Been trying to try this out for awhile now and I just haven’t got and good feed back or response from people
Are you targeting enthusiasts / pros or both?
If you don’t mind try adding a pic (even if private that you can share later on ) & a different pic than the default one to make you stand out a bit. The more info you add about yourself in your about me/ profile the better …
when reaching out try not to be pushy or just straight out trying to book or set up a cuddle, refer to something you saw/read on their profile & relate to it or make conversation about it so that they can see you took the time to read their profile & see what they’re all about … hope this helps
Getting replies is tough for men. Period. There are WAY more men on this site than women so the women who are here get a lot of messages on a regular basis. Men, not so much. I've sent tons of messages to women and got no response from most of them. All I can say is that be polite and respectful and keep trying. I've been lucky and found a few cuddle buddies, but it took being diligent in searching for one.
When picking women to reach out to look and see the last time they were on the site in their profile. You could also see if they received karma and when from people they've cuddled with. I think a lot of people come and go from the site.
If we can get the link to the site out there more people will join.
I also agree with cuddlesndreams. If you make yourself stand out more your messages will get noticed over the others. That's especially a good idea if there are more women than men. I think the women to men ratio would somewhat depend on the area you live though.
Chorizo and eggs sound good right now
The above replies are 100% correct that there are way more men than women here. My personal recommendation is actually to not even try to connect with non-pros on this site, although of course it is possible if you've got the right combination of appeal, persistence, and/or luck.
That said... and I don't mean to be an ass with this question, I really am honestly curious... Why is your profile so sparse? I mean, if you've been trying to connect with women for months, and not having any luck... wouldn't filling out your profile to be more appealing and less generic be one of the first things you should try?
Seconding @cuddles_ndream and @CuddleWho 100% - even if you're not comfortable putting your face out there I'd add a picture without it/facing away/obscured or just a picture of something that represents your interests or where you live.
Completing your profile, having a photo, explaining what you're looking for in a cuddle; this all gives people a sense of who you are, which is important when safety and comfort are the primary concerns when meeting a new cuddler. Good luck!
Filling out the profile isnt going to be much help. Not 1 from within 2 hours driving time has even bothered to look at mine. The only people who have looked at it has been those active here in the forums and 75% of them have been MEN Think the biggest problem is the men to women ratio. Fill the profile out tho and just keep plugging away.
@mkramer21 - That's pretty normal for a guy. You'll get no reply from most female non-pros. You will get replies from pros, or sometimes messages if you just visit their profile. If you are looking for a non-pro cuddle buddy, I would not rely on just this site. I've been on here three years and have met only one person and she shortly after turned pro.
Assuming you are talking about contacting enthusiasts, Have had same issues. Average ratio seems to be about 7 men to 1 women depending on the area, which makes it hard for men, but not impossible to meet with a female cuddler. Filling out my profile and adding pictures hasn’t seemed to help at all. I private message pictures of myself after reaching out to someone and that seems to help, maybe?
I’ve also been lucky and found a couple, but they didn’t say why they were interested in cuddling me so maybe I’ll ask next time.
The big three things I can say: 1) many women had bad experiences and are sensitive to red flags so be respectful and patient, ask about boundaries if unsure 2) how does your message stand out from the dozens of other messages she has in her inbox? If your message is plain she probably won’t even bother responding when there are other interesting conversations going on. I know this is exhausting when we get ignored so frequently but try to put something genuine and interesting in your message about yourself and ask them something too. If they don’t respond just move on to the next, try not to let it affect your self esteem and push onwards, their loss. 3) sometimes people just take a liking to us and I don’t know why so part of it is maybe just a numbers game and showing a sliver of your genuine self to many people, theoretically someone will gravitate toward you
Also, another thing try to make sure your photos show your personality. Clear, shoes face and eyes, maybe another that shows your body type (this is a cuddle site after all)
@mkramer21 Basically repeating some of the things folks have said above, if you want more responses, here are a few suggestions. 1. Add a profile photo. 2. Write a little more about yourself on your profile. 3. Make your message thoughtful and make it known that you actually took the time to read the profile of the person you are messaging.
I state exactly how to get a response from me in my profile and yet so many folks message me with a simple, "Hey, I want to book," to which I respond with something along the lines of, "Great. Read my profile."
