How to find a cuddle buddy on dating website

Hi ! Do you think i should be straightforward to find a cuddle buddy on tider for ex ? Saying something like : " Hey i know it's a little bit weird but i'm gonna be totaly honest, would you like to cuddle with me ? I'm really not trying to have sexe but just share love and tenderness. So what do you think about it ? "

Comments

  • I don't see anything wrong with it. I really don't know how much luck you would have with it but as long as you're polite about it, I don't see the harm in it. Good luck @rody

  • I found my cuddle buddy on a dating site almost 10 years back. We started with dating and it turned into cuddling as we both enjoyed cuddling the most. why would you want to find cuddle buddy on dating site? I came out in the market after 10 years to look for cuddle buddy and to my surprise so many cuddle sites.

  • Mainly because there is no cuddle website in france

  • I don’t see the harm in it either! Though just be prepared to have some confused responses because yeah, dating sites have varying uses. Some folks just genuinely wanna make friends there sometimes and some folks like to act like dating websites can’t be used for non-dating things lol it can be platonic too!

  • Stellarosass makes a good point about confused responses. A male friend attempted to find a cuddle buddy on dating sites and the women didn't get it. When he discussed his interest in platonic cuddling, the women all profoundly proclaimed their desire for sex. One even told him something to the effect that she would feel very threatened just cuddling without having sex.

  • Been there. Before I discovered CC, I signed up to a couple of dating sites and was very open about my desire for platonic cuddles only, and was seeking a long-term cuddle buddy.

    Even though initial chats were promising, as soon as I met various dates in person, it became obvious that each was looking for something different - a new emotional relationship. One woman was in a broken marriage and looking for a way out, but most had been alone for a while and wanted a new love.

    I know my profile was not the cause of these mismatches as I varied it across different dating sites. Now that I have discovered CC, I know that we are centrered around a common expectation for platonic cuddles, although there will always be the occasional creep that gets in under the radar.

    So, well done CC. Thanks for being there.

  • I've met cuddle buddies through dating sites and it was alright, as there are some people who are open to that. I do think if you meet someone that way, they will be more likely to hope or expect it will turn into a romantic relationship eventually, though. You might have more luck with polyamorous people who already have partners, as they will already be getting some of their romantic/sexual needs met. I cuddled with one poly person for a few months and it worked out well.

  • I've thought about doing this again. The first time I did it I found a buddy who wanted something more. She tried to guilt me into starting a relationship with her and I felt super uncomfortable. I do worry about people wanting more, but I'd be willing to give it another shot. I have two cuddle buddies but our schedules are so different that our sessions--while long and super comforting--are often far and few in between. Here's to another venture down that road.

  • edited March 2019

    I tried. Met a person, or two we didn't work out due to distance, etc. Though, my approach was to do an introductory on my profile and I basically stated that I am looking for: "Platonic cuddle partners, or just friends." As well as giving some filters. Then whoever interested contacted me.

    I'd not use the word "weird" etc. Just go in bold, and confident. Though, my way was to let those interested contact me by matching them, and having my goal on my profile. Haven't seen your profile yet, though, if you are a man, it could be somewhat different in getting messages. If you go my way, than include something to help put women at ease in contacting you, like: Welcome to message, and I'll respond asap. Or: Don't shy to contact me. ?

    Also, you might want to try other alternatives to Tinder as well. Maybe one other site.

  • The responses above mines, as amazing! ?

  • "When he discussed his interest in platonic cuddling, the women all profoundly proclaimed their desire for sex."

    I find that hilarious.

  • I have met cuddle buddies/friends through dating sites. But you are talking about tinder? Tinder is known for being even more sex/hook up based than other sites/apps, so I wouldn't go that route. But you could definitely look for that on okcupid -- I am. I wouldn't approach them immediately with that directly, engage them as a person, try to make a friend first -- just put that you're specifically looking for cuddle buddy only on your profiles.

  • @Babichev If the women were on Tinder it would not be shocking. That is nothing more than a meat market hook up app and everyone knows it.

  • Its easy to find a cuddle buddy on a dating site just find somebody who's interested in dating you and invite them over to watch netflix and chill lol

  • @Chocolatetreat I just found out what that meant yesterday!! hahahaha How did that become code for doing the nasty?

  • @PaulaDahla its just a natural thing your watching movies, or a tv series and one thing leads to another lol

  • Who wants cuddles if so send me a request

  • Cuddling is not dating, or a substitute for dating. So my take on looking for cuddle buddy on a dating site is just an invitation for confusion. Unfortunately, cuddling is not a mainstream/widely accepted activity -- most folks just don't get the concept of platonic-intimacy or the distinctions of sensuality vs. sexuality that we navigate in the cuddle space. Not to be too harsh, but your question is a clear example of this.

  • I beg to differ about how Tinder is used (FunCartel above) . My daughter uses it to find new friends -- she's visiting me and found a young woman her age and spent the evening socializing with her and her friends. I can totally see her negotiating to just cuddle with someone using Tinder - but the younger folks are a bit more flexible and smart in these areas than we are in my experience. And I also agree with some of what has been said about the context being problematic and very likely the success rate (success being actually drama-free cuddling) might not be very high.

  • I think it's worth a try to find platonic cuddle buddies on dating apps - you just have to be very honest and up front about your boundaries and what you want. You also might have better luck on asexual dating apps like AceApp. I've come across a few asexual people on mainstream apps like Tinder though, so you might be surprised.

  • edited January 13

    I joined this site because i loved the idea of a genuine cuddling session , I'm one who have never paid and never will pay for sex . I respect everyone's preferences and opinions in the matter, not trying to make a new subject *** my point is , now that i have a greater idea of what cuddling is about , whether strictly platonic or non platonic at all * i think it's safe to say that you could easily find a cuddling partner in a dating site, it's all about how skilled you are at educating a person when they inquiring about it or intrigued on your add .

    It's all about information .
    Good luck @rody

  • I’m not sure if this helps at all but someone I know closely actually found a cuddle buddy online on the tinder app. Turns out it helped that their profile specified that they identified as ace (asexual) so they weren’t at all looking for anything sexual so cuddling was totally up for discussion, without any ulterior motives

  • Pay-date websites are a potential source of cuddle partners as well.

  • I have met a couple of folks on craigslist for cuddling back before they shut down the personals . Of course 99 of 100 responses were from bots and sex workers but it was nice when I did get a genuine response from somebody

  • I’d try okcupid there site is geared towards dating and friends

  • It's a little more difficult to find cuddle partners on dating sites but it's doable! It all boils down to wording. Rather than say "cuddle buddy" use other phrases such as "friends who don't have hang ups about platonic affection" or "platonic cuddle buddy (emphasis on platonic)". This has helped me out wonderfully. In my experience you're more likely to find platonic cuddle partners through dating sites among the queer and polyamorous community.

    OkCupid is a great place to start. I'd be cautious on apps geared towards hookups such as Tinder. It's really hit or miss. I wouldn't use PoF (personal preference). Reddit has a great cuddle buddy community as well. I met my first enthusiast on /r/cuddlebuddies; we've been cuddling for almost a year now and it's flourished into a wonderful friendship.

  • @calineur I've never heard the term "pay-date website" - so before I leap to any conclusions, what is one?

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