Hurting Because of The Past

edited January 14 in General

Hello, Just need to release something in hopes of maybe helping someone else too. As a child an older female "family" member did some inappropriate things, not going go get into anything in detail. I must have been around 7 years old and she was a teenager. The worst part is that for all those years it especially brought shame and disgust because we were "related". Although that ended up not being true because of me finding out about being adopted 8 years ago. The thing is that I'm positive these childhood traumas have caused me to act certain ways in regards to women over the years. Thankful for the ability to practice platonic touch through this site but not without temptation. A work in progress. Urging anyone who is struggling in any area to look throughout life and know there's reasons why. Thanks for letting me share this!


  • @NewGuy711 - I'd advise you to see a professional therapist to work through your issues. And try to find someone with experience in your type of problem. That isn't always easy, especially if you don't live in a big city.

  • @NewGuy711
    That's another benefit of long-established female pros, they won't push boundaries on male clients.

    Bad memories can't easily be erased, but they can be wrapped up in thick layers of good memories, so whenever you reach the bad ones, you are protected by the good ; like having to crawl through a tunnel smeared with sunblock, in order to stand outside on a sunny day.

  • Temptation is always lurking around there somewhere. But we are defined by our actions (and conscious decisions to act), not our thoughts. Wait, there are still no Thought Police, right? I thought I heard a siren outside.

    Gotta go.

  • I concur with @UKGuy . But not just this discussion . This is the second or third one you started , Describing , some hurt from your past .
    I hope you feel better

  • I appreciate @NewGuy711's vulnerability and sharing. I think it breaks the ice for others who feel similarly. This forum is open. As far as I know there aren't rules about how vulnerable you can get or what your content is or whether it pleases everyone or if it advertises that you need therapy -- my sense is vulnerability like this is partly a result of some successful therapy, not a sign that he needs diagnosis. He has probably done and is doing some healing and simply wants to be heard and offer his experience and vulnerability (you tell me @NewGuy711 - maybe the suggestions for therapy are just the ticket but my bet is you've got that covered). I think it's brave for him to share his experience as a shout-out to others who may have had similar experiences and to me, this thread is for them primarily.

    So I say, two thumbs up, brave, may the others who share your experience feel safe enough to join in despite the folks who might find the topic a bit too underbelly for their tastes. This stuff DOES impact our cuddling experience and why not have a thread for those who have that experience, if the space can be honoring enough for you to feel safe to express yourselves. Talk about spaceholding! Here's our chance to practice.

  • I have said it before and i will continue to say it. Though i do applaud anybody who chooses to share personal and at times extremely personal things about themselves, i do encourage folks to please use caution and not forget that this is the internet, and once it is out there it is out there. So exercise caution and make sure that you are not just reacting in the moment and out of being emotional when sharing. Just my two cents.

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