https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8692260/
There’s plenty more but I am not your computer and I am not going to derail a thread over a sidebar consideration. This was never intended to be a focus of the thread.
Loneliness is growing in all demographics, it is being asserted that it is growing more rapidly in males than females. I don’t think it is, I think it’s because more men are admitting it now and academic surveys have stated repeatedly that women traditionally admit to loneliness more freely than men. So my opinion on the subject is that. You are free to believe what you want.
This video frames friendships in a way that feels overly binary and reductive. It suggests that men and women approach friendships differently, idealizing male friendships as simpler while portraying female friendships as fragile. This perspective ignores the diversity of experiences beyond traditional gender categories. The notion that women would prefer male friends who "secretly love them" over female friends who "secretly hate them" is particularly peculiar. It reduces friendships to transactional or ulterior motives and reinforces outdated gender dynamics. Relationships are built on mutual respect, trust, and shared values, not secret romantic or antagonistic undercurrents. A broader, more inclusive view of friendships would acknowledge their complexity and transcend simplistic, gendered narratives.
Here in the west, and certainly in the United States, I was conditioned from a very early age to be: Independent, Competitive, Wary of Others, and Trusting of our One.
So, in my personal case, when my “One” bailed out of our twenty + year relationship all of that invested time and loyalty went from joyous to ruinous, and I realized that I am a horrible judge of character.
So, not only should I not trust Others, but I certainly can’t trust myself.
Which works out great, because as a male, no one else trusts me either.
Loneliness might be an epidemic, but in my case it’s better than bashing my head and heart against walls I didn’t build in a toxic culture I didn’t create.
@TheFunCartel . I looked at the study you provided and The study looks specifically at loneliness in men during the COVID-19 pandemic and explores factors like depression and low social support, but it doesn’t compare men’s loneliness to women’s or make any broad claims about gender differences. You’d need larger studies comparing both genders across various situations for that kind of conclusion. Thanks for sharing your perspective and I wasn’t trying to offend here.
This video would be an excellent textbook example of internalized misogyny and “pick-meisha” behavior. Down to the overarching stereotyping and generalizations.
Is this another reductionist repost from the “manosphere” ?
This is absolutely an example of a thread I wish I could hide from my feed.
@MonkeyNeedsAHug That would be a total dream feature.
A reminder that in this forum only men can be critisized but not women. We appreciate everyones cooperation and understanding.
Thank you.
@Sooson Exactly
I know for myself I have very few female friends and that has been the case since high school. I also grew up with 3 brothers. I was a girly Tom boy. But my dearest closest friends have always been men. Not to dive in too personally but for me I think a lot of hat was a safety thing and a trying to replace my father figure since the one I was born to was so extremely toxic. Female friendships have always been much more difficult for me. They mostly seem petty unless it’s with other females that tend to have more male friends for whatever reason.
@Sooson glad you blocked me after you chatted me up several times, you did me a solid! There are some bizarre incel vibes on this post, and it’s extremely upsetting.
@NikkiFM Bizarre incel vibes in which post ? Now some facts : 1- You approached me first. 2- You called me rude for calling you Nikki and stated you told me that your Name is Nicole and you dont like to be called Nikki. A quick scroll up our chat shows you never told me that. That is why I blocked you.
Posts that criticize harmful behaviors like sexual harassment or assault focus on specific actions and their societal impact on cuddlers, rather than making sweeping generalizations about an entire gender, as this video does. If you feel personally called out when people discuss the importance of addressing consent violations, that says more about you than the issue being raised. But by all means, keep posting redpill videos that have nothing to do with cuddling.
Yes anecdotal, but I've noticed everywhere I work, almost without fail women will talk smack about one another behind their back while being super friendly face to face. They really feel comfortable letting those feelings be known when talking to men.
Late 90s job at Barnes and Noble highlighted this the most for me, as it was mostly female employees and only myself and one other man. Anytime I'd get paired up with any woman for my shift there would be a myriad of smack talk about the other women there.
@wilderdude that's a good example
Lol! So this woman says that she would rather have male friends that are in love with her then female friends that hate her....😆😆😆
As a woman, either we are friends OR we are not friends "nobody doesn't need to be in love with me" to be a friend to me. 🙄
Popcorn time!😁
women will talk smack about one another behind their back while being super friendly face to face.
😆😆😆
@wilderdude I noticed that with both men and women co-workers at every job that I have had. Lol My faves are the men who get mad at other men for chatting with women (that they find attractive) at work (yet they are too chicken sh💩t to approach said woman co-worker to get acquainted with her) and instead made delusional comments (towards men who aren't chicken sh💩t like them) like:
"Look at there, HE is taking my woman!"
Lol. 😆
My question is "did said woman co-worker KNOW that she is 'your woman'?"
