So... baseball cards only. The boys and men in your childhood only valued and took pride in baseball cards. Weird, but okay. Boyhoods different from mine were what I was looking for.- No, we had many hobbies. Swimming, reading, trivia, etc.
So a kid punches you in the face, knocks you down, starts kicking you—but you say things to him as he's beating you up, and that convinces him that you're not weak, so he moves on to hitting someone else.- Yep, once you stand up to a bully, then most likely they will stop bothering you.
Lucky. Man, I would've given a great deal to have been able to get my grubby little fingers on as much as a quarter a week, most years. It's tough getting money for lawn-mowing and leaf-raking when most people do it themselves.- I had a job and worked. It had nothing to do with luck.
And millions of people. It only takes one in every hundred or so to do a lot of damage. Are those relatively few violent criminals normal? Is it really standard for people to believe that it's okay to assault men over the most trivial of reasons? Do most people really think that?- Obviously I don't think it's ok for anybody to assauly any person.
@FunCartel
Sorry, misread your post.
I have been staying away from this thread. And I’ve skipped reading it. But @DaringSprinter, I think you might find a better accounting of the perspective you’re looking for elsewhere. Perhaps “Never Too Much” an essay by Marc Lamont Hill.
Here’s a piece of it.
@tucsonaz This first bit is baffling me.
We seem to be talking past each other. "What items did the boys and men around you take pride in?" I ask, and you tell me the boys collected baseball cards.
"The men too? And is that the only item any of them, boys or men, took pride in?" You respond that you all collected baseball cards, boys and men both.
"Fascinating," I say, fascinated. "Imagine only valuing and taking pride in baseball cards. Amazing. Thank you."
And you tell me no, the boys around you also went swimming, read, and played trivia games.
Holy non sequitur, Batman.
So a kid punches you in the face, knocks you down, starts kicking you—but you say things to him as he's beating you up, and that convinces him that you're not weak, so he moves on to hitting someone else. Yep, once you stand up to a bully, then most likely they will stop bothering you.
So a kid punches you in the face, knocks you down, starts kicking you—but you say things to him as he's beating you up, and that convinces him that you're not weak, so he moves on to hitting someone else.
Yep, once you stand up to a bully, then most likely they will stop bothering you.
What on earth did you say to him?
I had a job and worked. It had nothing to do with luck.
My ten year old self working two freelance jobs with hardly anyone hiring, and those hiring paying virtually nothing begs to differ.
I mean, it's not like I chose the neighborhood.
Face it: your ten year old employed self making enough money to afford whatever you wanted—he was luckier than ten year old me.
Obviously I don't think it's ok for anybody to assault any person.
Ah. Well, then. If you think it's obvious that you, a random stranger on the internet, don't think it's okay to randomly assault men... you must not be one of the people who have received (and I quote) "a lifetime's worth of patriarchal conditioning that it's okay to assault men over the most trivial of reasons."
@MonkeyNeedsAHug, it would seem that you are very right. Yes, that looks a lot more like what I'm interested in learning about. Thank you. I'll check it out.
@DaringSprinter
You asked what we collected. I just gave one example. I also stated some of our hobbies. I didn't know you wanted my life story. haha
What on earth did you say to him?- I used a lot of expletives.
My ten year old self working two freelance jobs with hardly anyone hiring, and those hiring paying virtually nothing begs to differ. I mean, it's not like I chose the neighborhood. Face it: your ten year old employed self making enough money to afford whatever you wanted—he was luckier than ten year old me.- I didn't just work in my neighborhood. I wasn't employed, I just did odd jobs to make a little money. I never said I could afford whatever I wanted. It's not "luck" that I chose to make money at a young age.
My guess is 99% of people don't think it's ok to assault others for trivial reasons.
@tucsonaz
That's my guess as well.
I don't think you're who I'm interested in after all. I'll wait for the people who have been conditioned to believe that it's okay to assault men over the most trivial of reasons. And perhaps look for a book.
@MonkeyNeedsAHug? What's the name of the book that essay is in? I'm having trouble finding it.
You Are Your Best Thing Vulnerability, Shame Resilience, and the Black Experience
An anthology edited by Tarana Burke and Brené Brown
@DaringSprinter, to be clear, the author doesn’t actually say he was raised to believe it’s ok to assault people for no reason.
I think his position is that masculinity doesn’t need to be that toxic in order to be poison. Enjoy!
hmmm ok then? Not sure what the point was with all those other questions and you thinking I was "lucky" that I made a few dollars as a kid by working. Kind of seems strange now. lol
I'll wait for the people who have been conditioned to believe that it's okay to assault men over the most trivial of reasons. And perhaps look for a book.- I doubt anybody on here is going to say that anybody should be assaulted for trivial reasons. I also doubt you will find it in any book.
@MonkeyNeedsAHug: Well, it's closer, anyway. Thank you.
@tucsonaz: Someone already said he'd received a lifetime's worth of patriarchal conditioning that it's okay to assault men over the most trivial of reasons. Follow the link. It's that kind of childhood I'm interested in, and that kind of childhood I've been asking about.
You should start a new thread asking your specific question.
I'm still confused why you asked me all the questions?
I didn't see anybody say on that post that it's ok to assault anybody for trivial reasons.
Thanks for wasting my time. lol
In another thread, I was introduced to a boyhood very different from my own; a boyhood which conditions people to believe that it's okay to randomly assault men; a boyhood that leads a man to expect random nonsexual violence even from cuddlers.
@tucsonaz, when you presented yourself as a man who believes that men are often assaulted for no reason, yes, I became interested in the way you were raised.
I see now that you are not what I was looking for. I've wasted your time and my own.
I'm very sorry for it.
Nowhere in that post does the poster say it's ok to assault anybody for trivial reasons.
If you watch the news or read a newspaper, then you wold know men and women are assaulted every day for trivial reasons. Obviously the vast majority of people know that it's not ok to do that.
I'm not sure why you asking about what I got for Christmas and you calling me "lucky" because I made a few dollars as a kid have to do with anything.
Just extremely strange.
Well Daring Sprinter, I wish you were better timing sprinter...spent my whole life wondering where mine was. That angry musclebound sombitch must've hightailed it out of here damn near half a century ago chin and all
What he didn't know was he left all the amazing parts right here in this ol skinny Sombitch😏