Interesting Visitors at My Door

[Deleted User]Tazman5307 (deleted user)
edited January 2021 in General

While I clearly ask to only ask for females for cuddling on my profile and also that I am straight, for some odd reason I am receiving men looking at my profile.

Saaay Wut!

Not concerned too much but just curious would that happen? Is it just me?

Hmmm...

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Comments

  • Mike403Mike403

    @Tazman5307 - Because you posted in the forums.

  • mtpmtp

    For one thing, how are people to know that you are only interested in women until after viewing your profile? Participating in the forums is going to lead to people clicking your username to read more about you, for a variety of reasons, whether or not they would be a potential cuddle "match".

    And it's not just you. @CuddleMeLater made a similar observation in this thread: https://www.cuddlecomfort.com/forum/discussion/9883/lots-of-views-but-no-bookings

  • SideonSideon

    Hi, @Tazman5307 - from the FAQ thread

    If you click on Visitors you can see a list of users who have viewed your profile recently. Don't let it concern you if it includes people you are not interested in cuddling; they didn't necessarily find you while searching for someone to cuddle.

    There can be all kinds of reasons why someone might view your profile: you said something interesting on the forum and they wanted to learn more about you; they are just interested in people's profiles; or they might even have clicked on your name by mistake (easy to do on a mobile phone).

    The majority of men on this site are straight, and you're lucky that there's one gay moderator. Ta dah!

  • Mike403Mike403

    I personally think it shouldn't tell you when somebody visits your profile. It's a useless feature that just makes assumptions. If they're interested, they'll message you.

  • [Deleted User]CuddleMeLater (deleted user)
    edited January 2021

    @Tazman5307 Almost all of my visitors are also men.

    This isn't hard to figure out. There are basically two reasons:

    1. There are a lot more men than women on the site.
    2. As far as I can tell, many women don't spend much time browsing the site or clicking on random profiles. I think a lot of them literally just make a profile and then wait to receive messages.

    So, naturally, if there aren't many women here, and a large percentage of the women who are here don't really browse men's profiles... a lot of your visitors will be men.

  • cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream

    I felt the same at the very beginning , like I thought I would only be viewable to the females since I have my settings set that way, but than I noticed that people would click on my profile out of sheer curiosity, especially after posting on the threads , i definitely have more views from the guys than I do from the ladies , but I know (or believe ) that the 2 main reasons for this is because of my presence on the forum / & because there are more males than females here , & no I don’t think they are viewing my profile romantically or to seek me out for cuddles lol

  • [Deleted User]Tazman5307 (deleted user)

    Indeed! There are a LOT more woman cuddlers than men; it's about demand and supply. Given that ratio, indeed a lot of men are out looking for female cuddlers and another percentage seek men. Thanks @Mike403 @Sideon @mtp @CuddleMeLater !

  • [Deleted User]CuddleMeLater (deleted user)
    edited January 2021

    @Mike403

    I personally think it shouldn't tell you when somebody visits your profile. It's a useless feature that just makes assumptions. If they're interested, they'll message you.

    I actually strongly agree with this! It promotes kind of a paranoid mentality. I've seen posts complaining about people visiting their profile multiple times, when that's actually harmless behavior.

    A long time ago there was a post by a pro complaining that men visited her profile without booking, and IIRC she actually blocked men who visited her profile without booking... Which is probably the most insane, boneheaded thing I've run into on this forum.

    On the other side, sometimes I also hesitate to click on a profile I think I may have seen before, out of concern the person will think I'm stalking them... which is silly; I should be able to freely look at profiles without this ridiculous concern.

  • [Deleted User]Tazman5307 (deleted user)

    @introvme :-) Well...I will admit, seeing lovely ladies come looking at my window is very flattering (and good for the ego!). If men who prefer men look at my window, well, indeed I would run to the bathroom very fast, yet after analizing the responses here, it's all about attraction!

  • Mike403Mike403

    @CuddleMeLater - That's one way to get men to decide to book them. Block them. 😂

  • [Deleted User]Tazman5307 (deleted user)

    @Mike403 Amigo...

    I think women do have a reason to be concerned if a man would come peeping through the window 13 times a week :) But, then again, it's is about shoppers looking for a product...so

  • cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream
    edited January 2021

    I agree with the first part , it is very flattering when there’s a lovely sweet wonderful lady come look at my window , especially if I’m very intrigued by her, but as far as the last part (“yet after analyzing the responses here, it’s all about attraction”) I kindly disagree ... but you will soon learn this as well...

    Edit: or realize it

  • [Deleted User]CuddleMeLater (deleted user)
    edited January 2021

    @Tazman5307

    a lot of men are out looking for female cuddlers and another percentage seek men

    I don't think the majority of men browsing men's profiles are doing so because they're interested in cuddling men. They're just looking at profiles out of curiosity. I have no interest in cuddling men but I've looked at many men's profiles.

