Moderator Thoughts on Mental Health

SideonSideon
edited January 2022 in General

Even before COVID, people have been coming to this site for connection. For many, there was and is still dreadful, extended isolation, and loneliness. CC provides a platonic refuge, an opportunity to connect with others. Not to say that this forum and space is a free-for-all and anything-goes, as there are proverbial "guard rails" in place by way of the TOS and forum rules.

People on CC are kind and it's one of the reasons I've stuck around. Time and again, enthusiasts and pros reach out to new people coming on site and help them navigate:

  • yes, this site is real;
  • read the rules, dude (and dudettes);
  • there are General, Requests, and Pro forums;
  • lay off the personal attacks, as they will never end well for the instigator(s);
  • making friends and connections takes time and effort;
  • and one why-doesn't-anyone-respond-to-me answer is "fill out your profile!".

Over the last several years, there have been a handful of instances of individuals threatening suicide. It is heart-wrenching and stressful, balancing privacy, mental health advocacy, and community safety. CC is in no way equipped to handle these kinds of "calls for help" to those threatening suicide or self harm. We do not have the means or resources to provide tele-health. We are not counselors nor psychologists. Behind the public forum posts, we try to contact the individual and see if we can provide links or phone numbers for their local mental health resources, if they are available. In each of these instances except one, the users chose to delete; the one exception I'm aware of was banned for an unrelated incident.

I ask that we collectively continue to practice kindness to those coming into this space. We do not know the struggles and challenges others face, but we as humans can empathize and try to acknowledge their journeys. If we cannot directly help, may we at least not create additional harm.

RESOURCES

May is Mental Health Awareness month
September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month
October 3-9 is Mental Illness Awareness Week

IN THE U.S.

Nat'l Suicide Prevention Lifeline Hotline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255))

IN THE U.K.

Supportline. Hotline: 01708 765200
National Suicide Prevention Helpline
Samaritans
 and can also call free 24/7: 116 123

Any Accident & Emergency department (A&E)
Or dial 999

IN CANADA

Call 833-456-4566 https://www.crisisservicescanada.ca/en/

Text 686868 https://www.crisistextline.ca/

If you have links or numbers or resources not listed above, please feel free to add to this thread.

Edited for formatting

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Comments

  • CuddlesByGracieCuddlesByGracie
    edited October 2021

    Great post @Sideon ❤️

    Mind has a great list of UK services for anyone experiencing a mental health crisis or supporting someone who is, including the National Suicide Prevention Helpline

    https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/guides-to-support-and-services/crisis-services/helplines-listening-services/

    Thank you, @GracieGirl - I'll copy your link to the UK section above. [-Sid]

  • calmcontactcalmcontact

    Thank you for this.

  • Mela_BMela_B

    I like this kind of post. 💜

  • me2me2

    Well said :)

  • Cessna_guyCessna_guy

    <3

  • Ahmedali999Ahmedali999
    edited October 2021

    To tackle
    Call local hospital,GP 999,church,mosque, temple⛪🕌🛕ect
    Speak to someone you trust friend/family 🗣👤👨‍👩‍👦 ☝️ if you don't have ask Google,qura or ask God for help he will Guide you.
    Think positively, if you feeling down mix with people,go shopping centre, park ect
    Eat healthy,be active,take shower,do some,cleaning,cooking .
    Seek help and advice always best solution because human needs other human,help,opinion,support.

    So, surely with hardship comes ease.
    Surely with ˹that˺ hardship comes ˹more˺ ease.

  • NicoSnuggsNicoSnuggs

    Thank you @Sideon for posting this. ✊🏽🙏🏽

  • Sheena123Sheena123
    edited October 2021

    This should be stickied 🌸🌸

    Done. Thanks, @Sheena123 . [-Sid]

  • calmcontactcalmcontact

    @Sheena123 Agreed

  • ILikeWarmHugsILikeWarmHugs

    I love this so much!!

  • sean2589sean2589

    As someone who has struggled with depression for several years and some suicidal thoughts over that stretch, I really appreciate this post. And just in general, I'm thankful for the community that I see on here.

  • SoftHairForDaysSoftHairForDays

    Great post! I always try to be kind and helpful in my replies/in my interactions with others. 🤗🤗🤗

  • SweetMeLLSweetMeLL

    Real & informative! Love it!!🥰

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan
    edited January 2022

    Thank you @Sideon. In the UK:

    Samaritans
    www.samaritans.com
    Call free 24/7 ...... 116 123

    Any Accident & Emergency department (A&E)
    Or dial 999

    Done. Added. Thanks, @CuddleDuncan

  • Ahmedali999Ahmedali999
    edited October 2021

    @DimpleGirl kindness,mercy is best way .

  • happybearhappybear

    If your struggling, There is help out there, no one should feel alone, there is mental health services, support groups, and local resources. Reach out to NAMI or DBSA for local support. This community gives you a place to take a breathe and feel, hugs to anyone struggling..
    Thank you @Sideon for posting it.