Don't take this the wrong way, but your profile shows that you are pretty young, which might lead others to assume you are immature and therefore maybe a bit risky to meet. The way to overcome this perception is, as stated by others, elaborate on your profile, read the other person's profile and craft your messages to them to show your maturity and genuine interest in meeting them.
Hope this helps.
From my life experience and replies from dating websites l look scary some they thing I look criminal or pervert I didn't created my face God created people judge
Filling out the profile isnt going to be much help. Not 1 from within 2 hours driving time has even bothered to look at mine.
Well, you're kind of right. In all the time I've been here on this site, very few women visited my profile. Back when I used to message enthusiasts, they didn't visit my profile. Message ignored, no profile visit, it's hard to know what I could have possibly done differently. And usually when I message pros, they also don't visit my profile, even if they respond and agree to a session. It's honestly pretty weird. So I kind of understand feeling like the profile is pointless. Still, if you ever do message an enthusiast who is actually inclined to reply, at some point she's probably going to look at your profile and if it's basically empty that is not going to be appealing.
@Ahmedali999 It's not so much your appearance or the look of your face. You have 11 pictures on your profile and every one is a closeup of your face scowling into the camera in an intimidating way. It's a really strange choice and will surely make people wonder what in the world is going on in your mind. I can see with a second look that you're actually trying to smile in a few of those pics, but it's pretty subtle and easy to miss at first. Do you really not have any photos from further out, from other angles, where your smile is clear, where you look approachable and cuddly instead of psychopathic?
@CuddleWho I used to use that strategy further out pictures I have been using dating websites over 8 years only met twice 1 of them she just wanted money for drugs people need to accept who I am
@Ahmedali999 Well, if you really feel that scowling into the camera like a psychopath is a core part of "who you are", then carry on.
@Ahmedali999: People don't, in fact, actually have to accept who you are.
I learned this from my family, who are getting along just fine without accepting who I am. And also without me—but they don't seem to need me any more than they need to accept who I am.
Now, me, I used to need their acceptance (I really did, I was a kid and couldn't live on my own). But now I don't.
Anyway, people don't need to accept who you are.
Eye contact is really intense in some non-Western cultures. I get why a man might post close-up pics in order to show earnest intent.
@DarrenWalker I agree with you @CuddleWho thanks for your advice
A few points I see, your profile has no pic, barely any info in profile, no cuddle karma
Girls' primary concern is safety, and your profile wouldn't inspire confidence. You're just a stranger to her, and a faceless one at that. For all any of us know, you could be a serial killer. Such is the nature and anonymity of the internet, until she sees or meets or talks with you, you could be anyone hiding behind the screen. Sure, if they dug deeper maybe they could find out you're a good guy and you're safe, but girls won't often put in all that effort when they have options. Why would they choose you over some other profile with similar level of info, or one that does have a picture and info and karma? If you don't put in effort to stand out, I don't think they would put in effort either to research and try to see if you're a good guy.
Similarly, if you have a choice to send a message to a girl who's profile has a picture vs one that doesn't, which one would you choose? Or if one girl has been inactive for months, vs one that was on recently? You could message both, but the active one is more likely to be frequenting this site and hence you have a better chance of getting a reply from her
But I agree with what another person said, it's a numbers game for guys. So feel free to send messages, but don't get your heart set on someone until they've also shown some interest and effort. A lot of girls just come here out of curiosity, but never cuddle, or they try and have a bad experience and are turned off to it. Or they get guys who want more and push boundaries beyond just platonic (non-romantic, non-sexual) and friendly cuddles, which will also turn her off. For girls it's about safety and try to find out who's real and who's not. I understand it could be a bit embarrassing to have a pic, but not having one makes it much harder to trust you.
I majority get no replies also, but all you can do is try to improve your odds. I see it as, I can send messages and am basically giving people an opportunity. From there it's up to the women to take a chance and put in some effort if they want to explore it further and turn that possibility into an actuality.
