Old photo

VibeSeekerVibeSeeker
in General

So when the photos are the same person but definitely not a current representation of them what are you going to do? It happened to me more than once and I just continue with the booking. Is that considered catfish or not?

In one case they looked the same in all their photos. Im another case even in the photos themselves they were obviously taken months or years apart. She turned out to be a great cuddler anyhow so I wasn't knowing what version to expect anyway.

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Comments

  • SpicyNSweetSpicyNSweet

    I refuse to have a session with someone who I don't even recognize when we meet in person. I will, and have, end the meeting immediately. I always ask for a recent selfie, but 🤷. That's one reason why a public meeting right before the first session is important.

  • SunsetSnugglesSunsetSnuggles

    A cuddlers appearance is the least important thing about them, so I honestly do not care much. I've met people for individual cuddles without even seeing their picture, first.

    It's nice if the pictures are a true representation of what they currently look like, but I don't care if they are new or old.

    Everybody feels differently on this - some people constantly post new selfies like they are a little too in love with their own reflection. Other people post pictures that clearly show a 10-year span of time, with completely different hair colors and lengths, weight fluctuations, etc. etc.

    My profile picture was taken when I joined this site. I've lost a significant amount of weight since then, and then gained most of it back. My approach was basically, if weight or looks are important to a cuddler, they'll either get a nice surprise, or exactly what they signed up for.

    As mentioned in a recent thread, most men who approach me based on my photo alone are walking red flags. I would prefer to be approached for what I write (and thank God, I often am).

    ~ Sunset Snuggles

    🫂 Enthusiast 🏞 Travel Junkie 📷 Shutter Bug

  • GroundingLightGroundingLight

    @VibeSeeker
    Any way you wanna spin it I always feel catfished when the photo doesn’t match real time.
    It’s deceiving to me IMO.
    If you share a photo with me and it’s from 10 years ago or your “college days” and we meet and you are unrecognizable I’m gonna be confused and thrown off…
    And that doesn’t by any means mean I care what someone looks like, I don’t. But I also don’t want to be caught off guard either.
    Like I said, deceiving.
    CatFISHED!

  • mauvefoxmauvefox

    I don't want an old photo, i don't want a blurry photo. this is purely about safety. i need to know what you look like, accurately. I ask for one only after i've made decisions about moving forward with someone, which takes a damn long time for me.

  • VibeSeekerVibeSeeker

    No worries I am me. If I wasn't id be using George Michael or something

  • SpicyNSweetSpicyNSweet

    Exactly, it's about safety

  • CSnMUS87CSnMUS87

    I suppose I need to put in the effort to take some new selfies since it's been about 4 months since my bald selfie. I just never seem to like how they look as I am sure I'm terrible with photo angles in general.

  • SpicyNSweetSpicyNSweet
    edited August 27

    @CSnMUS87 four months I don't consider a significant amount of time. The amount of time I'm talking about has been people with photos about 15 years different and massive physical changes on top of normal aging.

  • VibeSeekerVibeSeeker

    15 years is unacceptable

  • SpicyNSweetSpicyNSweet

    EXACTLY

  • PasquiaPasquia

    I do agree that it is about safety. And being able to be identified.
    If you have old or outdated pictures posted, have the courtesy to send an updated picture when you get to the point of scheduling to meet.
    Most people I have been messaging don't have photos, but send a photo after we've been messaging for a while.
    I'd rather you have no picture on your profile than an outdated ones. I'm going to ask for a photo before we meet if you haven't already sent one.
    It's not about looks, it's about safety and consideration of the person you hope to meet and cuddle with.
    My oldest picture is from three years ago and my most recent picture is from last month. Even with four pictures posted, I still get asked to send a selfie before meeting. My guess is that misrepresentation in photos is so common that people just don't trust any pictures.

  • LadyVelLadyVel

    An old selfie is still better than a stock photo.
    But I would like a recent selfie that represents what someone currently looks like for safety purposes. I don't want to walk into the wrong hotel room, house, or let someone in who isn't who I expected to meet.

