Cuddle buddies vs Massage Exchanges

Thinking mostly about other non- professionals, but you pros can weigh in if you like, too. I’m wondering how many of the cuddlers on this site do or have done platonic massage exchanges (versus going to the local massage salon). If you do, do you massage exchange with the same people you cuddle, never, sometimes, or always? How does that confuse or conflict with the platonic cuddle buddy relationship?

BlueIris

I have done a platonic massage exchange with one person, who I met on a dating site. Have not done one with a cuddle buddy yet. I haven't known any of my current cuddle buddies long enough to have established that level of trust yet, so I can't speak to how it might change the cuddle buddy dynamic. I can only suppose that with the right person, it shouldn't change anything.

Updated to add: I was talking about completely nude massage, the way it's done at a professional massage therapist's office, with a just sheet draped over the body. If we're talking massage with clothing on, then yes, no problem doing that with cuddle buddies.

JasonCuddles

Massage is something I've actually wanted to be good at for quite some time. I'd need someone who was able to tell me what was good and what wasn't though. I'd meet up with someone here that wanted to do this and be okay with me not being very good.

One thing I am good with is the doggy scritches. I have confidence in that. I just need to translate that to the humans.

Lovelight

I agree with Blueiris!

I never put massage whether mutual or otherwise on the table. Though with time if we're both comfortable it's something we can talk about and as our trust builds try it out. After to just go from there.

Brandi

I give/receive lots of massages. And honestly, I cant speak for them, but for me, they are sooo much better than a masseuse.

I divide a one-hour session with a pro into half massage exchange half actual cuddling. I hope to meet more cuddlers on here both pro and otherwise who are into that.

Scarlette

I absolutely give and receive massages during cuddles! It's one of my favorite parts. It's extremely relaxing for my partner, which makes me happy and it's a way for my giving partners to pamper me a bit, which I also love.

With a partner/cuddler I LOVE giving massages. Neck massage, head massage, full body massage, etc.

I always ask if they want a massage.

Relaxing them relaxes me.

I enjoy a full body massage with oil. I’m not talking about the kind of full body that gets local spas shut down, but one that doesn’t lend itself to remaining fully clothed. That sounds like it might go out of bounds for the guidelines of this site, especially for you professional cuddlers. But then, what happens in cuddle session stays in cuddle session, I guess.

znrt69

Anyone interested in a massage exchange. I am not a professional masseuse but I do have lots of practice. I am a male looking for females in the north east area.

Missy87

The issue that massage presents is that unless someone is a licensed massage therapist it is against the law in the U.S. to offer massage and accept money for it. I have a friend who was offering massage services without a license, got busted by police for it and charged with misdemeanor for providing massage without a license, prostitution charge, spent a lot in legal fees, nearly lost her home, etc. over it. Now, if during a cuddle session someone says that they want a back or neck rub that is fine and I may oblige but I'm not a licensed massage therapist. I prefer to keep my cuddling sessions platonic and don't want any nudity or to go outside my comfort zone. Massages are something I am leery of after seeing what my friend went through, I think that if you are looking for a massage then you should go to a real massage therapist. It looks shady when you're asking us for nude oil massages and such and if that is your first message to me, I will block you. I have had those requests before.

Jayre009

Hi @Missy87
Was your friend operating out of a studio without a license. Because that is illegal, especially if it's implied that you habe one when you really don't. But just to give a massage while cuddling is not...

Granted if it makes you uncomfortable regardless that's how you feel but pro cuddlers are ok offering massage as long as they aren't portraying themselves as certified or licensed massage therapists.

Scarlette

My cuddle sessions never revolve around massage and I find it very hard to believe that the back rub, neck rub, foot rub that I give are illegal. As far as "nude oil massages".... obviously that's a no-no. But it's the "nude" part that makes that unacceptable. "Nude" cuddling, "nude" movie watching, "nude" anything else would be inappropriate here. Just like some people have a hard time with "platonic cuddling", I think some people have a hard time with "platonic massage". I grew up with my mom, my sister and I all watching TV at night, rubbing each others backs and heads and feet and legs. I'm extremely affectionate with my adult children and still give them massages. I have absolutely no issue with massage as a source of platonic touch. When incorporated into my sessions no one is nude. I don't know about anyone else but there is no chance of me turning down a massage!

CarlosHunt

I love giving and receiving massages, almost as much as I like close, tight cuddles. I will certainly oblige my partner if she suggests that I massage her. Similarly, I have occasionally asked for light massages usually on my back, shoulders and legs, and my partner has usually complied. I am certainly not interested in turning anybody in for a massage .... I'll leave that to the cuddle police (smile).