  • quixotic_lifequixotic_life

  • Ahmedali999Ahmedali999
    edited October 2021

    @Ahmedali999 - no. We aren't quoting religious texts from any faith here. [-Sid]
    I though religious texts help but is fine 🤗

  • GaryGary

    Very eloquently said Sid. If anyone is reading this feeling down or suicidal - let me tell you better times are ahead. There's always something to look forward to, no matter how big or small. Take each day as it comes and you can find happiness in the littlest of things. Reach out to someone. Build strong connections and bonds.

  • THBearTHBear

    @quixotic_life thank your post. I know for some it feels more comfortable texting and less daunting than making a call

  • MorpheusMorpheus

    I was struggling a bit this year, it wasn’t horrible but I was definitely having some issues. I decided to see a therapist. I’m 8 sessions in and it’s worked wonders. I think especially as men, we grow up taught to be strong and not admit weakness. We hold our emotions in and all of these bottles up emotions do us no good. I encourage anyone that’s having issues, don’t be afraid to reach out for help.

  • [Deleted User]sameyeam (deleted user)
    edited October 2021

    @Sideon is everyone here truly kind? No one here gets bullied or shunned?

    @Morpheus being a man is hard, people expect way too much from us, and its especially hard to have no siblings, and no family, women seem to have an easier time finding friendship and romance than men do, especially men who have social phobias from childhood bullying.

    No, @sameyeam - not everyone is kind. Hence the encouragement and post. The site is diverse. Conflicts will happen, as in any gathering of different perspectives, opinions, intentions, experiences, backgrounds, etc. We (mods) don't advocate bullies and shunning, except for anyone on here with non-platonic intentions - they get shown the door quickly. Enthusiasts and Pros make efficient and effective use of flagging problem posts and profiles. [-Sid]

  • OhioMikeOhioMike

    @sameyeam i can’t speak for @Sideon (one of the kindest people on forums here) but plenty of people get bullied here regularly. It’s one of my pet peeves! 😖

    On being a man is hard ? Idk? 🤔. It’s only person I’ve been. I’ve always thought a lot of wonderful people have it harder than me in life. Just my thoughts

  • SoftHairForDaysSoftHairForDays

    @sameyeam - Sid did say "lay off the personal attacks, as they will never end well for the instigator(s)" so there are issues at times with people being unkind.

    "being a man is hard, people expect way too much from us"
    Perhaps the people who expect too much from you are the people that you don't need in your life. I've had to cut people out of my life if they had unreasonable expectations of me. You've gotta take care of you first. I honestly don't feel like all people expect way too much of men.

  • [Deleted User]sameyeam (deleted user)

    @OhioMike Thats a shame about the bullying, I hate bullying and ostracism, had to deal with that for my entire childhood. Being a man is hard for certain people I guess, for me it sucks because I have social issues and always had a hard time making new friends since childhood. I was raised very isolated as a child and my parents didn't exactly pay me much attention.

    @DimpleGirl the very people who "raised" me were the ones to make me feel that way, and every single person I ever met or had as a "friend". For the longest time I just wanted to be a girl because I figured girls have an easier time to make friends. I even did a social experiment by making a female profile on myspace when I was 16, but kept my personality. People were so nice to me as a "girl" while as myself I was met with cold indifference. Even on here I'm starting to notice people here don't seem to like me since I've gotten many profile visits but no responses. I used to think I was super ugly as a teenager, ubt I stopped feeling ugly in my 20's but sometimes I wonder if maybe I am actually ugly or just cursed?

  • OhioMikeOhioMike

    @sameyeam looking at your pro profile…you come across as pretty confident person, pretty sure of themselves. Wish you all the best here. As far as bullying here it comes with territory unfortunately especially pros have it rougher I think 🤔

  • BabichevBabichev

    Being a man is hard.
    Being a woman is hard.
    Being a child is hard.
    Being an adult is hard.
    Being an older person is hard.
    Being a younger person is hard.
    Being a human is hard.

    Life is difficult.

  • nurturingmannurturingman

    Interesting that I’ve seen a few of these just today. I feel uncomfortable trying to help a stranger in a public forum when it comes to mental health. I think from now on if I respond at all it will be to link to this post!

  • BabichevBabichev

    I’d like to share a few resources.

    This is a brief interview with Dr. Sapolsky on depression. It touches on some highlights, such as that it’s a disorder of brain chemistry, not a character flaw, and is potentially fatal.

    This is a much longer lecture on depression. It goes into a lot of detail which some may enjoy while for others it might be too much. For me, this lecture was a game changer in that it really drove home that depression is a biological disorder.

    This is an hour long documentary on the physiological effects of stress. Very interesting. Notice how often it depicts primates grooming each other. We human primates are biologically wired to respond to touch and contact with others of our species.

    Stress: Portrait of a Killer.

  • LifeasdanceLifeasdance

    Well said and lots of love to all of you kind and generous people, and to anyone who is struggling

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