@WriterGF - Maybe if they're married and their spouse doesn't know about it...but people don't think of strip clubs as undercover SW...well most of them anyway.
Also, I see people check into one on Facebook. They have no shame for that kind of thing.
@CharlesInWI - I really don’t want to agree with you… that is such a depressing way of looking at relationships… but at the same time, there is significant evidence on your side about the cultural shift from relationships to transactions.
I recently watched a YouTube video where I agreed with some of the points it raised but disagreed with its ultimate conclusion. I am not going to link to it because of the subject matter but the title was along the lines of why more men today are choosing to get their non-platonic needs met through transactional means than relationships.
Again, I disagree with the conclusion of the video (that transactional was “better” for men) but it raised some interesting points about the risk to reward ratio in many modern relationships where the laws clearly favor one party over the other when a relationship ends (especially depending on what state you live in).
Because we, as a society, have gotten to a place of serious isolation, I could see it becoming mainstream---because, quite frankly, it's so desperately needed!
Aces, the elderly, the differently-abled, heck-- just plain lonely folks-- all would definitely be beneficiaries of such an industry! Our technological, fast-paced world has given rise to an alarming increase in male suicide--- mainstreaming platonic cuddling might help with that!
I've shared with friends, but not with close (religious) family, that I engage in Platonic Cuddling. Some have expressed a sort of giddy interest; others can't seem to separate physical touch from "finding the one." I'm genuinely grateful--as someone whose spouse just isn't geared for prolonged physical entanglement--- for even the very CONCEPT of Platonic Cuddling, and I'd LOVE to see it go mainstream!!!
It’s becoming popular on social media platforms. I heard one of my cuddlers say they found the site on Tik tok. I’m only worried that the younger generation will get on it for all the wrong reasons. Not fully understanding why people get on this site and what potential dangers they can get into.
@CharlesInWI relationships (of all sorts) have always been transactional in some form or another - we just talk about it and analyze it more openly now than has been done in the past. Because our time and physical/mental/emotional energy are limited resources, we will always have to budget them for the relationships in our lives based off of how we prioritize those relationships. To some degree at least that is going to be decided by how much we get back in return from those relationships because entirely one-sided relationships are generally rather unhealthy from a psychology standpoint.
We don't tend to think of them as being transactional because up until now we did not place value on our time and energy - we placed value on our productivity. But with technological advances we are shifting towards a society that favors service work over production, which means time and energy become more important than pure product created. Younger generations have started recognizing this and so have started applying business and economic terms to concepts like time, energy, and relations because they are all interconnected - thus you get the examples you gave.
Edit to add - side note: it's this concept that is the philosophical base for universal basic income - that we all inherently have value and contribute by existing in our interactions with others. The basic income only covers living necessities, so people would still need to contribute more of their time/energy via service and creative work in a fully roboticised production society if they want any luxuries or extras.
It's not even socially acceptable for enthusiasts yet. I'd hope for that 1st
@cuddlefaery It's not true that relationships have always been transactional and quantifiable. There's no reason they must be. Relationships can also be built on a foundation of generosity and selfless dedication in partnership from both parties. Historically, this has been widely codified in marriage vows such as "will you love him/her, comfort him/her, honor and keep him/her, in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, be faithful to him/her as long as you both shall live?"
Of course, this breaks down when relationships are entirely one-sided, but that isn't a form of partnership, it's a form of exploitation.
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@cuddlefaery
Perhaps so.
And, I thank you for showing me the truth.
All we have is our time and energy, and once it is put so plainly, no one else can possibly be worth my time and energy, as spending those things on another can never return what has been given, or more accurately, lost.
I have been doing this work since 2019, and I receive fewer negative reactions now than I did four years ago. The cuddling industry needs more reforms and regulations before it will receive mainstream acceptance.
If sex work were decriminalized (so that people did not conflate this with sex work) and if insurance would cover it that would go a long way but I believe we are several decades away from that.
@xandriarain - It makes no sense why SW is criminalized. What two consenting adults does behind closed doors is none of our business. I keep hearing excuses such as "they can't tax it" and I'm thinking, why the hell not? They can tax it like any other paid hustle. Professional cuddlers pay taxes don't they?
If they had a legal place to advertise their services, hopefully there would be no need for them to come here.