I’m curious why so many females post pics in very revealing attire and expect to not attract men that want more than cuddles. To me , it signals they are selling more than what they claim.
They need to be reported
Sex sells.
To be fair this whole site is about respecting consent, and it doesn't matter what someone's wearing, no means no and platonic means platonic 🤷🏼 I understand that our society is inherently prudish, and women are expected to be "chaste" and "cover up" to control what others think of us, but I say that's BS, and applying some sort of meaning of "selling more than they claim" is way too close to "they're asking for it" for my comfort.
If it falls within site rules I see no issue with it.
@Runawaycuddles on this one we agree totally.
Let's not expound on rape culture. When I'm at the pool, women wear bikinis. I don't have this overwhelming urge to grope them. So why is that different from CC profile pictures?
There is an irony to allowing photos on here in clothing and locations which aren’t acceptable for cuddling per the site rules. Since cuddling in a pool or hot tub isn’t allowed, those photos shouldn’t be allowed. Since cuddling in swimwear isn’t allowed, those photos shouldn’t be allowed. Since cuddling in just undergarments or topless isn’t allowed, those photos shouldn’t be allowed. It’s hypocritical regardless of sex or pro/enthusiast.
@cocoabomb Yes, this is what I believe the issue is. I report shirtless guy pictures frequently for exactly this reason; not allowed during cuddles = not allowed on their profile. It's not because I wanna jump their bones and can't control myself if I see them shirtless. It's about the spirit of the site (and the literal rules).
"Avoid provocative photos such as shirtless ones for men or a focus on cleavage for women. These can attract unsafe people and give the wrong message to people visiting the site."
https://www.cuddlecomfort.com/forum/discussion/comment/35089/#Comment_35089
~ Sunset Snuggles
🦄 Enthusiast 🏞 Travel Fiend 🐘 Animal Lover
@cocoabomb That's a slippery slope. maybe I should take down my picture of me in a river in Austin since I don't plan on cuddling in a river. Pictures are an expression of pple and over policing cuts into pples rights or forms of expression .
I used to feel the same way at one time. Especially since I grew up with the generation that was more prudish.
I usually get along with more progressive and younger people and have learned a lot about consent and such. Plus we have a yearly slut walk here. When I used to clean streets at work, I would read the signs and talk to participants.
Some woman may do it because they wanna look provocative, and some could be selling themselves, or some could be dressing that way every day. It’s not for me to pass judgment.
If you wouldn’t complain about men in shorts, shirtless or in tank tops, you sure should not be complaining about women. This site has rules. They are (generally) behavior oriented. That is for a reason.
Depends what’ your definition of provocative is . Some people consider provocative what others consider conservative. Just because someone has boobs doesn’t mean they should have to wear a turtle neck .
Plus we are all adults who should be able to control ourselves regardless Of what the other person wears . A woman’s clothing is never a justification for men behaving badly .
While I agree that one's attire does not permit anyone to act inappropriately, I do think there should be a certain expectation of professionalism in photos when it comes to the pro accounts on here. If I showed up to a session in lingerie, my clients would be very uncomfortable and question my intentions. My job is to keep the session in a safe and platonic container, and part of that is dressing modestly in both my profile photos and in person because we are not pursuing arousal. This is not because I believe women should be chaste but because of the responsibility that comes with the job title of being a cuddle therapist. This is true for both male and female cuddle therapists. If someone wants to wear a more revealing outfit on their personal time or on their personal social media, they should be able to exist without harassment or accusations. But in a professional role, we must dress in a way that is conducive to the type of work we are doing.
This is very misogynistic. Women can wear whatever they want, if a man gets aroused by revealing clothes then just look away, or in Cc Case find another pro
The site sometimes removes photos that play up sexiness.
@SunsetSnuggles Shirtless isn’t against the rules as context is the site’s disclaimer. Focus on cleavage is subjective and misogynistic.
@cocoabomb It is all subjective and depends on context, but that's quoted from the official FAQ, and the mods remove mens shirtless photos all the time.
Yep! @Runawaycuddles and @pmvines 💯💯💯 agree with what you said!
