Getting tired of this site

[Deleted User]midwestbest (deleted user)
in General

Serious conversation: I’ve been on this site for over a year now and have had nothing but people ghost me, not reply or stay active and not reply. I’d rather someone just tell me they don’t want to cuddle. That’s cool! Also, I’m not someone that’s gonna pay booquoo bucks for a cuddle session….this ISNT DATING IS IT? Because I certainly can’t afford that!😂 someone tell me I’m wrong🤷🏼

«13

Comments

  • [Deleted User]LadyLapCat (deleted user)

    Counterpoint, I was insulted and attacked when I sent a no thank you message, so now I don’t.

    Female enthusiasts receive a lot of mail, and have the luxury of being picky.

    If you aren’t able to be patient, or are uncomfortable with how things have gone, you may want to try something other than this.

    The site has definite limitations and if it isn’t meeting your needs, accepting that and moving on is a perfectly valid course of action.

    Expecting the site to be different, not so much.

  • [Deleted User]midwestbest (deleted user)

    Fair enough.

  • quincyq03quincyq03

    It’s not just this site. Ghosting and games are everywhere these days. Nothing unique to CC.

    No one’s pressured or required to respond. Women get a huge number of messages on here. I can’t fully blame them.

  • MTexMTex

    Unfortunately female enthusiasts also get ghosted. You start a conversation with someone and you think it's going well and then they stop responding to you. We have the same problem that you guys have. I think it's a small percentage of people that you actually connect with. It takes time, effort, & patience to get there.

    My tip would be to have an intro about yourself & why you want to cuddle when you message someone. And try to message those that have Friends & Karma because you know they actually want to cuddle & aren't just curious.

    Hope you get to cuddle sooner rather than later!

  • IronicMaidenIronicMaiden

    In my profile is a phrase that people have to say when messaging me, indicating they actually read my profile. Most don't include it, so they get no response. Of the few that do, the conversation tends to be dry. They don't reference anything in my profile. Answers are short and don't offer any conversation hooks. I don't feel like carrying the entire conversation myself, so it dies out pretty quickly. And they never have a profile longer than a sentence or two which says they love to cuddle (well, duh), so they completely fail to catch my interest.

    If you want someone to reply, give some indication that you read their profile. And have a good profile, to show why you might be worthwhile.

  • MelancholyMelancholy

    Almost every female cuddle enthusiast I have met on here was looking for a boyfriend or relationship.
    Been here over 5 years now. Just a few were not.

  • KozyKimKozyKim
    edited June 2025

    I know I am a pro, but I message everyone that messages me and I have cuddled everyone except for some people that I feel might not be on here for the right reasons. If someone can't afford it, I offer public sessions, and I am still affectionate. Sometimes new professionals have a lot of people messaging them. And that guy is so right. If I was an enthusiast, I would probably only be cuddling one or two people. And it probably would take a while before I picked the right person. Someone that was really platonic.

  • GryfGryf

    @IronLemon Glad to know you don't see people as "worthwhile" if their profiles aren't up to your standards.

  • IronicMaidenIronicMaiden

    @Gryf If your profile says nothing about you, if it's no different from dozens of other profiles, why should I expect that you're worth getting to know? Especially if your messages say nothing about you.

  • LadyVelLadyVel
    edited June 2025

    @Gryf So I agree with @IronLemon.
    it's hard to start a conversation with someone if there is nothing on their profile. How do we know trying to connect with them is "worthwhile", aka worth our time and energy?

    Take your current profile for example:
    No picture (not even an avatar), no real profile info.
    Just age, man, location... basic questions answered of who you want to cuddle, that you have a car, etc. But not even a TV show, movie, or job info... nothing that can really be used to strike up a conversation or to give the person reading it an idea of what type of person you may be.

    What is someone supposed to say "I also like to cuddle?" or "wow, I own a car too?"
    If someone is looking at multiple profiles to find someone to cuddle or recieving messages from multiple people, they are more likely to invest time in those that have more info on their profile or that send more than a basic message than those that don't.

    Edit to note:
    As a pro, I respond to every message but I still check profiles to try and get an idea of who I am chatting with.

