What changes, if any, have people seen in themselves since they've started cuddling?
I feel alive, joyful and much more confident (some wants to touch me yay!) but also quite bad anxiety that it’s all a dream and will stop...
I am more generous, kind and loving towards all people. My cup is full so I have more to give others. It’s also empowering.
I feel phantom cuddles for days after.
I think I became more open with the way I express affection. Like it sort of 'gave me permission' to do so.
Higher happiness. Lower bank account. And totally worth it.
Through the act of cuddling I've learned more and more the realities of a simple mantra: "in niz bog zarad", a Persian saying I learned from my husband which means "This, too, shall pass". I'm reminded that life is ever-fleeting. All I can do to quell the anxieties of that fact is to slow down, breathe, take in my surroundings as much as I can, and enjoy them while they last and while I have time here. I'm better at being in the moment than I was in years past.
Love this thread, @cabellye, and all the answer so far! Better understanding of self worth and boundaries! Also understanding just how much I really love human contact!
After I cuddle , I feel better about myself, as though something happened and sometimes wish the session could not end.
Hi @Catloaf Thanks for these words, from which I draw some solace. I am currently still in the cruel arms of clinical depression and anxiety (though out of hospital and of suicide watch for some time now).
You would be amazed how many different people independently sent me that mantra ("This Too Shall Pass") - which, incidentally has been attributed to both the Persian Sufi poets and King Solomon.
For me, personally, ironically, it's reference to the fleeting nature of ourselves mostly just triggers my existential anxiety.
However what is hugely inspiring and heartening, for me, in your words is that you, who generously indicate that you have been and perhaps still are on occasion, challenged by anxiety, are able to be a professional cuddler and successfully give comfort and security to others, despite your own human frailties.
Many thanks from my heart Henry
I have a wonderful happy feeling after cuddling
@HappinessHenry and @Catloaf. I just want to say that your posts touched my heart. Many thanks to you both.
Definitely a sense of nirvana and relaxation of mind has been a huge improvement of the psyche for me as well as others ???
I just feel the feeling after being cuddled is wonderful!!!
I feel relaxed and happy. I can express my self better and I can understand others more than before.
Had a session with a professional during the weekend, and what I felt afterwards was confused, wounded, and worse.
This was not the fault of the person I cuddled with, who was very professional, as nice as possible, very welcoming, and present.
It was more of a feeling like...
Imagine having lost your left leg to a terrible and disfiguring accident.
You’ve learned to get around on crutches, even hop from place to place in your home, and life is ok, if clumsy and painful.
And then you find a place where you can rent a magical leg, and it’s amazing. Attaches painlessly, you can walk, dance, run, jump... Amazing.
But you can only afford to rent it for an hour or so a month.
And it isn’t YOUR leg, but simply a well made substitute for what you once had naturally.
And now, the pain, the frustration, the clumsiness, and the guilt of your maiming is brought back to you, exactly as if the maiming had happened yesterday.
That’s pretty close to how I was left feeling.
Again, not remotely the fault of the professional, but those feelings are certainly there.
Like dreaming of a dead loved one, and waking up to the cold mourning.
A little overwrought I think.
I was talking with a friend the other day who is new to the cuddling thing about this. She has felt transformed in such a short amount of time from it. and says she doesn't really understand why some people she has spoken to don't seem to lean one way or another about it. I guess it all has to do with what needs you have that are being fulfilled, and whether cuddling is really an appropriate avenue to have those needs met. For some, perhaps cuddling was thought to be what they needed but it was really something else. And perhaps it is also what the person's expectations are for what they hope to get out of cuddling. I believe in approaching things as a blank canvas and whatever it is, is what it is. Personally I don't experience a major shift or swing, though it is obviously something I enjoy and do miss it if I don't have it. But my day to day life doesn't depend on it.
@CharlesTwisted: Two vivid and very clear analogies. Your post gives me the impression that I understand what you felt perfectly (though of course I don't). I don't object to purple prose in small amounts! Beautiful writing.
Like @pmvines, I haven't noticed any major shifts in mood, personality, or anything else. But I do like cuddling a lot, and miss it when I don't get to see my family for longer than a week—and it does seem to boost my immune system, help a bit with digestion, sound sleep, etc. Not a necessity, but a real nice thing to have!