Seen it time and time again. New cuddler listed as pro, message time to book something, deactivated a few days later.
Nothing inappropriate in my messages and karma is good but what kind of messages would a pro get flooded with that would turn away alot of potential cuddlers?
@altering Being a pro is not easy. At all. The pros on here with longevity, that consistently post on forums, that reach out with comforting heart and spirit are a special breed of human being. Not everyone is made for it. It would be easy to get burned out if you didn't truly believe in what you are doing. Personal lives can also be a factor. Who knows.
Scarlette nailed it. It really can be overwealming. Also there are a lot of safety concerns. Reguardless of good karma or a nice profile, some people just have their guard up more.
Its better that they delete their profile rather than leave it and just never log on, or to just stick it out and be uncomfortable; that can lead for bad sessions all around.
Luckily there is planty of pros in the LA area
I've noticed a high rate of pros and non-pros splitting. I think both are just testing the waters and some pros are just seeing what they can catch. I've seen some new pros claim they're "just curious" while others have told me it's "just for the money." Wish there was almost some kind of status before "pro" where newbie-pro-wannabes had to clock three successful sessions before earning the Pro badge.
Whatever the reason I'd have to echo the statement from @Scarlette stating that not everyone can do it and it does take a certain kind of person to do it. How has @Brandi lasted so long? She's made of the right stuff. Not saying it's been easy as I'm sure she's had her problems but she's still standing and active on the forums.
I don't think finding a cuddle match is easy. At all. Pros can sometimes have it rough but clients and those looking for non-pro cuddlers have their own set of problems.
As always good luck to us all.
@chococuddles a great example of what you are talking about is how @blueIris came into the community.
I just think girls are curious and create pro accounts and it ends up not being what they expected or they decided it’s just not for them. Some There are also quite a few who have sessions but don’t last long as pros. The life span of a pro Cuddler is actually quite short.
I think there is more than one reason for this. Increased competition is one because more women are becoming cuddlers as a way to make extra money. I also agree with Morpheus that some new cuddlers decide it's not for them and they quit shortly after. The third reason is because of money. I think men want to cuddle, but they may not have the money or they decide to spend it on massages because they need them.
I recently exchanged messages with a new pro who lived a couple miles from me. She had one review,but deactivated in less than a week. Was really disappointed because she seemed nice and I had planned to see her in the near future. I`ve had similar experiences a few times in the past year.
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Some new pros are apprehensive about cuddling, so I will use the first session for going to eat with them. I am sometimes their first customer. Then the second session could be for cuddling. I think it’s better that way if someone is new and never was with a customer before. I think they quit sometimes because they don’t have a lot of customers and not necessarily because they dislike the profession.
@Alternis - We're all only speculating, but to answer your question specifically, the kinds of messages that would cause a pro cuddler to quit would likely be the ones overtly requesting sexual services or insinuating them. We all get them, but some people can't handle it. The pros that last have a thick skin, shrug it off and report the senders of such messages. But messages aren't the one and only reason people quit.
There are scam pro profiles who get caught and banned. There are mercenary pros whose hearts aren't in it who decide after a short while that they dislike cuddling strangers, and it isn't worth the money to them. There are fearful women who are so afraid of being sexually assaulted or even being improperly touched that they soon quit. There are uncouth pros who are on their phones while cuddling a client and soon put themselves out of business, as do the ones who don't really like it, who don't respond and who lie there like a dead fish.
It definitely takes a special kind of person to last and excel in this business, as @Scarlette and @Brandi have said. Not only do you have to be bold, assertive, friendly, fearless, warm, nurturing and love cuddling, you also need to have a good head for business.
Since pro cuddling is an unregulated industry, anyone on a whim can hang out her shingle and go for it with absolutely no barriers to entry. The high quit rate is likely indicative of people who should not be in this business in the first place weeding themselves out.
Very well said @Blueiris!!
Boundary testing by potential clients would be my guess for pros quitting early on. It takes some time dealing with people in close physical quarters before you learn what your boundaries are much less how to be firm on them.
I’d also like to point out that the ones who are obviously having inappropriate expectations of a pro cuddler aren’t the worst ones-because it’s easy to identify. The hard part is when you’re taking with a “nice guy” who just keeps saying something coercive but that COULD have been misunderstood...when you’re new, you may not be sure you are reading them correctly and you may be doubting your instincts.
My advice to new pros is to think about your boundaries before you do this, really think about scenarios and what you would do. Role play with your friends. And don’t doubt your instincts. For me, I prefer to tell someone directly what behavior or statements led me to decline the cuddle. Maybe they really don’t understand that these boundary-testing statements/behaviors are coercive and really undermine what we are supposed to be here for-comfort and connection. If they respond rudely then I know they probably meant to be coercive.
Everything said here is only speculation about the new pro quit rate, as we don't have statistics about how many join and quit in a short amount of time vs. the length of time those who are still on here have been active. I also doubt that anyone polled or interviewed those who have quit to ask them why.