    That said, I have definitely received more cuddle invites from men than women, despite only listing "Cuddles women" on my profile.

  • Mike403Mike403

    I have a habit of clicking on names on the forum which may be multiple times if they're a regular forum user. That doesnt mean I'm stalking them.

  • [Deleted User]Tazman5307 (deleted user)

    :-P hahaha @introvme

    Yeah, I agree. Once I was biking in Royal Oak (MI) during the summer and me biking right a bar where apparently a lot of gay men were gathering and once they saw me...that all cheered "yeah baby...look at you!"

    I went around the other slight creeped out! I mentioned to my then GF and said that I should honored that men found me attractive then. I'm still processing that after 16 years since that incident...lol

  • sunnysideupsunnysideup

    When I didn't participate in the forums, I wouldn't get any visitors on my page unless I visited them first.

    Once I started posting in the forums, I'd get male visitors, and the occasional female visitor, which I assume are from the forums.

  • [Deleted User]Tazman5307 (deleted user)

  • cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream

    you’re mostly right(in my opinion) about attraction (after thinking about it) , if someone looks at your profile & you’ve never interacted in the forum not once, than something about your pic thats up intrigued them.... when I first joined & was seeking cuddles near me, I would look at both female cuddlers with pics & without pics because I’m a profile type of person, I love reading profiles & like reading the details because I feel it tells me a lot about the person , so I would hate to think that the ladies without pics who I visited would think I was attracted to their blank standard cc profile pic 😂😂

  • xeldaxelda
    edited January 2021

    Gender doesn't always show up before clicking on a profile (eg: no gender indicator on forum posts, in the list of people that show up in my search, on the home page of new cuddlers or recently online).

    Also, your "clearly ask" is only clear once someone actually visits your profile.

    Now... if you clearly asked in your profile, and men repeatedly sent you cuddle requests despite that, there may be a reason to be surprised.

  • CuddleKhat72CuddleKhat72

    I've experienced the same issue. I'm not gay nor cuddle with men. However, there are straight men that cuddle with other men, and if they look at my profile, well that's cool, and they can see I only cuddle with women. Gay people are here and we should treat them and accept them like any other person. Nothing wrong with taking a peek.

  • [Deleted User]squeakytoy (deleted user)
    edited January 2021

    I can definitely relate to some of this. I make it pretty clear in my profile that I'm only looking to cuddle/connect with women and build more queer community here (of course, making exceptions to chat with cool people I meet in the forums). But I do still get messages from guys who haven't read anything I've written. It's like... bruh. :tired_face: Why do I bother?

    I don't mind the visitor tracking, though. It's fun to scroll through and peek at some of their profiles too. :smile:

  • Mike403Mike403

    @squeakytoy - A lot of men are purely visual creatures. They don't care about what you've written. They just look at the pictures.

  • [Deleted User]squeakytoy (deleted user)

    @Mike403 That is definitely the impression I've gotten a lot of the time. :(

  • Mike403Mike403

    @squeakytoy - I suggest putting what you're looking for at the beginning of your bio in all capital letters and to not contact you otherwise. We would hope they would at least get that far.

  • [Deleted User]CuddleMeLater (deleted user)
    edited January 2021

    I try to put myself in the mindset of a man who just messages without reading a profile.

    There's one scenario where I kind of get it, but it doesn't really apply here.

    Years ago, on pre-Tinder dating sites, men would have to compose messages to women and there was no such thing as a "match." So you'd just browse profiles, read about a woman, send what seemed like a unique, interesting, and relevant opening message, and then she wouldn't respond. And then you'd do the same with another woman, and then do it again, and again, and again, and again. After you've written 30+ messages like that and none of them got a response, you do one of two things: you either quit the site, or you just start blasting out tons and tons of low-effort, single-sentence messages in hopes that just by sheer quantity of messages you start getting responses.

    But I don't understand it on CuddleComfort. There just aren't enough women for the above scenario to happen. There are literally 6 non-pro women in my current area.

  • [Deleted User]squeakytoy (deleted user)
    edited January 2021

    I suggest putting what you're looking for at the beginning of your bio in all capital letters and to not contact you otherwise. We would hope they would at least get that far.

    @Mike403 Hmm... as much as I hate having to do something like that, I may give it a try and see what happens. I've seen a few other women on here doing similar things in their profiles. Maybe it's helped them.

  • LyleLuvsHugglesLyleLuvsHuggles

    I've had quite a few more male visitors than female some I've had chats with mostly about cars, I'm guessing to due to my post on the hobbies thread lol

  • [Deleted User]squeakytoy (deleted user)

    And @CuddleMeLater , I don't get the reason either. You wouldn't think it would happen here, eh?

  • [Deleted User]Tazman5307 (deleted user)

    @squeakytoy Precisely. So there is like a 1 to 10 ratio of men to women as pros, but there are a LOT of men here looking for comfort so...there it is!

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    I troll my profile and i find it problematic that i haven’t reached out.

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