Scarlette

@Carloshunt we are one the same page with this one! A little aromatherapy+ candle light + massage oil + strong hands= one very happy Scarlette!

CarlosHunt

@Scalette - so the next time you're in the NYC area .. please let me know ......

Scarlette

@CarlosHunt - will do!

CuddleForDID

I would love a massage... It should be noted that all your nerves run through the spine so especially for someone like me who is constantly in pain the back tends to be a place where a lot of pain tends to sit and build up at.

For me as long as it's only about "My back hurts, can you please help me?" then it's purely platonic.

I'm really uncomfortable with the idea of going to a place where I'd have to take my cloths off. I'm not OK with doing that with anyone I'm not in a consensual sexual relationship with. That crosses a line a line for me.

I'm ok if my shirt happens to come up a little bit, things are obviously going to move to some extent as you're doing that. It'd be impossible to give someone a message with their shirt on and have their shirt remain perfectly still the entire time. Just as long as you're not intentionally trying to pull my shirt up.

That said... it's a little more awkward the other way around cause bra straps get in the way. Like I can deal with your shirt moving but I've never really known how to work around bra straps... and I don't know what you would call this thing but I was giving an ex a massage once while we were dating and thought I was feeling a bra strap even though she told me she wasn't wearing one and came to found out there was an elastic band built into her top so the shirt itself was kind of supportive like a bra without her actually needing to wear one... but it's not really conducive to giving massages with that bit of elastic getting in the way. Being that we were dating at the time she just took her shirt off showing me that the strap I was feeling was in fact part of her shirt and not a bra but obviously that wouldn't be an appropriate option in a platonic situation.

I might just need more practice and guidance in how to give a woman a platonic massage without her needing to at the very least have her bra unhooked under her shirt. That's a possible option where she would still be clothed just to get the straps out of the way if you were comfortable doing that. You could even go in another room to do that if you don't want to right in front of me and then I could leave the room so you can redo your bra strap before we cuddle. Obviously your shirt would never be off, that's not going to happen ever. But we could discuss ways to maybe do a massage if you wanted.

Massage has no place in platonic cuddling. A back rub over clothes, sure. A foot rub if someone isn't acting like it's a fetish for them, sure. But oil, removing a bra, moving a shirt out of the way - no. If I want a massage, I'm going to go to my massage therapist, like I did yesterday in fact. There's nothing like getting a real therapeutic massage with a trained, experienced, skilled, and licensed professional massage therapist. I only started getting massages this year and it has been life-changing for me.

sunnysideup

I read this as “cuddle buddies vs message exchanges”

ShaneSchrute

Yeah being naked and worrying about bras aren’t concerns for people engaged in platonic cuddling.

Maverick07

@Moxytocin I agree with you wholehearted

GentleMan1111

I find that it’s safer to avoid massages as well as physical contact in general. You can never be too careful.

Rezz

@CuddleForDID

A simple solution to this is to just not give back massages to your female cuddlers if you're not capable of working around a strap of fabric.
I give back rubs to many of my female friends through their shirts and have never once had felt the need to ask them to unlatch their bra. 🙄

SunsetSnuggles

@rezz Agreed. If you're trying to scratch their back, it's a pain, but I don't see how a back rub is affected at all.

~ Sunset Snuggles

Heatherrrr

I like to give and receive fully clothed platonic massages if my clients want to during a session. I think its a fun addition to cuddling!

I can't think of too many things in the world better than a good massage. But some massages are just night and day, I had a roommate who studied Reiki massage from monks in Bali, once you've had that sort of massage it's hard for most other massages to come close. All massages are still good but something it's just people putting their hands on you and rubbing and just ordinary, but sometimes it's surgical. I've had cuddlers say they also do massage and offer me one but never did because I'm guessing it would just be the ordinary type and I got kind of spoiled by the fee Reiki massages I used to get.

PlushandPerfect

Love giving and receiving clothed massages. My mom was a massage therapist for almost 30 years. She taught me everything she knew because some days she would come home so tired she needed one herself. Im now on the path to occupational therapy so i understand how important touch is in general and massage is just as important.

MaxCuddle

I enjoy giving massages. I either massage over the clothes or baby oil on the skin. I give my cuddle partner that option. I rarely recieve a massage during a cuddle session. If I need on from being sore from my job, I go to a massage salon.

SuperManCuddles

Fully clothed platonic massages, are a great addition to cuddle sessions (as long as two adults full consent). For me personally, it allows another way to relax!

quixotic_life

😂 ~
edit ~ clearly I should have continued reading through ALL the comments before posting mine... lol