Also @xandriarain yes about having a certain level of professionalism. NOT because people should judge pros for what they wear (ie, assuming they are selling s*x according to their clothing in their pics) but because with any job one should try to keep up some sort of professionalism.
If anything, wearing comfy tee and pajama pants in pics would be considered appropriate for this site! 😊
Shirtless and underwear (regardless of gender) are against the rules and we are removing them all the time.
@RedFox16 posted: "If anything, wearing comfy tee and pajama pants in pics would be considered appropriate for this site!"
100% agree with this, and when I finally risk changing my brand with a new profile picture, I plan on it being in my usual cuddle clothes...camouflage leggings and a crew-neck Cuddle Puddle t-shirt. 🐇 I've realized since I joined that a picture of me in a dress I'll never cuddle in is completely pointless. 😆
If you are provoked, try to figure out why.
Just because someone has boobs doesn’t mean they should have to wear a turtle neck. Plus we are all adults who should be able to control ourselves regardless Of what the other person wears. A woman’s clothing is never a justification for men behaving badly.
THIS! THIS! THIS! THIS^^^^^👍👍👍
@pmvines THIS IS WHY WE ARE CUDDLE BUDDIES!😁😁😁
Thank you so much for commenting this. Very much appreciated!😊
A fabulous and highly relevant tale from the London Underground.
https://www.thepoke.com/2019/05/13/simply-fabulous-tale-from-london-underground/
I've just looked through the first 48 profiles of women with photographs in the OP's area, and the number that I would describe as 'provocative' or 'revealing' was a big fat zero. It is true that there were a couple of bikini shots, but these were in an appropriate context and very clearly innocent. I write as somebody who does report profiles which I suspect to be of sex workers or have inappropriate photos. (Which profiles usually disappear very quickly.)
@vh7
I’m curious why so many females post pics in very revealing attire and expect to not attract men that want more than cuddles.
Because that is a perfectly reasonable expectation. They are just ordinary people posting ordinary pictures.
To me
This is the vital part of your post. The amount of sexuality implied in the profiles is zero: what's happening is that you are inferring sexuality where there is none.
LOL, why would anyone report them? How about you mind your own business and let them attract clients how they deem fit. Unreal.
@Midnight01 what people post on this site IS my business because it affects a community of which I am part, and which I care about. It's everybody's business.
I Report photos when I believe they do or may break the terms of service. That is how this community works.
@CuddleDuncan You probably know that I agree, lol.
@Midnight01 The mods will deal with the photos per the site rules, be they shirtless guys or whatever else. If the reports were not wanted by the site administrators, or false/prudish reports were being made, those reporting would, in turn, be dealt with by the mods, instead.
I don't wish to see anyone getting kicked off the site for violating TOS, but I, personally, have no problem with someone expressing themselves through "provocative" photos.
Other than that, I have no opinion on the matter.
@TxTom in the case of a picture, in the first instance the person would simply be asked to remove the photo.
Nobody wants to see anyone being kicked off the site for breaking the terms of service, and banning is a last resort. In fact in my experience banning is taken very seriously indeed by the mods. The only exception is brand new accounts which clearly don't belong here
I love a provocative photo myself, just not on this site.
@achetocuddle thank you. I had a feeling you would!
@TxTom Not to worry, only straight-up nudes will get people banned. I've seen near porn-worthy crap that was just quietly removed and the profile left up. I've also seen insane kinks mentioned in profiles and that has also simply been removed, and the profile left up.
The site owners know people are sexual beings...it's just not meant to be the focus, here. Same reason you'll occasionally see threads of people asking why sexual orientation is even listed, if it isn't supposed to matter.
Similarly, I go 🤔 when someone's bio specifically focuses on them being single, or polyamorous. All of these things are aspects of people, like the provocative pictures may be a perfectly fine aspect, but not what the focus of this place is about. le shrug
But obviously no matter what, nothing and no clothing choice is an excuse for boundary-pushing or sexual assault.
@SunsetSnuggles - I'm sure they must get some kind of warning and/or a timeout. We only see when somebody is banned.