I learned from being a shy kid growing up, that I missed my chance on a lot of good friendships and in getting to know my fellow classmates, by not trying to hang out with them and talk with them much outside of classes. And now that season's gone and I don't have those opportunities anymore. I regret doing so, but you can't change the past, you can only use it to try to improve your future. So now I get myself out there socially and try to offer opportunities to others, as well as try not to miss good opportunities as they come. Don't take it personally if they don't reply. You just keep moving forward and becoming a better you. If you keep incrementally improving, and ever keep on trying, imo it's inevitable you'll eventually find some kind of success.
Safety first though of course! For us guys too, there's always a chance the other person is not who they claim to be, they could be a scammer who only wants your money or to do your harm. So always take precautions whenever dealing with random people online (see the forum post about safety in cuddles). Let others know where you'll be, write the plans and details of the meet up through the (cuddle comfort message system) so that cuddle comfort has a record if anything crazy happens, etc etc
My tips - How I found happiness on Cuddle Comfort
I get my share of no reply's also. Probably for the reasons given above. I always try to be pleasant and not pushy. I realize that I am not for everyone but I ask that at least they recognize that I have sent them a message even saying "thanks by no thanks" would be enough.
I have even had several messages back and forth and then nothings. If some one looks at my profile I drop them a line in recognition. To me this is just common curtesy.
Thanks for letting me vent.
@mkramer21
like others said, show that you've read the person's profile and also careful not to miss key details. For example if she doesn't cuddle with someone who has a pet and you've one, then surely contacting her would likely not yield the desired result. Though mistakes happen, sometimes visiting someone once more if you're doubtful you missed something can help. Though not over do it so it comes off questionable. Also sending more than just a hi helps if you're contacting someone for the first time. Speaking of what to send, want to share with us what you typically send as a first message?
@Ahmedali999
regardless of whether or not it really achieves your desired goal of meeting others because there are many reasons you could be struggling to find. I think you'd benefit from having better photos and avoiding photos that are essentially duplicates. Smile, not so in your face type photos, and not as much bland backgrounds. I notice most of your photos are taken indoors and have pretty bland backgrounds such as the wall. So you could benefit from taking one or two in nature or while doing some hobbies you enjoy. Also I'd not go more than 5 photos of yourself. Personally I'd say 1 or 2 well taken photos are more than enough though.
@Lovelight thanks for your suggestions
@mkramer21 I think one of the biggest reasons you are struggling to find women Cuddlers other than the reasons you see above is one I am surprised a female enthusiast or pro has not pointed out. You list guest as the only cuddling location option. Women are not prone to inviting strangers into their homes for safety reasons, boundary reasons, and many of them have a child. You need to offer a hotel or Air Bnb option. Otherwise, you may be eliminated for that reason and not even know it.
@mkramer21 , women on this site as well as men want to make sure that they will be safe when meeting and cuddling with you. There is very little on your profile that says much about you. When reaching out to a pro or enthusiast what do you tell them about yourself ? I give a full description about myself including job, hobbies, and other information which makes them feel okay to meet me. If you cannot do it in your home, I would suggest a place to do it. As @FunCartel points out you need to give options to meeting the women for various reasons including safety.
I’m not surprised. No pic, essentially a blank profile. I wouldn’t respond to it.
No one owes anyone a response. I have it stated explicitly in my profile that if you want a response from me you have to have something interesting to say. I still get messages like, “Hello.” That’s it.
Contemplate this: apparently the ration of men to women on this site is about 4:1. On top of that, unless they are a pro, most women are hesitant to cuddle a stranger. It’s up to you to get their attention and make them feel safe.
I started a thread some time ago about my thoughts on how men might be more likely to get a response from a woman. There were lots of good comments on that thread.
Participating here in the forums is a good way to make connections. There’s a bunch of folks here I’d cuddle in a heartbeat because I’ve gotten to know them and, in fact, got to cuddle with someone I’ve gotten to know through the forums. We already knew each other, I felt completely at ease. You never know when someone is going to be traveling to your area or you might be in theirs.
Anyway, check out this thread. It might help.
I’d suggest making an appointment with a pro. You’re more likely to get a response.
https://www.cuddlecomfort.com/forum/discussion/5173/suggestions-on-how-men-might-get-more-cuddle-partners/p1
@DarrenWalker
Fact.
Might hurt if it's family/friends though but still true nonetheless.