All time best cuddling practices

ShaneSchruteShaneSchrute
edited February 2022 in General

Have you had amazing interactions with professional cuddlers who go above and beyond? I’d like to hear what they did that made it great, special, memorable, etc.

For me I had sessions with a cuddler who was all about every little detail to make it as relaxing and enjoyable as possible including:

• She’d encourage me to arrive 5–10 minutes early so I could change into cuddling clothes & get ready.
• She would offer me tea and do a short check in time with me before cuddling.
• There would already be a great combination of essential oils going in the room.
• She was open to requests (extra pillows, blankets, cuddle games, cuddle/platonic touch tools like makeup brushes.)
• Made sure the temperature was comfortable for me.
• She had housemates but was able to provide a completely private space & quiet house.
• She had relaxing music going before I got there (but allowed me to play something that I wanted.)
• Very clean place and a very cozy room to cuddle in with lots of options. Clearly so much went into making the space comfortable. It wasn’t even clear that it was her bedroom or just a room dedicated to cuddling.
• She clearly had just showered and had nails that were well groomed (yes we should all be well groomed; however this one cuddler would clearer put a lot of effort into it. She once pointed out there where was one tiny rough spot on a finger nail that she wasn’t able to get as smooth as she wanted before our session.)
• This might be my favorite: she has a great welcoming attitude and above all had an amazing enthusiasm for what she was doing.
• Always gave me 5-10 minutes after time was up to get ready to go. Never felt rushed.

I’ve had bad experiences with others too but I want to hear about the good ones. What about your amazing experiences?

Comments

  • xandriarainxandriarain

    @ShaneMTB Thank you for sharing. I put a lot of work into my cuddle sessions/ space and love to hear what other pros do. I am curious to know what cuddle games/ other platonic touch tools she used.

  • SSRequiescenceSSRequiescence
    edited January 17

    Edited for privacy.

  • ShaneSchruteShaneSchrute

    Hey @xandriarain you’re welcome! :) I’m happy to help.

    First of all, it looks like you have a lovely, cozy, welcoming space. :) Excellent.

    Fun Platonic Touch/cuddle Games:
    1.) The simple game that introduces consent is always fun for me. The first person asks for some kind of contact like , “can we touch hands palms forward toward each other high above our heads and hold there for a while?” Then the other can accept that or not. This goes back and forth 3-4 times.

    2.) Touch Brackets. It’s like sports brackets where fans try to determine which team will ultimately win the championship in large field of contenders but each team would need to win in each pairing of two teams. Instead of trying to figure out the best football team, the goal here is to determine the touch receiver’s favorite kind of platonic touch from a wide array of possible options. e.g. do you like light touching with just finger tips on your face while prone more than a 10 second mild standing bear hug?

    3.) A simpler version of touch brackets is “The eye test for your body.” Ever been to an eye doctor? They have that big contraption that shows you two possibilities for lenses that they put up to your eyes and show you an eye chart and ask you: “which is better number one or number two?” In the touch version you give the receiver two choices of, maybe, how to hold their hand while spooning with them. The difference between this and brackets would be fine tuning just one specific kind of touch instead of finding an overall winner of a wider variety.

    tools:
    1.) Head massager (like a cut up whisk with its ends made safe):

    2.) I like a pillowfort. :)

  • ShaneSchruteShaneSchrute

    @SnshineScarlett yay!! That’s awesome!! I’d like to add you as a friend if that’s okay for future reference. :)

  • BabichevBabichev

    @ShaneMTB - I had one of those head things. They are so cool! I would use in on myself on long car rides to Chicago to help keep myself alert and not get bored.

  • ShaneSchruteShaneSchrute

    @Babichev we’re all different and that is of course fine & good but for me it almost puts me to sleep! It’s so soothing. Sooo… I’d suggest anyone new to it: try it while not driving first. :)

    I’m so glad it brings you something good to break up that monotonous drive to Chicago. ;) I used to live in the Midwest.

  • Mela_BMela_B

    Thank you for sharing your appreciation! Those are all wonderful.

    I do all of these things and more. I have candles and incense that I keep in my cuddle room (which is a dedicated cuddle space).

    I have a mini fridge stocked with bottled water, sodas, and snacks in case a client has traveled and arrives thirsty and hungry.

    I keep lotion, breath mints, and hand sanitizer in the room for my cuddlers to use if they want to.

    I also always greet them outside and walk them in, and I always walk them out when they leave.

    I do these things because, honestly, they aren't just clients to me. They are human beings who deserve kindness and care, and I am quite fond of them.

  • JohnR1972JohnR1972
    edited February 2022

    @Mela_B
    I am going to have to make a trip to PA this summer for a cuddle with you. Your preparations and attention to detail speak volumes about how much you value your cuddle partners, especially your comment about walking them in and out 😊

    To everyone:
    I still feel like “the new kid” on here as I have only been cuddling for about 6 months and have only cuddled with 4 pros so far. All of my experiences have been very positive but I think the single most important practice is the greeting.

    That first 30-60 seconds can really set a tone for the whole session. Reading a distressing / upsetting text message while walking up the driveway (or while standing in the doorway while your cuddle buddy walks up the driveway) can absolutely kill the positive vibes that both cuddlers should be experiencing immediately before a cuddle.

    I am not saying it is impossible to recover from such an incident but it can be a lingering distraction that is noticed by both cuddlers even if neither say anything about it.

  • ShaneSchruteShaneSchrute

    @JohnR1972 glad you’re having good experiences! If something like bad text comes up right before you should briefly bring it up with your cuddler so you can address the negative feelings you have and set them aside. Also digitally disconnect as much as possible 15 minutes before and after. Give those close to you a heads up that you won’t be available for a few hours; makes a big difference. And happy cuddling! :)

  • RadiantHugsRadiantHugs Mod
    edited February 2022

    @ShaneMTB thank you for listing some of the things which make for a great cuddle experience! The very first session I had with a pro was terrible as none of these practices were followed. It was also my last session with her. Later that week I drove two hours to meet with another pro who followed all the practices you mentioned above - and more. It made all the difference. The drive was well worth it.

  • ShaneSchruteShaneSchrute

    @CuddlesByDeep yes like most things effort and enthusiasm goes a long way. I’m so glad you found a good cuddler!

  • Mela_BMela_B

    @JohnR1972 I appreciate your comment. I work really hard at this because my cuddlers add quality to my life just as much as I add it to theirs.

    I would love to spend some time with you! 😊

Sign In or Register to comment.