I think that the flake in question was, in all actuality, acting in a malicious manner. The deception was planned, is what I'm saying. Doubtless, they're a terrible person, and should be forced into making a public apology to the OP.
Maybe some time in an oubliette would sort out this pernicious cretin...
Sadly I have been flakes on before but I stay encouraged, due to most of my cuddle buddies actually showing up.
Sorry that happened. Unfortunately this is the internet and we can't always predict the outcome I wouldn't waste time being angry or upset over it though . Life is full of these sort of things
Similar thing happened to me on Thursday. I was to meet a female non pro to cuddle. Confirmed the meeting a couple hours before. I drove almost one hour to her. I paid for the room. And she didn't show up. Didn't even bother to message me to cancel. Wated my time, and money.
@DeathbyChocolat , sorry that happened I hope it doesn’t happen again . Good luck with your cuddles
I have yet to see something other than 5-star karma left on a profile. I would think being inappropriate or violating the rules would be a 1-star rating. How many stars would something like this warrant?
i will say, if i was that person who traveled 2 hours by bus, i would feel absolutley disspointed....however theres no way to tell if the ER things true or not. you just gotta roll with it like if you were that person who had an ER emergency and deal. it sucks, and it terrible luck when you traveled 2 hours by bus. But consider the slim chance the ER thing is legit., they are in a much worse spot. and had no choice but to bail and rush to the ER. try to brush it off, and not make it your view for everyone on this site. without defintite info, you just gotta keep an open mind and write it off as shit luck both ways and just try to forget it and keep moving forward and hope better luck is in the future.
That sucks if your a pro should of got a deposit you live and you learn
I’ve been stood up 3 times and it certainly does suck to say the least. Hopefully they will at least get back to you and apologize and reschedule but they also owe you some type of compensation if this truly was the case and not BS
First meeting rule. 1. There must be easy, frequent and timely communication beforehand. I usually get a cell number 2. Don't drive over 30 minutes 3. Don't check in until she arrives unless you have a backup plan for the room
I’ve had a few no-shows from pros, which is certainly annoying. Including from established pros who’ve been cuddling for a while. Don’t understand why people want to sabotage their own business.
@DonLonG I’ve seen almost all 5 star reviews, but a few 1 stars. Nothing in between.
The problem with ratings here, from my perspective, is that (well, presumably except in the case of a no-show), you’ve met the person and likely had some level of intimacy with them. So even if you weren’t thrilled with the experience, you may be reluctant to give them a poor review.
Plus if the other person is a pro, you may not want to negatively affect their income.
Flakes are the lowest of the low.
@DonLonG I need to be better at leaving negative karma, but I find it hard to leave negative karma. I tend to not leave any karma at all and just block the person. I've been ghosted a few times. Am I the only one that handle it this way?
@CaliCuddlingGuy - leave negative karma, it's fair warning for those that follow. The ones I've left negative karma have invariably been banned. I've asked admin to remove their karma/comments from my profile, too, in the past.
I agree with pretty much what @TiffanySue @DarrenWalker has thus far said.
I think if he is genuine he'll understand how this impacted you. So he will work towards helping to make it up to you. "I am sorry" assuming he's said that is really just words, not that powerful to help what you are going through in my opinion. He'd want to give you some form of a compensation. Coming over to you, and go for a drink, I think seems reasonable to me. Unless your transportation was a ton, and his will not be so? I am sure it he takes a first step, you two can figure out. Just give it sometime and see what he says? Not sure who said it, though maybe a report is reasonable. So, if he's found to be doing this to others........ it's reasonable to do something about it?
My thoughts of the situation:
All that said, personally, while I do and will give a tiny bit of the benefit of the doubt here... THIS sounds to me like a bunch of "my dog ate my homework" except, I think the impact is a lot more to you. I've only worked out in school, and don't quite know the rules surrounding that.
However, pretty sure weight lifting without a spotter is a NO go in the first place: even when doing so at home. The likelihood his roommate would do that, AND get hurt right before meeting seems slim to me: as well as irresponsible. Perhaps if this man is responsible, and all, he'll actually have his roommate know moving on that he needs to take his safety seriously, and find other sources of support: should he end up in such situations. I hate to put up with dumb, and rackless decisions, as much as I might care about the person making them. I am pretty sure, if it's a city, he could have called EMS, have them take care of things. While he gets the information of where the roommate would be: So, he could visit later, if desired. Then, proceed to meet you. Letting you know that, he's held up a bit.
There is a tiny possiblity to me that he's infact telling the truth. Though, handled this poorly?
If this is the truth, then I'd say give him a few days. Enjoy your life, and see if he contacts with an apology, and some form of a plan to make it better.
My Advice to You:
@DeathbyChocolat
First a question or two, is this someone you were meeting for the first time? Have you video called first?
