Pro Cuddlers Refusal to Communicate

BeaujoFire

Hello to the group. I am just throwing out a few thoughts. I have been on the site for around 1.5 to 2 years now. I have been a part of approx 8 to 10 cuddles, and all of them, at least in my opinion, have been great except for 2. That has nothing to do with my comments. I was just giving background.

I enjoy the cuddling service, but I disdain the fact that so many of the pros, at least here in my area, lack communication. I have messaged many pro cuddlers in my area, and many never respond. I have seen other forum threads commenting on this subject with all kinds of excuses—comments such as they are so busy and might be overwhelmed, etc. My comment is this: as a pro, collecting money for your time and service, you are running a small business. Whether it is your primary source of income or just a side business. It's still a business.

If someone takes the time to write to you, introduce themselves, etc, and you skip over and ignore their message. Then, take a quick minute and reply. Even if your reply only says, "I'm busy" or "not interested." At least the person who messaged you knows you looked at their message. Come on, it's respectful customer service. Take a minute and reply. As a business owner, I acknowledge every customer's message, test, phone call, or email. That is unprofessional, just as many women here (at least in my area) are.

Ironman294

It’s overwhelming the amount of messages they get. So some messages get skipped. Or they are not interested in cuddling with you. It happens, what are you gonna do. They don’t have to reply or required to. That’s basically it. None of us are owed a reply.

Cadawin

@Ironman294 I appreciate your response. We are not online every day, many of us have a day or multiple jobs already in addition to other daily responsibilities. We appreciate the understanding and patience of potential clients. It's refreshing to know that someone out there gets it. No one is owed anything. I have missed messages, as have my responses to potential cuddlees. It happens, but no one owes anything to anyone. This is a service we chose to participate in, it's not a conventional type of business, like a doctor's office. We as pros are responsible for running our service, all the ins and outs. I have been a pro little over a year now, some of the requests made are outlandish at best, and many are banned before having to see sometimes vulgar messages.

@BeaujoFire There are quite a range of pros here. There are those who take seriously the vocation of cuddler. They have training and they offer empathy, kindness, and attention to detail. These are the business people you refer to, and they do exist. But there are also those who just want easy money by allowing themselves to tolerate a guy for a while. I suggest to you that if someone doesn't respond, you are better off just writing them off. I wish you the best.

TheFunCartel

I disdain the fact that so many of the pros, at least here in my area, lack communication.

They might be deaf and they can’t sign over the internet.

CuddleDuncan

@BeaujoFire globally, the response rate from professionals is less than 50%. Expecting better is gonna end in disappointment.

When I was new to CC my experience was very similar to yours. (The reply rate was about 1/3.) So I know how much it sucks, and I went through a phase of writing to two at the same time in the hope of obtaining one reply.

However, the response rate of professionals to messages from me now is very high, not 100% but not far off it. This isn't magic or luck - it's mostly selectivity.

You may find these threads helpful:

• How To Choose Your Professional Cuddler

• The Perfect Opening Message (to a professional)

TheGypsyCuddler

@BeaujoFire and @Cadawin Agreed- everyone is on here for different reasons. And everyone has different responsibilities and a different amount of time they can put into being on the site and responding to messages. Some are more part time and only cuddle with certain people and don’t engage those who aren’t respectful.

So it is more of a nurturing type interaction than an instant chat response type customer service. However I do strive to balance the art of follow up and respond to all of those who message me with interest for a cuddle. And if I happen to miss a message, I’m always okay with someone following up with me again to make sure.

TheFunCartel

@BeaujoFire You ever cancel on any of them?

RadiantHugs

@BeaujoFire you might already be doing this, but one thing which helps greatly in getting a response from pros is to include a bio picture right from the get go with your very first message. Since you don’t have a profile pic, doing that really helps your request stand out from spam.

I, too, have encountered pros who simply don’t respond to requests - but I actually consider this a great boon, as pros basically have done my work for me by selecting themselves out. Trust me, it’s not too much fun to have a session with a pro who just isn’t on top of this.

Minestrone101

Maybe check their online activity. Maybe they hadn't logged in for a while. maybe their roster is full. Just move onto the next pro if it doesn't work out.

cuddlefaery

As a business owner, I acknowledge every customer's message, test, phone call, or email. That is unprofessional, just as many women here (at least in my area) are.

