look, I need to cuddle.I need time with you..
  To a man saying that to a woman it's usually the other way around. We're always asking men to be there for us, but in turn, they need to be with someone that needs to be there for them, friend, wise, cuddling, wise everyone should have a equal situation
• sunflowerrae

  July 27

  @DreamerDee I think you’re better off being upfront and honest. Not “confiding” it like a big, shameful secret. But just sharing it, as a positive, important aspect of your life.

  My experience has been that those who share my values, and thus are a good match for me, think it is cool and interesting, and are very supportive. But that’s me - and I agree with @xandriarain - folks who are very traditional are not gonna be a good match for me for a whole variety of reasons.

  I’m sorry that the guy you told was so judgmental. It would be one thing if he had a hard time with it and expressed that respectfully (cool), but instead he was rude and insulting (not cool). It sucks, but better to know that information sooner than later and move on, imo.