Just started last night and am confused to find out there are very few cuddlers in Orange County, CA. Why is that? Please let me know what anyone's thoughts on the matter...
If your not from California maybe broaden the area. Why is cuddling not more popular in big cities? Is it the stigma that cuddling is connected to sex or something else? Let me know because I'm curious to see both sides to the dilemma...
Just remember, you're competing against 15 to 20 guys in your area. Also remember, women in big cities probably get 20 to 30 messages per day. So if she doesn't login everyday, she may have well over a hundred messages to go through. If you message her on day one, she's probably never going to see your message; as a matter of fact it may get deleted without ever being read. It's the nature of the beast for this site. I think men outnumber women on this site something like 8 to 1. So if we want to get noticed you better make damn sure whether our profile is amazing and stands out and when we send the message we better do something to make it stand out.
@jessecaldwell31 Are you referring to the lack of non pro female enthusiasts or cuddlers overall? If it's non pro female enthusiasts then that is a common complaint most everywhere as men really outnumber the non pro ladies by a lot.
Ok. Makes sense. I am new to this whole cuddling thing so was confused to see like 4 female pro cuddlers in all of Orange County. I am curious to see the other side if I became a pro cuddler. Wonder if a guy being vunerable is different.
Similar experience near my city. I assume that like most pairing apps/sites women get a lot more messages and there is less likelihood that they will find this site since their needs may be met in another medium. This site seems less well known anyways to the general public so I wouldn't necessarily say it's due to cuddle stigma. Although who knows if that's a factor
There are big cities still slow to the cuddling community. I am from the South so the only city that is popping of cuddlers to choose from is Atlanta. The other cities like St. Louis, Nashville, Birmingham, Memphis are 5 professionals or less due in part to the stigma as you said on cuddling is sex and it is not true. You have to have actual intercourse for that LOL. I love people on YouTube say professional cuddling myths like men are desperate and creepy to meet cuddlers from these sites. There's women who feared that women won't be safe or they are prostituting themselves for pay. The main reason why it is not a lot more cuddlers is because it is a small but growing community because it is not heard of by many
I love all this insight. I hope this community grows exponentially. I look forward to being apart of something good.
If men want sex and women want money, there are very few places where this is more true than Orange County. This place (Even though it is adjacent to LA) is conservative/neo-liberal politically and culturally. They're not very cuddly just for the sake of it. I woukd be really interested in hearing if you booked a cuddle for pay.
The problem is multifaceted. Cuddling sites are subconsciously linked in many people’s minds to dating sites, sex worker sites, hippie new age sites, Tinder sites etc. partially because people sign up everyday stating in their bios that is what they want. That perpetuates a warped perception of what cuddling is and isn’t.
Women will get inundated with requests and men do not. Some of these requests are not good.
And finally, people are resistant to change. Being first is scary. Members here are pioneers...with my apologies to Willa Cather.
@PeopleLikeUs Why do you say that? I get the Orange County part, but booking a cuddle for pay. I am so interested by all this. I want to try an experiment in my area where I apply as a pro cuddler and see the other side and if men in my area are needed in the cuddling world. I'll report back with the findings.
Yes @jessecaldwell31 - I think you could pull off being a pro. I am curious as to how it would develope. I'm at Whole Foods a lot since I am raw/vegan.
In answer to what I think was a question "...but booking a cuddle for pay." Part of the aforementioned OC state includes a very binary interaction. That is, men and women assume traditional roles. If your experiment is successful you will be swimming against the tide.
A gay friend if mine just interjected that if you are successful at pro cuddling in OC, the bulk of your clientele will be men who are secretly non-binary.
Two points:
Interesting plot twists. I am open to cuddle guys if it is beneficial at showing lonely people they are loved. I just want people to he happy, but in a non-sexual way enjoying the company of nice people.
Welcome, @jessecaldwell31 . Best wishes and happy cuddling.
If you haven't checked out some of the pinned posts, do check some of these out:
Cuddling Discussions and Resources (really, anything by @respectful is well worth your time)
Frequently Asked Questions
And if you're thinking of the pro-route:
Tips/Ideas for New Pros
Thank you for all the great responses. This site is really interesting to say the least. Hope it starts the new chapter in my life.
I think you have a realistic view and open attitude. I'm with you.