As a business owner, you should know that what works for one business or industry doesn't necessarily work for another. If you had a disagreement with a customer and they posted a review like this, you most likely would feel the need to give "excuses" as well, explaining why you run your business the way you do and your side of the story. Unfortunately we cannot get the pros side of the story to get a fuller understanding.

As someone who worked in customer service for almost 20 years before I started cuddling, I can assure you - "the customer is always right" policies end up hurting quality of service given to ALL customers and ensures low employee morale and retention. It is inevitably the customers who insist on this outdated mindset who are not only in the wrong, but who are notorious abusers of the system and service workers in general. Sometimes the customer IS wrong, and sometimes the best customer service happens when service is denied to some - but no one ever wants to admit they might be that person.

If you read the other threads and saw your point had already been made, and yet STILL felt the need to start a new thread on the topic, all you are showing us is that you feel entitled not only to pro's time but also to our special attention. Perhaps it might be more helpful for you to inspect why you are needing validation now, after all this time and despite the other threads.

Lovelight

They are in a lot of ways quite informal about it. They don't have at least I don't know of any who are doing so well that they maybe hired receptionists to handle that for them either.

As much as you might not like to hear it, they've a life outside of this and when they are here most of them are doing their best to respond. If they are getting more messages then they can handle or respond to within a given time that's not their fault. They can only do so much. Plus they aren't obligated to respond to everyone and don't have to. I'm sure it can be frustrating, though that's life.

The OP deactivated his account by the way.

Faceless profiles are always the ones complaining the loudest about no response. You have no skin in the game! I can’t even do a vibe check on the light in your eyes because your privacy is so important to you. That’s fine. But you can’t be shocked pikachu when people decide to skip over a faceless profile that could be ANYONE.

Put up a pic and see your responses increase.

sunnysideup

@RadiantHugs i agree with this, by not responding and/or having poor communication speed, they’ve lost my business and I find someone else I can hand my hard earned cash to. It's a sign that they may be a bad cuddler and I'm happy they've filtered themselves out to let me deal with someone who is good. I've had only great cuddle sessions so it's working out well for me

@SmokyQuartz Agree with this, my profile is faceless though I send pictures of myself to anyone I'm intending on cuddling with, though I'm not sure if you're already doing this. Though, even if you're doing all the right things, your response rate probably won't exceed about 50% as @CuddleDuncan pointed out.

@Lovelight well if he deactivated, I guess there's not much point in my response, but I guess I'll leave my post up for other members who may be wondering about the same thing as the OP

Baby_

id say yeah only about 2 out of every 5 cuddlers i reach out to respond and those that dont respond months after have no karma its like come on if you dont want to cuddle delete your profile

TheFunCartel

The OP deactivated his account by the way.

If he deactivated he can come back at any second and read and comment on the posts. I deactivate when I am busy. Deleting your account is the permanent move.

Mike403

@BoomerSpooner - Permanent after the 30-day period it gives you to change your mind.

Minestrone101

@Baby_ Pro cuddlers have right to respond or not to respond just like enthusiasts have a right to choose who they write to and cuddle with.

As @SmokyQuartz stated, a picture and even a more complete profile will increase your response rate.

Sooson

@Minestrone101 We don't know for a fact that a picture and a more complete profile will increase the response rate....the impact may be negative. Just being realistic as usual.

Age is also a factor let's be honest. I believe OP was 60. Not sure whats the age range he was interested in and reaching out to.

Minestrone101

@Sooson Well, almost woman cuddler has voiced that is the case. If you disagree with them, that is something that youd have to confirm with them about.

Of course age does play a part whether people like to admit it or not. Many people are most comfortable cuddling with people in or around their age range. I do wonder if OP reach out to cuddlers between 45-65 as well. Of course age shouldn't matter unless someone is totally not interested in cuddling with some that is the same age as their daughter or niece or father or grandfather. Everyone has their preferences, but hard to tell from a non-answer.

Sooson

@Minestrone101 well you don't realy expect a pro that agrees with me to be vocal about it do you ? Just as people don't like to admit age doesn't play a part , they also may not like to admit other factors play a part.
And that's OK. The free market at work.

I dont take it personally if a pro doeent respond to me. I also don't respond to every pro that reaches out.

Minestrone101

@Sooson I feel that we shall take people at their word and not selectively decide what to believe and what not to believe. That should be the case just as you wouldn't want someone to take words out of your mouth and explain back to you what you really meant and what you really didn't mean based on their own interpretation.

