I am new to cuddling as a whole, but I came to this site with clear goals that I hope to accomplish through cuddling. As someone who overthinks his plans WAY TOO MUCH I’m trying to get some general ideas so that the “schematics” become a little more clearer in my head. Part of my plan includes public sessions, especially in the beginning.
You see, I have the goal to find a regular cuddler. I usually compare it to my bartender and barber: I do not change them. I’m just a stickler for routine and consistency. Perks of being on the Spectrum. In an effort to find this person I obviously have to “feel” some cuddlers out. Now, since I would most likely have to travel a good distance to find a cuddler I mesh well with it makes sense that in order for a cuddle session to be held in a private space I would need to book a hotel or something similar. (That is the assuming the cuddler doesn’t host.) However, that is an additional cost and investment on my end. So, personally, I would prefer to hold a public session, perhaps a few, to see whether or not I really want to invest that much time and money in doing so for that specific cuddler. (I’ll also add that I do hope to find a cuddler who will be willing to act as a platonic companion to do things with.) To that end, I have some questions so please bear with me.
(1) What are appropriate venues or venues that you prefer? What are some places that you have enjoyed with a client?
I have mentally bookmarked several zoos and aquariums in key areas since everyone likes animals. (Right?) I can picture receiving head scratches while rambling about the difference between albino and leucistic alligators and such. What are your thoughts on places like that? Are there other general places that you might suggest?
(2) What about additional expenses outside of the ones that may be mentioned in your profile?
For instance, say that I book a cuddler for a few hours to go to the aquarium or zoo nearest to them. The ticket I would 100% bear the cost of. But, let’s say, lunch time comes around. Would you expect the client to pay for your meal? Would you be willing to let the client pay for it? I personally have no qualms paying for it. I just wonder whether or not a cuddler would assume I’m trying to turn the session into a date. The same principle would apply if I wanted to give them a small gift from the gift shop. Again, I can see how the act could be misinterpreted, but gift-giving is a large part of my personality. It is one of the primary ways I show appreciation because I am not always the best with my words. For example, if a cuddler told me that they loved Diet Coke, then I would never arrive to a session without one. It would make them happy, and the feeling of making people happy and smile is something I often find myself chasing. In this context, it’s simply my way of saying thank you for them even willing to accept me as a client. (I suffer through a lot of self-doubt, but that’s a whole different conversation.) I do things like that for all my friends and even my co-workers, even those who I don’t get along with. It’s just my way of saying thank you.
I’m probably WAY overthinking this one. I know that it will depend on the cuddler, but a general opinion would be nice.
(3) How is the cuddling aspect affected when in the public eye?
I can appreciate how having a public session would be perfect for platonic companionship. I don’t like doing things on my own, so to have someone go see that one movie I desperately want to watch would be awesome. (I used to do that with my mother, but when I moved out I stopped. It wasn’t possible to take her, and I don’t keeping the experience to myself.) Or to go to an aquarium and ramble about marine life would be such a relief. But we are still cuddlers; I do long for touch. Naturally, when in public, you can only go so far before you attract wandering, misunderstanding eyes. I can see things like hand holding, head pats, and head scratches, but what else can be achieved?
I know this may have been a bit of a long read, but I’ve seen how some of y’all have answered questions in other threads. It honestly impressed me. It’s not like the YouTube or Reddit comment section. It’s professional and respectful, and honestly a bit of a relief to see people online who come across as pretty chill. To all those who comment like that, I appreciate you and I hope things always turn out well for you!
Thanks for reading!