😆😆😆😆
For me personally, when it comes to jobs...I prefer to not socialize too much amongst other employees (including management too) unless it's related to the job. Period!☺️
I prefer being an island when it comes to jobs now.🏝️😁
👍🏝️👍🏝️👍🏝️
@Katota If the order of your comment and @wilderdude 's comment was reversed , 20 people here would have already accused him of whataboutism. The usual selective outrage crowd.
Thanks for that meme tho lol. You know which one.
@Katota 💯 Hahahaha!!!🤣🤣🤣🎉🎉🎉
@Katota 20 people here would have already accused him of whataboutism.
@Sooson Lol! It's the internet, someone is bound to be "accused" of something here. 😆
Lol! I was accused of "being a damsel in distress" on another thread. 😄😄😄
@Sooson What, you mean Wednesday? 🤔😁 She is my favorite "child of woe" at the moment.😁🖤
@SuperManCuddles
This is an interesting thread with various topics discussed in this forum and I'd like to give my opinions :-) . And please note that I'm not a psychologist so these are only my assessments. One mention above is incels/male loneliness. I for one think that comes from a societal shunning of a man's "essence" (masculinity). Masculinity is aggressive and dominating by nature to ensure the survival of our species since cave-man times and men have been "shamed" today to be a man. I embrace my masculine core and will not apologize to anyone for asserting myself (legally that is) where I want to be and I find that mentally healthy women want a masculine man in their life because they KNOW he'll make things happen.
Next, one comment was about finding it hard to be friends with a man because he will have an underlying romantic agenda. FOR THE MOST PART I believe that to be true.... and I believe it's true because of the force of nature; again to ensure the survival of our species. I believe that a healthy man will find a struggle to be "only friends" with most attractive women and the evidence of my points are all around us in society. I've found personally and from observation of people in my community that men and women cannot be "just friends" for a long period but rather that one or both will develop romantic/sexual feelings for each other. I'm sure I'll get some bad replies on this but before you react negatively please show how I'm wrong? and thank you all :-)
I agree, @Daddy29520 I've posted similar comments.
There is some strong disagreement to that school of thought here on the forums.
Along with the reminders, of course, that this isn't a dating site.
@Daddy29520 The shift in societal dynamics has shifted the dating landscape. When women gained access to bank accounts and social autonomy, the traditional power imbalances in relationships started to fade. It’s no longer enough for men to rely solely on being a bread winner; they’re now expected to offer emotional support, communication skills, and genuine partnership. These are Qualities that incels have not yet cultivated, particularly those who were never encouraged to develop emotional intelligence or interpersonal skills. It’s a reckoning that challenges the old norms of masculinity, requiring a different approach.
To you second point, Men and women can deffo be just friends. However, it can be challenging to build a genuine friendship with a man who is either single and unhappy about it or in a relationship and dissatisfied. In such cases, unmet needs for romantic or emotional connection may lead them to misinterpret any attention from a woman as romantic. the dynamic is akin to offering a man walking in aimlessly in the desert a glass of water. On the other hand, when a man is emotionally fulfilled and operating from a healthy, grounded sense of masculinity, fostering a meaningful and platonic connection becomes much easier and more enriching for both parties.
Id say 90 percent of my closest friendships are with women, always has been. A couple of whom I am currently revolving my week here in Denver around. It's totally possible for men and women to be closer than kin while still maintaining both typical and non typical gender identity, roles, and boundaries. Also helps to not always think with your dick or vagina.
I 90% agree with the above statement.
You can be friends with any human.
The problem is, with the vast majority of them, why would you want to?
@brownglucose thanks for the reply, however I wasn't referring to "old norms" of masculinity. Masculinity hasn't changed in many thousands of years; it comes from the testes of men and makes them a "man" and domination, achievement and aggression are inherent with a masculine core. Now to your well taken point, I know that the dynamics of the dating landscape have indeed changed, however my point is that human nature has NOT changed and that leads to the incels and other such repressed/lonely men as those men are feeling "forced" into a dynamic that is against nature itself. Even so, a man should control himself/urges and be a "gentleman" in society I fully believe that but nature doesn't change because society does. Take monogamy for example; it's the sought after status for MOST people in a relationship, yet it fails time and time again. Why? It's not in our human (both sexes) nature to be monogamous even though we truly aspire to it. I hope I'm articulating this well and thanks for your thoughts :-)
@TxTom thanks for understanding :-)
I’ve avoided commenting on this thread - because I actually like Sadia Khan and she has some solid insights on dating and relationships - but these shorter videos are just that - meant to provide just the right mix of sensationalism and shock value to draw people in. Let’s get real - no video is going to give any meaningful advice in a few minutes - so I’d put no value on this at all. I suggest people watch the longer interviews she has on YouTube. That said, she has a built herself a niche primarily in coaching men - so it’s unsurprising that the video presents a viewpoint from that angle.