For those in need

pmvines

I thought I would start a thread aimed at those who might be feeling down, or lonely, or needy, or having a bad day and need to vent and need a platform to ask for support for themselves or somebody else. Like a prayer list, but instead think of it as a cuddle/hug list, or list for people needing some positive thoughts sent in their general direction.

Radiant1

Good thoughts, pmvines! I could certainly use a long hug and some cuddles right now. Alas, seems there's a cuddling drought in the DFW area.

That was a great idea. Some people are having a bad day. 

Others may be going through a longer rough time in their life. 

spenced25t

I'm going through a long rough patch, and my anxiety doesn't help matters. I'm new here and it doesn't look like too many are in my area but I could you a great cuddle or even a really tight hug right now. Caution I may cry a little not going to lie.

its very difficult to do anything on this website. I'm too embarrassed to look at and edit my profile bio, and simply having the site on screen hurts.
I created an account here because of how low I feel, but that is also holding me back

I have just survived & overcame more than a year of hell. While I survived, it took a huge emotional toll on me which was part of the reason I found this site. Unfortunately there are very few people in this remote area so it isn't easy to meet others also looking to cuddle. I just want to encourage anyone out there, no matter what you're going through, NEVER GIVE UP!! I wanted to so many times but my faith & my true friends are what kept me going. And my fur babies!

PotatoHead

Stay strong. Even bad times never last. I fought and beat stage IV esophageal cancer, lost both parents as well as my older and only sister to lymphoma when she was just 48 years old, spent over one week at ground zero often the September 11 attack and now going thorough cryotherapy for dysphasia. 

Every singke day is a precious gift. If there is anyone out there that is looking for someone to speak to, I'm here so please feel free to reach out. 

Radiant1

I've been through some rough times, for sure. So i know where you guys are coming from, even without knowing specifics. We do manage to get through those rough times, but it's nicer when you have someone to hold or hold you who understands you. Here's to us all finding the cuddle friends we need! Cheers!

kofadh

I was hoping that I would be able to find someone kind enough to want to get to know me and possibly become cuddle buddies but most people close to me either ignore me or ask for money. Even though I can pay, it just makes me cause no human should have to pay to get affection. We all need it.

kofadh:   Try to think this way :  assuming you have encountered a professional cuddler
there is an affection value .
and there is a time value .
you are willing to trade your affection , in exchange for someone else's affection in return . Both partners trade affection and time equally .  
You may find that there is someone who has affection for you , but no time to take out of their life , to show it . But if you could compensate them , for their time , they can accomodate you .  
Life is short , and a person must make the most of their time on this earth , to get to a comfortable position in their later years . 
Even though your affection may seem worth less , to a provider who charges , think of your payment to them , in the form of money , gave them a necessary "need" , be it help with a car payment , shoes for baby , tuition for school , IRA contribution . 
Try that and see if you feel satisfied . 
Does that help ?
did I confuse you ?

@kofahd I'm right there with you bro. Part of the cuddling experience is the equal exchange of affection. I refuse to pay for cuddling even if it means I won't be cuddling with anyone. To me at the end of the day I want it to be a 2 way street.

Now finding people on this site or any type of dating site is difficult. I know this isnt a dating site so but it has a lot of similarities. As a man I have to write messages and hope that what I said was enough to get their attention because I know I'm not the best looking guy. Most women dont respond. And the pool of women is tiny in my area. I find myself looking at the same women who I have interest in over and over again. Do I message again or should I just not even bother lol. They didnt respond the first time for a reason lol. Maybe I should move on from this site.

And to be fair I have cuddled with 2 different women. They are both great wonderful people. I just want to find someone who is closer and is as nerdy as me lol.

pmvines

Lately I have been acutely aware of just how lonely I am. I think it stems from all my friends living out of state. Having people who you care for and cannot see or talk with when you need them really can hurt worse then not having someone at all.