Doing so helps to know how genuine, and reliable someone is being. For example, I've my own reasons for doing this. Though, as opposed to being in a chat and just saying "wanna video call now?" I'd plan at least 30 minutes ahead, and ask if they can then. If yes, then proceed to do that. One of the people I've with recently said yes. Then after about 20 minutes asked to reschedule to an hour or something after. I didn't accept that because that was an inconvenience to me, and they've agreed for a time. It also signaled to me a possible lack of commitment(?) though, in the end it all worked out. I explained I just need to for a minute, or two, and that they agreed for said time. If they'd refused, then, I'd likely have ended there. Especially, if this carried on to when we plan to meet. I trust that the individual I am speaking with will stay pretty responsible, and caring: moving forward, however.
I would not travel so far for someone I had never met before. Or I've seldom met. Especially when you aren't a pro that (I think they do) is getting some kind of compensation upfront. I advise you to meet others somewhere midway. Or even more on your side since if things go well, you'd be going over to his. Have a drink, take a walk somewhere public, etc. Get a feel for the person. I am not a fan of going from never meeting before in person, and rolling up to someone's home.
The other advice is:
As much as possible, have a goal besides the person you are meeting. Have other plans in the places you do your first, etc., meeting. Or have a plan nearby it. For example, if at a cafe shop maybe it's an area you haven't been to for so long, and would like to see again. You like their services there, and taking yourself out as well. You've to do shopping near by, etc.
PS.
Formating isn't my strongest area. So, I might convey something I don't mean to: when I am simply trying to emphasize certain points. lol. I am still learning the rules surrounding it.
Guys are used to getting flaked on lol its probably worst if you were on the way or booked a hotel
Just a question... Who hurt you, @Chocolatetreat?
I’m almost positive because of the way it happened I was waiting they said they where on there way to meet me then all of a sudden they “flaked “ I have no proof besides my text which I forwarded to a mod Idc if this person is blocked/ban or not but I left them a rating that was accurate thanks for feedback everyone I was venting you guys are awesome
Why wouldn’t an option be to get a deposit before going ? Maybe Venmo ?
@angelhugs50 Doesn't sound like it was a professional cuddler, so no deposit would apply here.
Yeah totally not about money honesty is key where all human this person could have canceled prior to me arriving and I would have been cool with that
Honestly that angers me so bad. Cause it's happened to me enough times. Where I'll take a 30 dollar uber to someone, they communicate with me, up until the point I arrive, then they ghost me. And I have to take an uber back home. There goes another 30 I'm never getting back. Now I triple confirm if I have to, or if it's far, I ask them to get me an uber. I hate having to be this way, but I'll feel more stupid showing up to a place and wasting my money or time.
as a guy who gets flaked on all the time by cuddlers and non-cuddlers alike... welcome to the club 😂
try not to take it personal. give them the benefit of the doubt for your own peace of mind and assume positive intent. next time i would say dont go to such extents just to cuddle with a stranger. way too much investment for the risk.
Flaking is an early sign of psoriasis and dandruff. Not good.
@Aimi702 wow yeah i can see why you do that 60 bucks is alot
Indeed hurts when you talk with the person and she/he says ( I will be 30 minutes late because I have to finish work report ) and as understanding as one can be , tells the other person ( no problem, you can take an additional 30 minutes so you're not in a rush driving) for her safety , and never hear back from that person ! No text not answering the phone and to top it off you see that the last online here is an hr after last text.
What makes it worst is that the other person is the one who made the initial contact and plan .
PS. Almost forgot to mention, as it turns out she's a " Pro " it goes to show how irresponsible and selfish people can be. After 1 hr travel and $187.00 for an executive suite , to make the other person comfortable and feel appreciated.... completely waste of my time and effort of been punctual and outstanding host .
@DrJames I hope you reported the pro because most pros would not hesitate to report you if you screwed up. It is always a two-way street with an abundance of yield signs.
@DrJames while your consideration is well appreciated,
that's one of the habits that I am trying to break myself from. She failed to be considerate of you, your time, and resources. So to me then you feeling too nice to give her an extra is being too nice. It is her responsibility to not rush red lights, go so fast, and be safe anyway. If she shows up an extra 15 or so minutes late, let her apologize for it as she should. Then, give her the equivalent of "alright". I don't recall where. Though there was something I also hear about not saying "That's okay" when someone is irresponsible, or does us some kind of injustice. I still might have times that I say that, though I think back to how I shouldn't have said so, and that now I am pretty much being a push over to said person.
Most of all, (if you've) I'd not do overly nice and expensive things for someone I never even met before to get an idea of what they are like in terms of responsibility, kindness, and punctuality. It's even better to meet more. Though at least meet once first and find a place with the option to check-in after the person shows up.
@Lovelight I do not think he went overboard or lavish. He got a suite and it sounds like he got a pretty good price for one. I get suites as well when I am traveling. I understand your point if he were buying $1000 bottles of champagne or jewelry, but he was renting a decent room. If I were visiting someone I would appreciate that gesture. Too bad she ghosted him.