@Mike403 i’ve only given karma one time and it was a complete lie. Please don’t hate me. I can’t even tell you all the entire truth because it was so disgusting. He messaged me a few days later and asked me to write karma for him and said that he would write karma for me. I told him no thank you to karma for me but that I would put something up for him. I should’ve never done it. Nothing was the truth. He’s a nice enough guy and he’s not gonna hurt anybody but... fuck. I can’t even be honest here. I’m sorry.
@quixotic_life and here is your next Instsllment of hush money 😉
I have no karma as I haven't cuddled anyone from the site yet. (That I KNOW of) I used to travel a hell of a lot more and cuddled all over the place so it's not impossible I've met some one before that would make for an interesting encounter lmao.
@Importance, I suspect this happens a lot. Don't worry, no judgement from me!
Hi, everybody. I am so sorry to see and hear this story. I pray that this poor lady, and all others like her, who have been mistreated, disrespected, frightened, or made to feel uncomfortable in ANY way, in ANY degree, will quickly receive the comfort, reassurance, and support they need. And, especially when any session, whether suddenly or slowly, becomes an experience of awkwardness, then shock or terror for the woman, she deserves the clear right to do WHATEVER it takes, to thwart the attack. Yes, all you predators out there, it's an ATTACK! You are scaring her, demeaning her, betraying her trust and good faith, physically hurting her, and probably psychologically traumatizing her for life. And you call yourselves MEN?! I have two grown daughters, two granddaughters (ages 9 and 4), and other female relatives, plus many wonderful female friends, so women have a special and dear place in my heart. I am 6'3", and weigh almost 400 pounds. When I hear of these sorts of incidents, I always wish that I could have been there, to kick the door open, or come crashing down through the ceiling, and enjoy the predator's expression, as I say, "IS THERE A PROBLEM HERE?" Yes, maybe a lot of "men" need to be told what "platonic" means, before a session. OK. But they should all already know the simple, short, and clear English words "NO!" and "STOP!" and easily understood expressions, such as "I DON'T LIKE THIS!" and "PLEASE DON'T DO THAT!" and "I'M NOT FEELING COMFORTABLE." And so on. I recently had my first two pro cuddle sessions ever, and they were beautiful. Yes, I was her client. NOT HER MASTER, NOT HER OWNER! In fact, odd as it may sound to some folks, I enjoyed her letting me have her head on my lap, while I caressed her face and hair, and listened to her experiences and feelings about various things! Thank you so much!
@fdavidm2 ~ I wish I'd had a dad like you!! Thank you for all of that!!
@Importance - I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable with that question. I'm just trying to understand you a little more. You don't have to answer anything I ask. You are still awesome in my book.
I'm always disappointed and frustrated when I hear stories of cuddle stories of creepy/inappropriate behavior. I do think some kind of accountability would be good. If we report someone we met from this site, I'm wondering what kind of action can be taken beyond just banning/deleting their account. It's maddening to think that someone would just not care and think it's okay to create another account and do it again to someone else. If the site collects a photocopy of users' IDs, I wonder if the site admins could then report the bad stories to local police. But then, I wonder if the police would take it seriously enough, or if there's even anything the police could legally do.
On a side note, I sometimes wonder why it is that men seem to behave this way much more than women do. Years ago, there was a time when I was on a date and I felt like I was touched inappropriately (somewhere without my consent) and felt weird (violated?) about it for a day or so (particularly as it happened in a semi-public place), but I rarely hear of men being violated by women in any way.
Yes all 6 of my daughters know how to defend themselves for exactly these reasons I'm very much a papa bear, and these stories always have me seeing red. I'm sorry you all have had to deal with such things.
~ It start's young!!! ~
~ Teach consent early and reiterate it often!!! ~
It's not just that, "No" means "No"...
It's that, ONLY "YES" MEANS "YES"!!!
I just happened to pop on here and run across this thread again. One of the things I've learned since joining is that a lot of things happen between cuddle buddies that are way more than just cuddles. I know this from conversations I've had with other cuddles on here. Is it wrong if the extra activity is consensual? I suppose not. But, what what if one of the parties is married? Forget the current condition of their relationship. But what if they approach another cuddles for more than cuddles? What if their partner approaches them? Should that be reported? Considering this is a site for "just cuddles", one could argue that it should.