Yesterday, I had someone really tick me off by the way she approached me on another site. I'm going through a breakup and don't need the "come hither" nonsense at the moment. I pretty much read her the riot act and told her to never do it again. Relationships are always going to require communication. It saddens me when one wishes to give up so early, forgetting the sea of goodness which surrounded the rest.

scottgl

If I'm completely honest with myself...even though I've been single for about 4 months, I'm still bitter becaue my ex of almost 4 years moved in with a guy she kept insisting was just a friend, and kept lying about it for about a month. She wasn't real with me until I changed the locks so she wouldn't try to steal my dog. She was completely horrible to me the last few months we were together, even though I've always thought she was the one. We were best friends, cuddled every night, and were as close as two people could be. She completely cut me off, and stopped texting me. Last week I found out that I'm getting laid off from my job, because my position is being cut, and honestly I've been sinking deeper and deeper into depression. I don't really have any friends, and almost constantly sad. I tried meeting someone to date on dating apps, but ended up feeling completely rejected and had zero luck. I'm a great guy, was loyal boyfriend, and it's hard not to get down since I feel pretty helpless because I put everything into my job and into my relationship, but now it's hard to even get out of bed in the morning. I saw this website yesterday, and it really is a glimmer of hope for me. The thing that I miss more than anything is cuddling, and without it I constantly have a hard time sleeping, and feel pretty lonely and unwanted. I really hope I meet someone on this site, and if I do I think this bad luck in my life will start to turn around.

@scottgl I feel for you, big time. The last woman I allowed myself to attempt to love, before my most recent, disappeared for a month or so and admitted falling for another man. It wasn't until that man tragically died in a car accident that she and I were able to come back to a good place and become friends again. Now I'm in the middle of feeling abandoned again, after reopening my heart to another. Love is great when you have someone you can count on, but utterly and hideously painful when you find out you don't. In my case, I've attempted to mend fences, but it is being met with silence.

Metalhead527

@scottgl, I went through pretty much the same situation with my ex. There's no worse feeling than giving all of yourself to someone, just to have them throw you away like you're nothing. I miss cuddling as well, and I'm here because I don't want to risk going through the same thing with another relationship. I hope your luck turns around.

scottgl

Yeah exactly, I couldn't have worded it better myself that's exactly how I feel. I keep telling myself that I should be over her by now, but I gave all of myself to her, and I always thought we would be together. I feel really lost, like the last 4 years of my life didn't mean anything. It's been the most difficult / painful thing I've ever been through because I was completely and truly in love with her. I've been avoiding getting close to anyone, and I've been hesitant the few dates I've been on, so I ended up in the friend zone. I really hope I can find someone on here that likes cuddling as much as I do. I can't afford $80 per hour for a professional cuddler since I like falling asleep cuddling. I would be out like a light if I had a cuddle buddy,

pmvines

Someone from my childhood passed away last week from alcohol related medical issues. He had been hiding a lot of it but we all knew he was not doing well. Just looked way too old and sick for his age. Another person from my childhood passed away in Feb from drug overdose. Had been clean and off the street a long time and was doing really well. Had actually done some work on my mothers house. Was dead from crack and heroin overdose with fentanyl. I am so glad I stopped doing drugs . So many people from my past have died and are in jail and are homeless, and cant stop being addicts.

I_am_Polylover

Sorry to hear about your loses. It is too bad that some people care so much about money, that the don't care about the harm they do in supplying drugs.
Jim

I could sure use a cuddle right now. I lost my furry sweetheart yesterday. She had cancer and I had to put her to sleep. I'm single and live alone, and have had my dog Missy all this time since she was 3 months old, so we were really attached to each other. I miss her so much already, but I've buried her and know I'll never cuddle her again, this side of the pearly gates at least. I've not had any interest from local cuddlers on this site since I joined, so I'm not going to even bother trying now. I did reach out to a lady I've met twice at a local Christian singles group, and she was sympathetic on the phone, and has since invited me over for dinner and a movie at her place this Friday night. But I don't think cuddles will be on the cards, and if I asked she would likely interpret it the wrong way. At most, I'm hoping for a good hug at the beginning and end of a nice social evening. Perhaps that will be enough.

pmvines

@Frankincense I'm sorry man, some folks don't understand just how important animals can be, and how they are part of your family. I hate you are going through that.

