I was blocked after a guy begged me for hours after I told him I had plans (before sharing photos) to agree to a cuddle, he was playing around apparently (obviously) because after a "maybe if I am free later " but I still need to meet FIRST. He is asking to meet , like a blind date, now I'm like in my head "absolutely not," send me a photo game, send me your picture first, I should have stopped responding, but in for a penny in for a pound at this point my curiosity gets the best of me, hell I'm getting ready for a party, but perhaps after I ll work in some time, So he texted I'm booking a room, spends a couple pics finally cuz I'm not going anywhere and can't recognize you. Then he blocks me.
I've blocked guys for being obnoxious about sending photos. Send yours. I'll share my photo if and when I choose. Be gentleman and it will get you where you want to be
I agree with @WriterGF in his implied point of you don’t really know why they blocked you unless they say why they blocked you. I’ve been blocked before, and as you are not supposed to try to contact the one who blocked you, in any way, I asked a mutual friend on here, and it wasn’t really anything personal about me.
You can guess reasons, but unless they say in a message before the block, you won’t really know why.
@WriterGF I suppose that could be the case. I'm not taking it personally, but an explanation would have been nice. Especially since I had over a month invested in talking with this person. I don't think a reason for them blocking me was too much to ask!
@cruiseguy88 Someone blocked me too for not texting them everyday and responding to their messages .. I was so confused !!!! Like was it that deep ???
Would some people really like it if before being blocked the blocker wrote things like: I know you better and I just don't like you. You are weird, wrong, not very bright, boring, needy, unkind, self-centered, etc. I don't like your forum posts (if that applies).
There would be nothing wrong with wanting people to tell you such things as this, just curious as to whether there are that many that would be more satisfied if they were told these things.
Most people don't want to confront others with things they think will hurt their feelings. And there is no way to know who these certain people are that would prefer to get these messages before they are blocked. I suppose you could put it in your profile, but that would not help you get messages and cuddles.
There is such a thing as "engage and enrage" - in a lot of cases, if you are going to do something perceived as negative like blocking, it is better to just do it and not get into a conversation as to why. Even if the person can't talk with you anymore, they would still be free to trash you elsewhere if they are angered.
Blocking is a boundary. Boundaries shouldn’t be debated. It doesn’t need to be any more complicated than that.
I block to keep my Visitor's List clear of Pros and people I will never cuddle due mostly to location. So my Block List is always close to full. When it fills up I just unblock the oldest 10 accounts. When CC figured out I was using it that way they limited the amount of blocked accounts to 200. So ya'll have me to thank for it not being unlimited.
@PeopleLikeUs I use the 'block people' exactly for the same reason... to keep the cuddlers list to the point when I search for cuddlers in my area with other search criteria. It's not personal, i do this for my convenience.
Completely agree with @WriterGF and @jlm, and also with @achetocuddle, in not writing it all out. It’s a boundary and doesn’t have to be discussed, if said blocker doesn’t want it discussed.
@SweetPeaJen that’s a bit odd. The whole point of blocking someone is that you no longer want any interaction with them. If they can see that you have blocked them that might trigger some people. Your profile should not be visible at all.
@ShaneSchrute thats a security flaw here, then. If you block someone, the whole point is that they shouldn’t be able to see anything about you (comments, profile) from then on.
@SeekerInVA I didn't make the rules. 🤷♀️. Just telling you how it works. 🤷♀️😂
I’ve blocked a few lately who haven’t read my profile and have asked me for something I won’t do and I don’t want to receive any more messages from them, obviously. If I’ve been blocked, I don’t know, don’t care, too tired to care, I rarely contact anyone to find out.
I got all of you blocked. You’re welcome.
@SweetPeaJen I realize that. It’s still weird.
Blocking is obviously cool and I fell into a behavior that I don't understand. And that's my fault. In this accepted way of communication (on this website) it now appears to be punctuation or some kind of replacement for facing your decisions.
This is not healthy behavior. There's a person on the other side of that click. (I know I need to get over it) but explanations aren't a nuisance they are human. Blocking is a game where nobody wins. And it appears to be a game.
It completely destroys trust, ends relationships and is celebrated by everyone. Soon you'll run out of people to block.