All I know is that I'm happily cuddling with pros and enthusiasts, and I followed most of @CuddleDuncan and women cuddlers tips on how to inquire, how to cuddle, and keep good boundaries and protocol to keep cuddlers feeling safe. So, I can say from personal experience that what they say is true.

Sooson

@Minestrone101 well I hope you don't use that approach when you shop for a car

Minestrone101

@Sooson Different strokes for different folks. My Corolla is still holding up. I suspect I'll get another in 1-2 years.

Again, I don't assume what someone means. I can do my research and find the value of a car. You can't bring forth peer reviewed data on cuddler background and preferences. But what you can do is try out different approaches for yourselves : is there a better response rate based on different pictures, profile summaries, and content if messages. Of course, if you're already happy with your results, then there's no reason to change. If you are unhappy, it's good to apply the scientific method and change up the tactics and weigh your hypothesis and your conclusions.

Sooson

@Minestrone101 Stick to Toyota my man . I just got a brand new Highlander but won't let go of my 06 Camry. It's worth more to me than what the market value is.

Now that i read your profile how about a chess match to settle this debate ?

Minestrone101

@Sooson Yes. Toyotas run forever. I'm on 217k miles.

Sure man. I love chess .Not sure how it'll affect the debate, but I'm down for games. I don't mind assynchronous games w 14 day per move rules or if live, I like 10 min games but could settle for 15 mins. Less than that and I feel rushed and more than that I don't feel like a 25 or 40 min game agst someone who can't decide where to move. lol

Chess .com : I'm cylee1180 . Thanks man. Good game to you.

Sooson

@Minestrone101 i prefer live but we can figure it out . I will have to set up an account there . Used to have one on flyordie.com years ago . I'll stay in touch in DM if that's ok

170k on the 06 Camry, so it's not going anywhere anytime soon.

My 01 Camry had 210k when i totaled it.

Minestrone101

@Sooson Sure thing man. Yeah car accidents suck. hope you didn't get hurt.

Yeah Chess .com has some nice features and currently is the #1 used app. One of my old co workers works there now. I think he's CoachKane or CoachJkane. Jeremy write articles and does videos for the website and probably does some kind of admin or direction work for the app. He's a super strong player. I'm about an intermediate level player.

RedFox16

Well, if OP comes back, I think there's been some great advice offered. I'm sure it's been frustrating for him to come here to vent. But it can be helpful to try to see the POV of the pros you're reaching out to 🤷🏻‍♀️

I tend to respond to most of those who reach out to me, but I am more cautious with those who don't have a profile pic.
This is because a high percentage of the "no pic" cuddlers who reach out to me, disappear after 1 or 2 messages (TBH, OP even did the same thing earlier this month and disappeared after we exchanged a few messages). He did, though, make sure to send a pic via message, which is super helpful and helps the pro trust you more.

Most pros will require a pic before confirming a booking anyways, so why not just send the pic....or have one in your profile to start? Plus, I don't understand that part anyways 🤷🏻‍♀️
Why do I see so many people come and complain about not getting responses, but these are the same cuddlers that seem to be "hiding" who they are ....and lots don't have hardly anything in their profile either. It doesn't make me want to go meet up in a private place with someone who's hiding who they are, or not willing to share anything about themselves. Think about your own daughters or nieces doing this and what advice you'd give them about meeting with men who are complete strangers.... that hide who they are and don't want to give you any info.

Other than that, the ones I don't end up replying to are the ones who send 2 or 3 word introduction messages or who text at 11 pm and want to cuddle at 11:30 (yes, this happens often and tends to be those who are brand new and/or looking for something much more than cuddles).

Sunrise_Snuggle

I have a problem with pros that are unreliable about communication during the booking process. Communication during the booking process sets of the tone for the session. So, poor communication prior to the session is not a good start to the session. It's more trouble than it's worth, when there are other pros that are good about pre session communication.

Lovelight

@sunnysideup

"well if he deactivated, I guess there's not much point in my response, but I guess I'll leave my post up for other members who may be wondering about the same thing as the OP"

@BoomerSpooner

"If he deactivated he can come back at any second and read and comment on the posts. I deactivate when I am busy. Deleting your account is the permanent move."

Yeah, he might. I just thought some might like to know.