  • [Deleted User]WriterGF (deleted user)
    edited June 2025

    As someone else said, ghosting is everywhere. God knows it's prevalent in the job market. Welcome to online 2025, where silence means "No."
    A female enthusiast gets buried in messages and may not have even seen yours.
    If you are only interested in enthusiasts (and that's your right), you will likely have a very long wait. Men outnumber women here by 8-1. The only reason pros exist here is that demand exceeds supply. The site is what it is and its nature means it has limited utility for some. None of these complaints are new and won't change anything. If you're unhappy here, it's understandable, but only you can make a decision whether it is worth your time to stay.

  • SunsetSnugglesSunsetSnuggles

    @LadyVel is completely on-point. I just had someone with a completely blank profile PM me, "I'm interested in cuddling if you are."

    ...With absolutely nothing to go on about someone's personality, interests, humor, nothing...how could I be interested? 🫤

    Of course I absolutely love to cuddle, and maybe that person is awesome, but if they don't put effort into showing who they are (either in their profile, or in their message), how can we differentiate them from the rest and gain interest?

    @midwestbest
    Ghosting instead of a simple explanation is very frustrating, indeed. It does seem to be the nature of the internet at large, this decade, moreso than before. I share your sentiments.

    ~ Sunset Snuggles

    🫂 Enthusiast 🌄 Travel Junkie 📸 Shutter Bug

  • AdentoAdento

    I’m a dude. I used to immediately respond to every single message I received and never judged. Skype, Discord, Text. ETC. When you do that, people notice. They love it. You have nothing in common with them and they will just… make it work :)

    At some point I realized that I was putting 100x more effort into these daily interactions than anyone else was. Furthermore I had a lot of friends who were really hard to talk to because it was always about their interests. I still never judge people and I still respond to basically anyone at first, but “hi” could be 7-10 business days lol. And yes, if I have nothing else to add to the conversation I’ll space out.

    People say it’s easy to reply “I’m not interested in talking to you.” but being forward like that is hard. People are naturally empathetic and it hurts to tell someone to f off after talking to them, and dealing with people trying to force things to work. The reward is being called a bad person anyway.
    I know that it’s also hurtful to be ignored but there’s also a pain in constantly having to actively engage people in a negative manner. It might not be the best thing to do but not engaging is so much better for the mental and emotional stamina of the other.

    And for pros, this can take on a whole other angle. Say this is a significant source of their income (20%+) They might care deeply about healing others, but they also care about their own life too! As someone who worked as freelance IT for a while, I learned that you can’t be buddies with all your clients lol. Also, you can’t be responsible for their stuff in your off time. There’s a reason people get paid for consultations.

  • DelphiCuddlCareDelphiCuddlCare
    edited June 2025

    @Melancholy wow fascinating! Im here for the exact opposite reason 🤣

    @LadyVel exactly! No photos, not profile info.... what's the incentive?

    @SunsetSnuggles like you say, ghosting is part of the territory... I tend to tire from conversations and folk who go in circles around there intentions and making a commitment to book. But then again I'm here for Pro cuddling...

  • [Deleted User]WriterGF (deleted user)
    edited June 2025

    @Adento To your point, I have brought up before the concept of "engage and enrage." You have no idea who you're dealing with here, or how they will deal with rejection ... they might shrug their shoulders and move on, or they might lose their temper and start arguing with you or harassing you. It is often, sadly, better (and safer) to just not say anything than risk being on the receiving end of someone else's anger.

    It's the same in the job market. Those companies who do bother sending rejection emails send them using "no reply" email addresses so they don't have to deal with arguments.

  • [Deleted User]Stuvent60 (deleted user)

    1sBitten and KozyKim... I love both of your responses, :) And I will be the first to admit I have been ghosted. It is actually happening right now which is somewhat heartbreaking because I thought there could be a connection but that is part of this whole process. No, this is not a dating site but when you think about the relationship that you are forming with someone to be so near them and provide such needed touch, it's probably best that the process plays out and takes a while to find that right individual. Also, quite honestly, the fredships I have made here and the kind words that have been shared mean almost as much as the cuddles themselves. A great and needed site. Not for everyone, and I myself have questioned my own longevity here. Hang there and good luck my friend.

  • Jits47Jits47

    I have messaged and heard back from a couple pros who I may use in the future, but thus far those who've responded promptly and consistently A) are too far away from me or cannot host) or B) out of my price range (some require two hour minimums) and to be fair, my schedule is chaotic and a pain, too, so much of it is also on me.

    But I will say this, I've definitely been ghosted or ignored by some pros, some even after I book a session with them. Couple times I booked a session and didn't hear back. One cuddler even set up a Facetime session, then never responded, never heard from her again. Not sure what happened, but okay.