  • dan_bluedan_blue

    I don’t care. Most people are self-conscious about their looks and will hang on to a photo that feels right to them. Who cares?

    I’ve been “catfished” here and i literally could not care less if I tried.

  • SpicyNSweetSpicyNSweet

    With all due respect, @dan_blue , it's about safety for me and most women I talk to about this issue. You're simply not at the same risk we are.

  • dan_bluedan_blue
    edited August 25

    I know. You’re right. I don’t care for me.

    If I were a woman, I’d ask for ID.

  • a_cactusa_cactus

    Couldn't you guys just video call to make sure its the same person?

  • SunsetSnugglesSunsetSnuggles

    I actually have a lot of really interesting conversations based on people with a stock photo. They often reflect fascinating aspects of their personality that a selfie never would. 😊

    @a_cactus
    Yes. Many Pro's require that.

    ~ Sunset Snuggles

    🫂 Enthusiast 🏞 Travel Junkie 📷 Shutter Bug

  • VibeSeekerVibeSeeker

    I mean sure I was confused and a bit off put but I drove a long way and I guess i didn't know what the best response may have been and I dont want to embarrass anyone. I think I figured it's only an hour of hanging out and we're not getting married or something so I just let it ride.

    I do now understand reasons why it is an absolute deal breaker for some and that's quite fair.

  • SpicyNSweetSpicyNSweet

    @a_cactus I require a recent picture before accepting a session. The site rules prohibit exchanging contact info before a session is booked, therefore I wouldn't be able to have a video call with someone I hadn't had a session with, until they sent a pic and booked me.

  • a_cactusa_cactus

    Ah, never booked a pro so I forgot that was a thing

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    In all the years on this site and all the pros and enthusiasts I have met and cuddled, I have never had one require a video call. I always send a photo in my introductory message, and most will require a photo for safety, but video chat? Not so much.

    In fact, one time that I offered a video chat they told me they would have to charge. She was a nervous Nellie and I was offering it to assuage her fears. That was a dealbreaker for me when she wanted money for overcoming her own fear.

  • disneysamuraidisneysamurai

    I almost always do an initial video call, usually as a paid virtual session eventually turning it into an in person session.

  • KrishaKrisha

    @TheFunCartel You really think a video call assuages fears? If she was a pro, very normal to charge.

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel
    edited August 26

    @Krisha The context of her fear was how do I know it will actually be the you in the picture that I meet. So yes I really think a video call would calm her fears if she is a normal person. If she can’t live with that then I don’t know what to say other than look for another line of work. And yes I am well aware that many put it on their profile that they charge for video calls and I never take them up on it. So if I offer to prove it is me for their safety, but they want me to pay for proving it then nope, not going to happen. I have had probably 250-300 cuddle sessions so I am well aware what is charged and what isn’t. She was a pro, didn’t have that she charged for video calls in her profile, did not want to meet for coffee, but was too nervous to schedule. She was a noobie and she is still on here after three years.

  • KrishaKrisha

    @TheFunCartel In that context it's very odd yeah, a 1 minute videocall suffices to see how someone looks. Definitely not a job for her if the trust issues are that big.

  • KrishaKrisha

    @TheFunCartel But how would you have had that video call when the policy is that you need to schedule first before exchanging numbers? 🤔

  • TreasureHuntedTreasureHunted

    I don't know if I would consider it "cat fishing", because that implies I was hoping for one thing and received something else. I don't care what they look like. None of us should.

    But! The safety aspect is a valid concern. If something goes wrong, we need a recent picture to submit a report.

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel
    edited August 26

    @Krisha You book, do the video chat, and cancel if the fit is not good. Pretty simple. But the point is I am not going to book someone who wants me to pay to alleviate her fears after providing recent photos. Don’t know why I am being interrogated for a very basic concept.

  • BlueIrisBlueIris Mod

    For me, an old photo that doesn't accurately portray what you look like right now is simply dishonest. If someone misrepresents their appearance, I can't help but wonder what else a person would misrepresent or lie about.

  • VibeSeekerVibeSeeker

    Fair point

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