Non responsive Pros/Non-Pros

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Comments

  • edited August 2019

    I say this. If you are a pro cuddler, I think it is in poor taste to not respond to a potential client at all. It is a reflection of you. I wouldn't want any cuddler who doesn't know how to talk (or not respond) as a so called business person to pay for her services. I had a cuddler once from another site messaged me saying "Want a cuddle". She has no business etiquette as far as give a good introduction or to say what she liked about my profile. Not saying you have to major in business but know how to talk as well as the cuddle positions. OK

  • "You aren't entitled to a response" hurts a little to hear but it's the cold hard truth. Yes it's a little unprofessional to not hear back from a professional on the site after making an inquiry but you can't really compare pro cuddling to most jobs where that level or professionalism would be expected. Most pros do this part time for supplementary income, they aren't going to be aiming to have a career in cuddling and will be spending most of their time focusing on other things.

    The closest thing I can think of would be a commission based artist or short story writer that you might find online.

    As for non professionals again it hurts to not hear back from people but that's just how life is. Not everyone is going to be selfless and considerate of you at all times. People get distracted, people have preferences and people can be overwhelmed. Sometimes it will be rude because they judged you unfairly and then didn't respond, but again that's how life is. In an ideal world everyone would have the time, temperament and inclination to respond to others but we don't live in an ideal world - we live in one where people get exhausted after long days at work and hurt feelings are an expected result of communicating with strangers.

  • edited August 2019

    While there are some good points made already.... from a moderation standpoint here's what I've come across for the reasons Pros and/or women of the site do not respond beyond those who only come to the site once to check things out.... regardless of how minimal, nice, well thought out, or copy/paste the messages are:

    1. They haven't been back to the site in weeks, months, or years. While they may or may not get email notifications from the site saying they have new messages, they don't plan to return yet don't deactivate or delete their account.
    2. Pros and women of the site in particular can get 2-10 pages of messages with each page having 10 messages, within the first hour of signing up on the site without even having a photo uploaded. This will easily overwhelm anyone just joining and while the site does have a system in place to help limit sudden floods of messages a person will get, the thought of trying to go through 20-100 messages to have conversations with each person can deter anyone from doing so.
    3. Going off the previous reason, some simply forget. They open and read the message and forget to respond as something else comes up or they get distracted. Life happens and some people can honestly think they sent a response message, but forgot to hit the Send button.
    4. Some Pros are on this site as their primary and only source of income while many are here to earn a little extra beyond their day job. Career Pros may devote more time to reading and responding to messages, some doing so for a certain amount of time daily or every few days but none sit to read/respond to messages all day. Some Pros will message you if you even visit their profile simply to say hello while others may not depending on how often they use the site.
    5. No matter how well the message is worded, messages which include asking for same-day sessions regularly get ignored unless the Pro happens to see it early, you are already a regular client of theirs, and they already have the available time to have the session.
    6. A big reason messages may not be answered can be having the bare minimum of a profile filled out with no photo and regardless if you're sending a "hi" message or something a little more well thought out. Also, having almost nothing on your profile and sending an obvious copy/paste message or a wall of text of something (also usually a copy/paste) can be skipped in responding.
    7. Another big reason is Pros do have the unfortunate experiences were they do try to politely decline some members they aren't comfortable meeting only to have them get a backlash about it being about their look, age, race, religious beliefs, a disability, etc and receive nasty or even threatening messages because of being turned down. Some who have been turned down have gone as far as stalking off-site. This is also why some Pros go by a false name and use a WhatsApp or Google Voice number to try to keep themselves safe by keeping work and personal lives separate. Overall, some believe it better to not respond than to risk getting hateful messages while others may respond.
    8. Grammar and spelling. If a messages looks more like a toddler rolled their face on the keyboard and hit send, odds are it isn't going to get a response.
    9. Sending a a question to a Pro about something their have listed on their profile which already answers it. Asking things like "do you host?" when it's clearly listed they don't, "what are your rates?" when those are listed as well, or asking for more photos than what they have already uploaded.
    10. Finally, no site member (Pro or not) is required to respond to anyone. If there is an obvious bias against a certain group of people which goes against their contract with Cuddle Comfort, report them and we will look into it and address it.

    Be friendly, be genuine, and get to the point when sending messages to Pros. Also, having more than 3-5 words on your profile and uploading a clear photo or 2 of yourself goes a long way when sending a few sentences in a first message.

  • @reurbo That's a great summary -- I've referenced it in the Cuddling Discussions and Resources.

  • Always think about how others might feel, don't take things personally.

    You can complain all you want about how other people act, but the only thing you can change is how you respond to any given situation.

  • [Deleted User]Jim_To_The_Min (deleted user)

    The fact OP would make this post is, itself, a titanic red flag and a good reason for no one to respond to him

  • @Jim_To_The_Min Red flag in what way?

  • "jim" comes off as a troll, he's constantly wanting to report people for ridiculous things or calls things red flags that aren't.

  • edited August 2019

    I mean, he kind of has a point so maybe he isn't trolling... OP might have some of that entitlement that usually comes with the line of thought that all pros should respond or know what they're doing. Coming into this though, you need to let go of that entitlement in order to have success. It makes more sense to accept that not everybody you deal with knows what they're doing. Just like any other business - if it doesn't fly with you, don't give them your service. If they didn't respond for whatever reason and you feel like you did nothing to warrant that, they've essentially weeded themselves out so why worry so much about it? Because rejection of any form stings like that, especially when someone hasn't learned to practise acceptance.

    @Kense There are a handful of trolls and "forum tarantulas" here nowadays. Sadly it's driven away some awesome voices in this community that I used to love reading not so long ago, and also when I was more of a lurker. Oh, wait. I'm a cat. Cats can give a nice whack to a tarantula (save for some mild irritation to the skin if it fights back), but I dunno about dealing with trolls...

  • I do think it's nice if someone has the capacity to answer every one of their messages, but I don't think it's mandatory by any means. I get that it's a controversial term here (apparently), but I am solidly in camp 'you are not entitled to other people's time'. The push back seems to be that "it's just easy to say no thank you" or something along those lines, but the last time I did that, I was harassed for months before I was able to block contact with this person (as they followed me around to other sites). So no, it isn't always 'that easy' as just saying no. Just as some people deal poorly with being ignored, others deal poorly with being told no. In my experience, those categories overlap more often than not.

  • @ Catloaf, maybe not, however that same person said men who get an erection during cuddling should be banned and reported.

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