It builds nothing and destroys everything.
Building a friend to trust is HARD Blocking a dumb gullible idiot is EASY
This behavior eats itself. It cannot be sustained.
@GuitarGar You seem to be taking getting blocked by strangers on the Internet way too personally. These people do not know you. At best, if you have spent time with them on here, you are seeing only the side they choose for you to see, which may not be who they really are. Most people seem to feel no emotional obligation to a name on a screen. And let me ask - if someone took the time to explain to you why they were blocking you, would you shrug and say okay, or would you want to argue the point with them (which would be a natural inclination)? If it's the latter, there's your answer for why people aren't taking the time to explain.
Fact is, being online almost anywhere requires a thick skin. Because no matter how nice you are or whatever, you are going to get blocked, and rejected, and ignored. It's the nature of the online beast. If you are feeling grievously hurt when this happens, and I say this as someone who experienced the same thing many years ago, maybe online is not the best place for you.
(I had a friend for seven years on another site. We chatted all the time, I helped her through illnesses and family stuff and she help me through things too. Two weeks ago, her account vanished - no goodbye or anything - and I have no way to get in touch with her. There are a lot of possible reasons she could have left and I am sure they had nothing at all to do with me. Do I miss her? Yes, very much. But that is the difference between online friendships and real ones. They are here one day and gone the next. As Dorothy says in the Wizard of Oz, "People come and go so fast here.")
Blocking is not going to go away, because it is a fundamental way that people getting harassed have to protect themselves. In the same way people have a right to reach out and contact others, they also have a right to say, no, I don't want to be in contact with this person. No one is obligated to stay in touch with someone else or explain why they are choosing not to be. At the end of the day, it's no different than the site's right to ban people.
I worry that you are going to eat yourself alive getting so upset about it, and one day get so upset that you say the wrong thing and get yourself banned. That's not a good outcome for anyone.
@WriterGF
Hahaaa no chance of eating myself alive..need a larger fork for that..
It's my analysis of a glaring trend. In print, it appears worse. Not personal at all. If we talk about these things, IMO we grow.
I agree, harassment has no place in any society. Abusers are trash and have to be delt with. But we are talking about a casual disposable mindset.
We just need to think a little more about the long term affects of our actions. If our goal here is to connect, shouldn't we explore better options?
And if a block happens there should be no sign of either party interaction on the website...this can be fixed with a line of code.
Maybe, but you've already had two threads shut down that had to do with this. So it does seem to be something you are fixating on, at least here.
It would appear so.
The threads took on a life of their own. I posted a question, there seemed to be a need for others to vent...and it got outa control..something must have happened on that post, I have no idea, I had to leave and get my work done.
Next day, to my surprise, I got a warning and the post was pulled..I'm not supposed to talk about it.
But I'm fine..better after all events actually, I never had a REAL problem, only an opinion.
Like with this post they have opinions..valid opinions and their personal stories are interesting...mine is boring
After all this, 2 months on the website, many tongue lashings a couple cuddles and a block..this may be the time a brother needs a hug. (sigh)
Even so..I will never approach this subject again.
There is nothing wrong with blocking. A person who is so upset by blocking may need therapy and I say this in a gentle way.
@chrissy123xo Yes pretty frustrating when someone expects you to message them everyday and respond to them right away when they message you. And if you don't then they get a hair up their ass and block you!
@cruiseguy88 But didn't you just say you had no idea if that was the reason you got blocked?
General thing -- when you come on the forums to pretty much just complain, you are discouraging people from wanting to cuddle with you. No one wants that energy near them.
That's true, nor would anyone want scary energy from people who get upset easily, whether it be hurt feelings, anger, etc.
It is wrong for disturbed people or people in need of therapy, etc. to try to put the onus on those that block.
Don't be like Charlie Brown.
@magpie17201
You did block me. That’s very funny! I’m not sure if that was your intention but it made me literally laugh out loud.
Thank you for blocking me.
Omg guys DRAMA BOMB
Yeah, @ShaneSchrute I tried to look at magpie's profile yesterday and she had blocked me too, lol. It is funny but now I wish I could look at her profile to satisfy my curiosity, lol.