@respectful Awesome! Can i talk you into updating the above? I'm very curious to compare the population 12 years later!
@littermate "Can i talk you into updating the above?"
It's quite a lot of work to get data about enthusiasts! The system has changed in a way that makes it a bit harder to get all the data (there's a search limit that wasn't there before), and for profiles that aren't publicly visible it means visiting and downloading profiles individually -- which makes some guys quite paranoid and they end up blocking me. :-P
Edit: Oh, I didn't think that through. You don't need to download profiles to get people's ages, since they are displayed in the main search. I'll have a try then -- stand by ...
Woot! I bow to your geekness.
@littermate Here you go ... it's just a sample from people who have been online recently.
The median ages are:
31 -- female enthusiasts 35 -- male enthusiasts 29 -- female professionals 30 -- male professionals
@littermate "I'm very curious to compare the population 12 years later!"
Eek, typo in my other post -- the old graphs were from 2018 not 2008, so that's just 2 years ago.
@littermate thanks for your thorough and poetic response!
No age range for me! Long as you’re allowed to use the site, I’m good with anybody!
I have cuddled twenty plus years difference in both directions and any negative experiences I've had were not age related!
One mitigating factor on age and CC is that even though older people are seriously in the minority overall, they are also in the minority amongst pros. Pros have a lot of competition and age is a factor there as well. So I wonder if there were ever an influx of older people into CC, would that result in a decrease of pros? It might. However, I have never been able to land a cuddle with someone older than me even though that's exactly what I'm looking for. This is the opposite of what I expected to find.
@nurturingman You betcha! @PeopleLikeUs Yah, one wouldn't expect that. @respectful You are awesome, thank you. Numbers, numbers, arf!! What fun. And I prolly wouldn't have asked had the typo not been there so you musta thought, come on demanding lady! Now I'm gonna figure out a way to hold the graphs side by side and observe the differences. It's so interesting, particularly the distribution differences between female and male enthusiasts. I realize there is some gender fluidity in there (can't remember what the gender choices are), but it's probably in the minority and if someone else is hot on knowing about that, I'll leave that request to them.
THANKS!!
I recently met a 68 year old woman. She is a fellow writer in a writing group. She's been isolated and strategic and has worn a mask since March, like I have. Prior to physically meeting and not knowing anything about her, I read the draft of her memoir. I wrote pages of notes and observations and shared them with her via email. She messaged me back, thanked me for comments and suggestions, and insisted that we meet for dinner at her house. I accepted.
She was delightful. When she opened the door, there was this tiny woman with shoulder-length gray hair and warm owl-eyes behind thick glasses and you could tell she was smiling. She had drawn a large smile on her hospital mask. She invited me inside and we had a roast dinner on the patio and got to know each other better. She surprised me with f-bombs and colorful stories. After dinner, we went inside and sat side by side on a kitchen bench and reviewed her draft again. She'd printed out my notes and we matched up various points with her document, then circled back to the ending which she admitted was not completed, but it was close.
This was a very human story, a story of resilience and heart and loss, particularly her husband's suicide over a decade ago. This was not a pain-porn pissing contest of how difficult life was and the unique ways she navigated her path. This was a story of her finding and sharing her voice and heart.
At one point she put her arm around me and rested her head on my shoulder and cried, thanking me for being one of the first to give her ways to improve this already wonderful story. It is an awesome experience to "get" someone by way of their writing and then meet them, to get validation that they are real and true, that they mean something. I know her age because it is prominent in her memoir, but the point is that her age is irrelevant, it's a number, a fact, a stat. I fell in love with this scrappy, funny, kind, 68 year old woman and I am happy I met her.
So I’m a little bit of a n00b here, and didn’t even realize age range was something one could set, but I will be setting it.
I want to cuddle with people with whom I can relate, who have a set of shared experiences with me. I guess that would mean genx or older millennials, seeing as I am 45.
I don’t want to cuddle someone my daughter’s age. First, because that would feel weird to me and the dynamics of good cuddling for me require comfort. But outside of that, I want to have that similar frame of reference. I want to know if a song comes on and I say “I used to play this on my Walkman” and get blank stares. And I want them to be able to relate to me, and have connections that are fulfilling both ways. The age barrier, to me, is one that is hard to hurdle.
Also, as much as I wish it wasn’t this way, many (most?) men here are here hoping for sex. I am not, but imagine young women especially get that pressure from older men here all the dang time, and I just don’t want to be associated with that in any way.
@Sideon Thank you for taking the time to write that sweet and touching experience. I love her too now! @Natickben One of my cuddle partners was really near my age and it was lovely to share so much, from music, to stage of life, etc. Lots of laughs too.
Goddammit @Sideon why you make my eyeballs sweat
Oh my goodness! Your heart and your writing! @Sideon you're such a beautiful soul! 💗 Thank you for sharing something so sweet. The tears that welled-up then splooshed over my ear to ear grin were both warm and comforting. (((HUGS to YOU)))
@Sideon Damn those ninjas cutting onions!
When's your book coming out @Sideon?
Thanks, lovely peeps. @littermate, I hope to finish by spring.
@Sideon put me on the announcement list!
I lost my grandparents this time last year and thinking of how frail they were made me a little afraid of hurting them. I know that not all 70+ year olds will be that frail but it is in my head and is part of why I have a limit.
Awwww.
My favorite cuddled (F) is 30 years younger than I (M).