CNYMike

I had to put my dog to sleep last Thursday. She was 16 years and a handful of weeks old. She had heart problems and kidney problems. She'd been eating less and less food since October, and she was skin and bones. Thursday her rear legs gave out. I took her to the ER at Cornell University. Thanks to her heart, she wouldn't have survived the workup to determine what was wrong. And even if she survived the workup and the surgery, she would never walk again. So it was time. I stayed with her to the end and made sure she knew I was there, and that I was the last thing she saw.

I'm not sure how I feel. Not sure right now, but I have a headache and my back hurts. Stress? Something I did to myself last week? Both? Don't know. But she was all I had for 14.5 years, and now she's gone. If I can't get an actual cuddle, positive thoughts would be great.

@pmvines Thanks man, yes our pets are so important, their loss can sometimes affect us even more strongly than the loss of a human, because pets love and accept us unconditionally whereas humans are sometimes not very nice to each other. Missy was part of my family (it was just me and her), she shared my food, she slept on my bed, heck every night she even slept in my bed because we would spend a few minutes spooning before she would go to sleep at the foot end of my bed. We would go walkies together, spend time at the beach together, she was my little shadow that always followed me around. It's so painful that she's not with me anymore.

@CNYMike Oh man that's heartbreaking, seeing your dog steadily go downhill in her health. It was the same with my Missy; gradually at first over a few months, then rapidly in the last 3 or so weeks. Like you, I stayed with my dog to the end, made sure she knew I was there and that she was loved. It's good that you did that, so that she knew she was loved and cared for.
My thoughts and emotions have been up and down and all over the place the last couple of days, so all I can tell you is that there is probably no particular way that you're "supposed" to be feeling. Just cry when you feel like it, don't think you have to bottle it all up and be "tough". Those gut wrenching aches in your heart are a measure of the love you have for her, and the gaping hole she's left behind in your life. I'm right there with you man!

@CNYMike So sorry for your loss! Sending virtual hugs and good vibes your way~~

I_am_Polylover

I just lost one of my best friends last week, and learned that my 98 year old mother in Texas was doing very poorly. Now I just found out that she is unconscious, and my sister is having a hard time getting help from the hospice at the new level of care that is now needed.

I've been very busy for about the last week and haven't been here to speak of. I have quite a bit of catching up to do, and I am unsure of how long that might take.

Jim

sherylmckoy

Hello Jim! I am disheartened by your post and am sincerely sorry to hear what you're going through. I have suffered losses of family and friends so I understand completely what you're feeling. I will definitely keep you in my prayers. Everything will turn around soon.
Be blessed
Love Sheryl ☺

I_am_Polylover

I'm flying to the DFW area in the morning for my 98 year old mothers funeral. she passed away this evening at 8:22 pm central time. I could sure use some cuddling while I am there, if there are any non-paid cuddlers willing to see me on short notice. There isn't much time for me to get to know you, since I'll only be there a week.

Jim

I_am_Polylover

Thank you Sheryl.

Jim

Man, this post really hits me in the feelz.
I see we are many to go through pain, suffering, sadness, depression, anger, powerlessness, helplessness, vulnerability.
To all of you, be hugged virtually, wherever you are and whatever the pain.
I would feel quite disheartened if I were to keep this to myself, since it helped me ease many pains for myself : you can check out Wim Hof in the Vice documentary ( called "inside the superhuman of the iceman" ) or with a group on facebook, if you are interested.
I was really, really sad at some point, and coming across this, amongst other things, was really a great support.
I found all I needed from him for free on youtube.
Before checking the video posted below, which is a 7 minute clip with him and Joe Rogan, safety first - I sent a link towards facebook about what needs to be taken into consideration if you were to explore the topic further, since there are some risks involved if done in less secure contexts. ( a bit like climbing could or diving can be less secure if one isn't aware of how to go about it, for example )
https://www.facebook.com/icemanwimhof/videos/1017677138250235/

This works for both genders.
What he offers supports me as well as cuddles and works for me.
A warm hug to you folks,
AntoineD.

Perhaps this might support some as well,

@I_am_Polylover Sorry to hear of your loss Jim. Losing your mother must be one of the hardest losses to endure. My thoughts are with you. I hope you can find support and comfort from some cuddle buddies in your area.