I have a hunch there is a lot more "hooking up" going on from connections on this site than anyone is willing to admit to.
Groping someone without their consent is sexual assault. These people should be on a sex offender registry.
@cuddlestogive "Is it wrong if the extra activity is consensual? I suppose not." Yeah it is - because it's a platonic website extras are against the TOS. It's this kind of thing that gives people the idea that it's a covert dating or prostitution site and that it's not a big deal to ask the next person for extras. This is how people get reported and banned.
I let them know I’m licensed to carry
I hope your friend filed a police report for that. Sexual assault will stick better than a deleted account.
I’m so sorry that happened to her
@simsaddict this is why we have to get real life information and I will say it until I'm blue in the face.
All clients should provide all personal information and treat professional cuddlers as the professionals you are. Any incidents should be reported here to at least get the person banned and to police if warranted. Unwanted groping is sexual assault. Men will try to get away with what they can, and more in some cases, if that’s what they’re looking for. The best prevention is for the Pro to reiterate the rules, state that the session is platonic, non sexual, and restate the boundaries. Someone mentioned the idea of signing an agreement, I think that’s appropriate. A massage therapist probably goes through similar issues, they always take all info and an agreement of service is always signed. The more it’s treated like a business, the better. Unfortunately, there will always be dirtballs. I’m also all for pepper spray, taser, and other forms of violence when necessary.
@MaineCuddle Yasssss girl. Even when paying with online vendors(venmo, PayPal,cash app) most of the time real names are on there.
This is why I didn’t cuddle anyone who is traveling when I was actively cuddling. I also had a bad experience with a traveler cuddler. They also deleted and re-created their account.
Many times cuddlers will ask me questions either by video chat or on the site about my intentions for cuddling. This is a good way to screen out potential cuddle partners to see if they understand the nature of the site and what is expected.
You may also want to look at thee karma and profile to see what type of cuddler they might be.
If something does not check you can just not accept the cuddle.
@Lev136 that's not enough. People lie and you don't see all of the pros who report "I don't understand, this guy had lots of excellent karma from well-known pros".
That makes me quite uncomfortable. I’m my situation, I’m married and cuddling would have to be a secret. If something like that happened to me, I’d have no one to report it to. That puts me in a very dangerous situation.
@Lev136
Karma can be decieving. Some "pros" will lie when leaving karma, don't care if they get groped or even welcome this behavior.
Clients can be a perfect gentlemen with one pro warranting positive feedback and a disgusting pig with another. Quite a few pros don't leave negative karma out of fear of retaliation. They don't realize that the mods can and will remove negative retaliatory karma if reported.
I always encourage pros to directly message other pros from karma left to get an unfiltered review of the session. Multiple if possible.
@TwoPMcoffee yes, meeting people who want to remain anonymous could be a very dangerous situation. It's our responsibility not to put ourselves in dangerous situations.
I have a bodyguard that I pay and they sit outside while the session is happening. They know if i dont walk out in a reasonable time to automatically call the police an/or be prepared to come in, if i do not let them know by a call or text that i am coming out late. I also ask for a front and back copy of my clients driver's license. An to sign a contract when they set up a time with me. After all that, i see that many dont bother completing setting up an booking with me, which lets me know they probably did not have good intentions in the first place.
I think we should have to upload id when registering. There is a traveling user who has contacted me from a different username and phone number than the first time he did (previous name said it got banned!) I’ve never met with them because they throw off predator vibes. But I’ve sent the photos number and user name he contacted me with this time at least, but yeah what’s stopping them from continuing to come back, right? Luckily everyone I have ever asked to stop groping me has stopped, but jeez… hold people accountable. I think if CC wants to take a cut of session cost they should be providing some sort of safety security
StarFairy raises the point I worry about -- what happens when you ask someone to stop, and they don't? I have seen pros talk about getting up and walking out when the person they are with gets out of line, but I am concerned that one of these days the person molesting them isn't going to go along with that. Not to start that whole debate again, but that's why I agree with MaineCuddle. I think any cuddler is justified in taking whatever steps they feel they need to in order to feel safe, and if the other person doesn't like their conditions, they can find someone else.
Someone I saw is now banned when I look them up. What happened? Why are they banned?
@Lcudds - There are lots of reasons why people get banned but it all boils down to breaking the terms of service.
@Babichev, great, thanks for answering