Social media offers many opportunities for people from all backgrounds of different creeds and values to meet and interact. There's also an inherent assumption that people are "whole" in terms of having it together mentally and emotionally. That whatever your life journey, your history you have at least made an effort to address and manage your "baggage".
So that when you approach others to interact you bring the supposed lessons of lived life experiences that will keep you thriving as well as offer others an opportunity to share and possibly exchange theirs with you. Presumably as emotionally healthy individuals. Neither demanding anything from or feeding off the other.
Unfortunately, that is not always true. There are many people with wounded souls who haven't addressed their " baggage" from their past. This leaves them in a perpetual state of feeling empty and always "needing" or "wanting" to be filled up. And because they haven't constantly checked in with their wounded selves, they look to others to constantly fill that void. That's unfair to others who are mentally and emotionally available.
So if you're hurting stay away from sites such as this one. Do yourself and others a favour and stay away. Go seek the help you need to heal or do the necessary inner work long term to heal yourself.
Here are some reasons you should:
Your abandonment of self makes you emotionally needy. That drains the energy of others and wastes their time.
You're constantly apologizing for your existence. You appear to lack self confidence and self esteem and hence you irritate and turn off others. They lose respect for you and often treat you like human waste.
You create a repetitive self destructive cycle of having unreasonable expectations of others they either can't or won't fulfill. That's unfair to them and you.
As you feel betrayed or rejected by others refusal and or inability to meet your unmet needs you become distrustful and perhaps even manipulative. You expect the worst of others even when they're being sincere. You use every human pause and phrase as a personal attack on you. You use sarcasm to manipulate a response from them. You even exaggerate your pain to elicit their sympathy which often backfires. And you dig a deeper hole into your self esteem each time.
Hence you interact from a place of fear. Fear of being rehurt. Fear of being re rejected. Fear of being open-minded. Fear of being honest with your thoughts and feelings. Yet you also expect the other to"understand". Even though you articulate none of what you feel , want or need to such person. That creates a cycle of codependence: you either seek to be passive aggressive to control and manipulate by over giving or play the victim who is always misunderstood,and rejected. That emotional mindset sucks the energy and wellness out of others. It confuses and hurts and abuses. That's very unfair to anyone. No one deserves to be the recipient of that. That just creates a very toxic environment for everyone around you.
Eventually you lose your self. You lose perspective and context. You assume connections with others you haven't built. You either try to befriend others too quickly or too slowly. You make assumptions about what they want from and are willing to offer you. Often creating misunderstanding and missed or botched opportunities.
Your mental and possibly physical health declines. As you push others away you further isolate yourself. You steal your own joy as much as you do others. You constantly live in a cesspool of stagnant emotion. Very often you point fingers at everyone and everything they do except yourself.
Hurt people hurt others. Old wounds need time and energy to heal. Give yourself that mental space you deserve and need. Among people who understand and appreciate you. Before you choose to fully engage with strangers where you're just another username.