    I totally understand that cuddlers need to feel safe in their work, I do. I support that. It's important.

    But I also think it's better to say upfront that the pro doesn't yet feel comfortable enough to move forward rather than ghosting or ignoring a client.

    I'm not really complaining, mind you, just more like sharing the experience I've had thus far in attempting to book my very first cuddle, which I have yet to do. Perhaps soon. But I wanted to echo the above that it's not always easy to book a session even in NYC with all the cuddlers that are here.

    And the search bar is frustrating, as that it doesn't really edit out what you don't want to see.

    That's all I have to share, wish everyone the best and take care.

  • ShaneSchruteShaneSchrute

    All things being equal and like most things in life: the effort and energy we put into this is the same amount of effort and the same kind of energy we’ll get back.

  • AdentoAdento
    edited June 2025

    @WriterGF Exactly. Can’t understate the danger. While I can say I would take a simple rejection with dignity, many people if not most will react angrily, and a very few dangerously. Others will “appeal” the decision and make it a hassle. The deeper you get into a conversation, the worse it is.

    I think @ShaneSchrute said it right as well. If you look over a profile and find genuine common interests, you’re likely to strike a conversation. You won’t win them all but I don’t think you should expect to. If you message 20 people and make conversation with two then you gained two for the price of your time.

    @Jits47 I agree that it’s frustrating and I’d personally prefer a polite “no thank you” but for our part we’re dealing with the defenses built up from likely hundreds of interactions. I think understanding that makes it easier to accept and to value the people we do connect with rather than thinking about the connections we didn’t make.

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    If there is nothing on their profile and no pic the obvious icebreaker is to ask if someone stole their pic and refer them to the CC lost and found. If they ask where the CC lost and found is I would respond with I don’t know, I’m lost myself, but we could cuddle until something shows up.

  • AL3XGage_06AL3XGage_06

    Your profile is objectively bad. There's not really anything to say because your profile is non-existent without even a full sentence. Getting approached as a male who isn't looking for a professional is already a very long shot. When your profile has the personality of a wooden fence post you shouldn't be surprised at the result.

  • [Deleted User]gem7 (deleted user)

    @TheFunCartel LOL

  • Jits47Jits47

    @Adento I understand inquiries being ghosted, but I think if you booked a session, the professional should respond in a reasonable time frame. I have to move things around in my schedule to make space for the session, and when I don't hear back, I don't know if I should keep the spot open or not. And scheduling a Facetime and not responding, I don't think that's very appropriate, either, but again, I do understand the need for caution, absolutely.

    I get it, it's a tricky wicket.

  • JubalJubal

    Your profile is objectively bad. There's not really anything to say because your profile is non-existent without even a full sentence. Getting approached as a male who isn't looking for a professional is already a very long shot. When your profile has the personality of a wooden fence post you shouldn't be surprised at the result.

    I hate to dogpile on, but have to agree with the above. @midwestbest there's little to nothing stated in your profile that would tell any of the ladies (pro or enthusiast) anything meaningful about yourself or your personality.

  • pmvinespmvines

    I'm not tired of this site. But I am tired of so many rants when things don't work out the way they want, and not willing to do anything to help themselves because it's easier to blame things on external factors and the faults of others.

  • [Deleted User]gem7 (deleted user)

    @pmvines I agree.

  • CurvynapsCurvynaps

    I get the best cuddle experiences through the CuddleParty.com site.

  • Mare_BearMare_Bear

    Pro cuddling is not comparable to dating, it's comparable to a therapy session. Those of us who are trained, licensed, do taxes, rent space, etc have as high an overhead as any other business and need to have rates that reflect that. I understand that's not affordable to everyone, I wish in the future this is a service that will be billable by medical insurance companies but we aren't there yet.

  • Mare_BearMare_Bear

    Also, yes, group cuddling events are going to be more affordable, I have them in Pasadena, CA

  • disneysamuraidisneysamurai

    Like everyone is saying, you gotta put more into your profile that tells your story and why you’d make a great cuddler. More importantly though, and I’m surprised not many people have mentioned this, but you need to get your karma reviews up. Right now you have none. For a ton of people on the site, including myself, karma reviews are the #1 thing I look at before deciding to connect with someone because 1) it shows that you’re trustworthy and more likely than not legit, and 2) other cuddlers are vouching and recommending you.

Sign In or Register to comment.