Very interesting discussion! I have cuddled a few times, with 2 different cuddlers, and I met two times with each of them. I loved both experiences and I would repeat. Yes it’s sad when it ends but it’s a good feeling having had healthy intimacy while respecting the boundaries. I dis that when i was alone, but If you do that as a permanent replacement for a FWB or for a significant other, then I would suggest you rethink this, as you’ll get frustrated because this is not meant for that, unless there’s a special connection you both build, but that’s statistically not meaningful to bet for.
Yes. Once I begin to feel relaxed in my partners arms I hope it will just go on forever. I often stay overnight just so I can enjoy the special bond with my partner as long as possible, and I think they enjoy getting lots of extra cuddle-time too.
What ever lentgth of cuddle time together & however good it feels is squashed by stressful travel
@poolman I hear you on that. Between the airlines and TSA, traveling for work sucks now days.
@quietman775 Funny geography lesson.
I completely agree on how you see cuddling.
I usually feel a little sad when the cuddling session is over. But I also feel good, energized and totally relaxed from the cuddling session. I also look forward to the next cuddling session, to feel all those chemicals (dopomain and serotonin) again.
After each session that I have I am lucky enough not to feal sad, etc. After each one ends I feal so happy that I don't come off of it for s while and feal that nothing can bother me. When I am looking forward to another session I do get sad but I don't let it stop me from living my life.
Only if it was a bad experience... But normally I take a lot of precautions to avoid that. Normally they are quite nice and leave me with a great feeling.
This is why I do not want to pay for cuddles. You’ll go broke and become depressed. What you really want, in addition to touch, is to feel like you have a friend and someone who really does care, and not after your wallet, at the end of the day.
And two more points. What happens when the money is gone? You can’t afford cuddles. The cuddlers you thought cared about you don’t care that you’re now broke. They still want your money.
And what makes them “professional?” Nothing! Because they signed up and they are giving a portion of their profits to Cuddle Comfort? No! Every animal in nature cuddles. It’s instinctual. Do you think animals get training? No! Humans are the only animal that doesn’t give up touch for free. I would like to change that. It’s sad!
Eh...briefly sad but not totally sad. Only because I know I’ll see them again.
No not really . I feel happy that I was able to share something nice with a cool human . If it is causing emotional harm I suggest getting to the root of that . Cuddling is a fun activity and can have some therapeutic benefits , however it won't fix your root cause of a problem
Actually I DO. My cuddle sessions are usually 2 - 3 hours in length. As I drive away, invariably I feel jipped. But I also KNOW it is because the time goes by so quickly in a good cuddle session. I tip well (I wouldn't say generously, 30%). Before I ever arrive home, I'm already longing for another all too-short session!
There are so many things to be sad about in this world. Leaving a great Cuddle session does not rise to the level of tears or sorrow like genocide and catastrophes do. In fact, if you feel and can empathize with the unbearable grief of the people around the world who endure the genocide, poverty and loss that we witness in the hour to hour news cycle then a cuddle session is an emotional oasis which is nothing less than an absolute joy. I would be selfish to feel sad about that.
This is cause we are supposed to cuddle with someone who cares for us...
If someone cares for you you should consider yourself fortunate and happy. The opposite is like having a PlayStation and then having it taken away—first world problems that are not really problems.
@cuddleguy1977 Thank you for sharing in this thread. I see your points and have learned from them. I am feeling sad before a session and after a session and in between, i am just feeling sad about this whole process. It is just hard to find a long term solution to touch deprivation.
I have not had a session yet, still thinking it over and looking into all of this, the pros and non pros. When i said i am feeling sad before and after, i mean i am just sad about this whole process and situation. Hopefully, i will come to clarity soon and find a way out of it, even if it means self cuddling/touch.
Thanks again for sharing in this thread, it is a important topic, that i missed when browsing through the forum.
Always a bummer when the session ends!
