Time and Energy

I'm fairly new to this- only because I haven’t had a lot of sessions so far. But In my experience here so far a lot more of my time and energy has been used in a negative sense then positive-which is not the way I intended. My profile is clearly written stating what my preferences are, but I’ve been blocked by members because of things that are clearly stated I don’t offer. It’s frustrating and I was wondering is anyone else going/have gone through this ???

warm_embrace

I just looked at your profile and I don’t see anything that would lead someone to block you. Are you being blocked after you’ve communicated with potential cuddlers? Is it something you’re saying in that communication. What are you saying? Honestly, I don’t see why that would be happening based on what you say in your profile.

CuddleDuncan

We've had threads about blocking. The summary is that there are eleventeen million more reasons that people might block you than you can imagine, and none of them have anything to do with you.

Many potential clients do not bother to read profiles before messaging a professional, because the chance of a reply is less than 50-50. Having established that you don't do what they want, they block you so that there is no risk of accidentally messaging you again in the future. They are using blocking as an administrative tool.

TNNative

@chanel0986 I can relate. When I created my CC profile I think I was naive (not saying your are though) about the process and how complicated choosing a cuddle partner would be. I was overwhelmed with messages, so I muted my profile (which still allows me to communicate on the forum and with those who sent me messages before muting) so I could better control the volume of messages. Then there was the content of the messages and those who eventually communicated they wanted more than something platonic. Weeding out the negative for the positive I was searching for had been tedious, but I persevere. The benefit for me has been allowing me to think about and get better in touch with myself and clarifying my boundaries so I can move forward with confidence. Good luck with your process.

@warm_embrace… Hi so I’ve been blocked after communicating with the person.I was asked do I host? I told them politely that I do not host… I was blocked by the individual for that. Honestly that’s often seems to be the hang up here.

@TNNative … Thank You for that! That has also been a part of the process that I have appreciated. This has helped with establishing clear and strong boundaries. I believe that is what I have been doing - sometimes I’m left with the thought is there something that I’m not realizing is being communicated? Or is there a lack of what needs to be communicated. But thank you for your feedback and well wishes. Good luck to you as well!

xandriarain

Sadly, many people don't read profiles, and it feels like an unnecessary slap in the face when someone blocks you when you have been nothing but kind to them. You might want to add more details to your profile, like what days and times you are available, how to book a session, etc. Your rates may be too low; some clients may see that as a red flag. Maybe you could offer to host at a hotel or Airbnb for an extra fee or offer a discount or free bonus hour if someone has to book a hotel for the session. If you get enough clients in hotels, you can eventually rent an office space to host in and raise your rates even more. It could also be your location; I doubt there is a large cuddling market in Buffalo, NY. Most people who get enough clients to do this full work time live in major metropolitan areas like NYC, Philly, DC, Boston, Chicago, LA, etc.

@xandriarain .. Thank You ! I’ll try out those suggestions.. and you’re right it’s not a big market area and really it’s been a lot of cat and mouse situations then ones that have proven to actually work out. But those are really good ideas to try.

@Chanel0986 if you were blocked because they asked if you hosted and you said you do not host, they're simply blocking you so that they don't come across your profile again as a potential match because you're not a fit for them. It's really nothing personal.

ShaneSchrute

@Moxytocin good point!

I mean ideally it would be good to be able to have something like a mute feature like on Twitter; so for example someone who only wants to be a guest doesn’t see cuddling cuddlers who don’t host. This would help the pros and lazy clients who refuse to read profiles.

WestsideMarc

This is a VERY VERY hit and miss process! People can be strange, unpredictable, flakey, but can also be wonderful too. Try not to take it personal. (I myself am astounded with the incredibly low response rate I have experienced on this site. I literally have to message AT LEAST 20 - 25 women even to get just one single return message. And that’s after writing what I believe (and am told) is one of the best written profiles here, not to mention SIX great karma reviews from women that have cuddled with me in the past, but it can definitely be a frustrating and exhausting experience.) Keep hopes high but expectations low. That’s my take…

GreatHornedOwl

@Chanel0986 Some men will block you because there is something about you that they don't like. Far more men will block you because they have determined that you would be a good match for cuddling, and they don't want to be bothered by having to repeatedly look at your profile.

Here are just a few reasons that might apply for me not want to see some hypothetical woman's profile:
1. Neither of us can host.
2. I'm outside of her stated age range.
3. She's only available evenings or nights, while I'm only available afternoons.
4. She's only available weekends,while I'm only available weekdays.
5. I'm married, and she doesn't cuddle married men.
6. She has a severe pet allergy, and even my vehicle is full of cat fur.

These are some of the reasons that I would block a woman if I were into blocking. Actually, I don't block any of them. Those men who do, might consider that some people have a very tender psyche, and can become upset by being blocked. Personally I believe that it is better for me to waste a few minutes viewing profiles that have no chance of a match, than risk damaging a woman with a tender psyche.

warm_embrace

I am sorry if this is a stupid question, but how does one even know if they’ve been blocked?

DaringSprinter

@warm_embrace: If you go to view someone's profile and instead of seeing their profile you see a message saying they've blocked you....

(That's the only way of figuring it out I know of.)

Edit: Oh, wait! This one time I was looking at my Visitors page, and a name vanished from the list between the two times I checked. Every other name the same—just that one gone. So there's that, too.

tinc

@WestsideMarc holy moly your written profile is pretty amazing! 😊👌

WestsideMarc

Aww thanks Tinc, super nice of you to say.

I guess it’ll help if I clarified this … I’m not taking anything personal I understand the blocking so you don’t come across the profile again even. I’m speaking more so if we take the time to write a profile.. why not read it and see if I don’t fit their qualifications ? Instead they’ll message and even suggest / book a session just to end up being blocked. It’s a waste of time - even more so because messages go to an email- not the ease of an app.

@GreatHornedOwl
I’m not offended in the least … I just find the process to be a waste of my time … especially when there’s a profile written that can be read before you take the extra steps to even send a message. But thank you for your response!