It's true that there is a feeling of emptiness, even a sort of anticlimax after a cuddle ends. But that empty feeling can be buffered with mindful before and after cuddle care. Good open-minded conversation that encourages and maintains social connection through thoughtful follow up when a cuddle ends. It might be a simple check in text to see how a person is feeling. Or a phone call to share feedback about the cuddle. Or a message to compliment a person on something s/he said or did that positively impacted in a spiritual or emotional way. Or it might just be a funny picture or text from a face book or Instagram page you know a person may enjoy based on your interactions before cuddling. Any gesture that shows the person continued care and interest helps to combat it. It won't necessarily take away that feeling. But it can help to lighten a mood or lift a spirit. Cuddling is always the easy part. It's the in between that's challenging.
A lot of guys are going to feel resent because they had to pay for a cuddle never done it but this is what others have told me. Makes them feel embarrassed and ashamed at times.
@Chocolatetreat i resemble your statement
You guys are killing me. I'm snuggling you all from afar.
@littermate You better ask permission first
Cuddling with pros turned out to make my depression worse. It was helpful when I had more disposable income but once you don't have that extra cash for cuddles it hits hard having to do without cuddling anymore. Thankfully not every cuddler is a pro so all is not lost
I feel sad everytime an awesome cuddle ended. Someone that I made a great connection with and was very gentle and affectionate is always hard to leave. It breaks my heart especially when I cant see them often because of their schedule.
What you're describing is not unlike sub drop.
@melancholy that's why discounts and free hours are a must people need it and as someone who applied to be pro I believe in going above and beyond for cuddlers. The money goes back to helping provide relaxing sessions from candles n massage materials, aromatherapy, food, drinks, etc.
@tallteddy hahaha and right on
I feel good after cuddling. I, too, struggle with feeling disconnected in my life but cuddling gives temporary relief and then I feel content for awhile. If I crashed afterwards, I'd probably try to figure out how to soften that so that I don't end up feeling worse off. For me, being with friends or doing something social really helps, so I'd probably plan to do something social afterwards or shortly after so it wasn't such an abrupt transition, maybe invite someone over for dinner and cook them a good meal. Another thing I find that really helps overcome feeling disconnected is doing something for someone. My irregular schedule has kept me from doing volunteer work but if I can do something to help a friend, that gets the focus off myself and onto someone else. We're all different in what makes us feel content. I have a friend who has a hard time interacting with people but she loves animals so she volunteers at an animal shelter. If you can identify what it is that makes you feel content in life or gives you joy, that might help turn down the volume on that post-cuddle downcycle.
I just remembered something I used to do in high school. There was an old folks home a block away from my school. It was not an elegant place. I got this idea to visit old folks there. I walked in one day, went to the main desk, and told them I had free time that I wanted to do something meaningful with and asked if there were any residents who didn't get visitors who might enjoy a visit. She directed me to one older lady in particular and introduced me to her. The lady was blind and had dementia but she was very sweet. I began to visit her whenever I could. Since she didn't have much memory, it wasn't upsetting to her if I was irregular about it. One time she asked me what I was wearing and I told her. She said, "Oh, you should wear that red skirt. You always looked so pretty in that red skirt." So after that I'd always tell her I was wearing the red skirt that she liked so much and that made her happy.
Anyway, getting our attention off ourselves and onto someone or something else helps a lot. It's easier said than done because when we're in that downcycle, it's hard to get out of it. That's why I think it's good to plan ahead because once you're in it, trying to get out is like trying to crawl out of a hole.
Well, that's my two cents. I hope you find something that works for you so that cuddling can be a joy and not a precursor to an emotional crash.
Have moments of loneliness when I crave touch and can only have it platonically and only for a moment.
This site I use for only platonic cuddling but outside this website I would love to be in a romantic relationship where I can get it 😉 and platonic cuddling anytime. Now that I experienced platonic cuddling it is forever going to be in all my future romantic relationships.